Justin was a sixteen year old kid living a “normal” life
in Chicago. He was well known among his groups of friends at school. On this
gloomy, dark day, each of these groups had prepared a eulogy to share the
memorable moments they had with Justin. One group of friends knew him as
“Justin, the lady’s man”. He would have a different girlfriend a week according
to his friends. His cousins would always tell me that he was a man whore.
Another group of his friends knew him as “Justin, the smartest kid in school”.
Justin would tell this group that he had a 4.1 GPA and how he received a 2200
on the SAT. The last group I talked to knew him as “Justin, the hero”. His
friends were admired by Justin because he had told them that he was in the Fire
Explorer program and that he would save people from fires. Who was Justin? As
his father, I have not figured out who Justin really was. At home he was a
quiet teen who would spend hours in his room talking to himself. It seemed
normal to me after I saw an episode about teens on Oprah. From the report cards
I received, he was a 3.0 student and his SAT score…well he never took it. He
would always claim that he couldn’t get girls because he was shy and was scared
to speak to them. The last time I checked, he was never in the Fire Explorers.
Who was Justin? This is a question that I will never be able to answer. All I
knew was that my son couldn’t handle the pressure of living a “normal” life.
Find the shape and tell it!
66 comments:
awhh... I can relate, we are all coming into ourselves, and who we are today is different from yesterday, and the day version of yourself will be different tomorrow. We are al constantly changing and evolving so to say I am.... is not valid. I especially like this story because with college application and essays, there are a lot of questions touching on, "Who do you want to become," " Where do you see yourself after college," how can you answer that question when you barely can grasp who you are on a basic level. Also, in this story the idea of having a normal life is considered to be good grade, relationship, and high SAT scores, thus those people are living a normal 'good life'.
Kayla Fulton
10/1/2014
Period 1
Now I'm very curious who was Justin? What type of pressure was he living through, was he bullied? Was he neglected? It seemed that he had a large group of friends, but then again when someone dies people suddenly seem to care. How ironic. I was really surprised that this story was written from the perspective of Justin's father, because in the beginning I got a sense that it was someone he didn't know. Someone who was walking by the graveyard witnessing Justin's funeral from afar.But now that I think about it we expect our parents to know us the best, they raised us and there around us 24/7 right? But that's not true especially around the teenager stage, we tend to drift off and try to be independent. I love the irony in your story. Justin was crying for help with all his lies but who could tell since most of us never admit when somethings bothering us. Sorry now I'm babbling on, but anyway really good job buddy! It was a simple story but the depth in it is incredible.
Evelin Conde
Period.5
10/2/14
I didn't expect the narrator to be the father at all! This story was really relatable to read and I think it connects to majority of high school students in general. We're all trying to figure out who we are and it's always hard to figure out who you are when you're with different groups of people. We all think we're supposed to be one way with one group and another way with another group. We can never really think for ourselves. So when people ask you who you are and to describe yourself, it's so hard because you don't even know who you are. It's also an eye opener because many students do "give up" and it's sad to realize it because at one point or another, we've all gave up in different ways at a point in our lives. I really loved and connected to this story. Great job Hector!
-Caitlin Nguyen
Period 5
I love how you explained Justin through the eyes of the father. The impact of the realization that the father didn't even know who hiss own son was was very striking. It made me consider how in today's era that our parents might not even know who we are. Nevertheless, the fact that they are our parents lets us know that they will always know who we are even before we do. And as the father affirms: "All I know is that my son couldn't handle the pressure of living a 'normal' life. " initiating that he may not have known if his son was a "lady's man" or any of the other details about him, but he knew who his son was initially. And just that alone was enough for the father. The father also imply's that his own son ended his life due to the pressure. Though even before that the father keeps speaking about his son in the past tense and or third person. As if his son were no longer with him. Allowing our minds to wonder to different types of scenarios. Great story!
-Cynthia Alcala
Period 5
The first thing I notice when reading was quotation marks surrounding normal, it is as though the story is emphasizing on the question,What is normal? what do we consider normal? Towards the end of the story when the father says, "All I knew was that my son couldn’t handle the pressure of living a “normal” life."It makes me question why Justin told his friends that he was a 4.1 student and that he was in the fire explorer program? was he trying to make his life more exciting or be seen as something more than the "average teen"or was he stressed that he wasn’t the person he told everyone he was? all these questions make me reflect on my own life and makes me wonder who was Justin really, what was he striving to be? Very relatable story of trying to figure out who we are and what do we want to be or be seen as? I love how you incorporated the view points of his different groups of friends, it kinda gives us an idea on who Justin really is. I also was not expecting the narrator to be his father, it is a bit ironic in a sense that Justin's father knew more about Justin than any of his friends, yet still didn't know who Justin was and now will never get to. I really like this story it makes me think and made me a bit sad when I realized that Justin's father has lost his son to the pressures of life and will never get a chance to see who his son will grow up to be, nor did he get an idea when his son was alive.
Wow! I did not expect the narrator to be the father AND he didn't know about his son's life. Justin seems to have a split personality disorder, where he tries to fit in with different groups. It seems as if he wasn't sure of his identity, thus he had to keep on changing who he was and being someone who he truly wasn't, and this is relatable to many various age groups of students within the educational system. In high school, people are still trying to fit in, and it is hard for someone to please all groups, when in reality, we shouldn't try to please everyone, but ourselves. In addition, I can see where the father is coming from when he says, "I never knew who Justin was," because, in reality, many of our parents don't even know who we are. They think they know all about us, but in reality, there are harsh realities in our own life, and we tend to avoid telling them to our parents, thus they truly can never say, "I knew everything about my child." I just want to know how did Justin actually die? Like what method did he use to take his life? Might sound a bit gruesome, but I want to know! Nice use of a cliff hanger. And I also want to know, what does it mean to have a "normal" life? That question is so broad, and has many open ended answers. Overall, this was a short, simple, yet deeply impacting story, and I enjoyed it a lot! Good job Hector! :)
Simran Bajwa
Period 1
Well it seems to me that this Justin Character was a liar. ;) I like this story, it's different but relatable. To me it reveals how people feel the need to lie so that they can have the supports and admiration of their peers. I was shocked when I found out it was Justin’s father asking who Justin was. I thought that was a nice touch to the story, Great Job!
Kaleha Spencer
Period: 4
10/9/14
For most of the story, I thought the narrator was Justin's best friend or someone similar, so it surprised me that the narrator was actually the father. By using the father, it definitely adds a different perspective to the story, since parents and peers are completely different groups. From your story, it seems that Justin's parents were perfectly okay with how Justin was living his life; shy and average. But it's obvious that when Justin was with his peers, he wasn't content. He made up new stories and became a new, shiny, person, which the real Justin could not live up to. Speakers always tell you to no to peer pressure, but they usually mean in the context of drugs or crimes. You showed that ALL peer pressure is bad, which I really appreciate. Everyone should be content with the way they are living life and should not be pressured to try to change it, or in this scenario lie about.
Wow! I really loved this story it had so many details. Great job
period 2
Sukhmeen Grewal
So I'm guessing that Justin was a fictional person most likely wrong but overall a good story kind of sad because the dad and his friends really didn't know who Justin was. I think that Justin was really a teen that couldn't figure himself out, I liked the story but i thought that your detail was kinda vague maybe some more detail and background it would have enhanced an already great story. It was really a good story.
I find this story to be one that many people would be able to relate to. Feeding their peers lies and looking for acceptance. The ending surprised me, finding out how Justin's father didn't even know who was the real Justin was; the one his friends see him as or the one he knows at home. But it did capture my attention, and I did enjoy it. It has that quality that allows the reader to come up with their own ideas as to how the story progresses after it ends, which is something I really enjoy. Nice work!
`Cristina Sanchez
I feel like a lot of people are able to relate to this story. Feeding their peers lies and creating a fake side of them to try and fit in with society. I also found it interesting how the father doesn't know which side of Justin is the real one: the one his friends talk about or the reserved one he's familiar with at home. I loved this, great job!
-Cristina Sanchez
This actually made me sad but it showed the reality of a teen just trying to fit in. It seems to me that is all he wanted. This always dawns some truth on parental relationships with their kids because sometimes kids just feel as though they do not open up to their parents a lot and it is sad because sometimes parents are just so busy, it is like do they get to even know their kid on a personal level.
Hey! Woah, well first I would really like to congratulate you one this amazing storyline and the elements that you used in order for us to understand that the actual narrator of this story was his father and not in fact one of Justin's friends as I thought through the beginning of your piece. I really admire the way in which you added relative life events that we can all relate to now a days, and the pressure we find ourselves in to stand out and be special. Incredible job Hector!
This was awesome! It really goes to show that people only see what you show them. And unfortunately a lot of the time parents only see parts of their kids. I loved how the piece moved perspectives until it stopped on the one that truly knew Justin. It was definitely relatable, which is one of the reasons why I enjoyed reading it so much. Great use of tone and diction to get your theme across.
Isabelle Huynh
Per.1
Wow ! i really enjoyed this story. I Like how you showed justin's feelings, and how he was different everywhere! The Father was the one who was asking who his own son was, i was kind of shocked , but all in all , it was a really ggood short story. Good Job!
Lucca Kayahara
Period 2
10/12/14
Coming across a piece of literature such as this you realize that things are never what they seem to be. Just as Justin is not who he portrays himself to be. Not being able to handle the life pressures and struggles of an average teenager, may cause one to create an alternate universe. An alternate personality, of whom he wishes to be. So he could actually live a life in which he is somewhat.. okay with. Great Job!
1. Awh. The thing about your story here is that, this today, has become common amongst teens. Justin just hoped to fit in with his peers and have them accept him according to each of the group’s interests. Personally though, I think that faking his acceptance made it harder on him and did not give him the assurance he truly needed. Justin seems to be a type of kid that had multiple “characters” or in simpler words, personalities. But he couldn’t necessarily control the way he acted with different people, portraying that he had a personality disorder to some extent. The rhetorical question presented was “who was Justin?” and by incorporating this rhetorical question the audience is hoping to find out who Justin really was but will sadly never truly know. The way you used imagery in the beginning really set the mood of the whole story. Words such as “gloomy”, “dark day”, and even “eulogy” gave off a very dull and upsetting tone. Also, the fact that his own father didn’t know who he was made me really upset because Justin believed he didn’t have any REAL person to go to and kept all his feelings and thoughts bottled up inside of him making it even harder for him and lead to depression. Over all, this story was put together well, good job Hector!
This story made me realize that people have different personalitys with different people. This story leaves me curoius i want to know who justin really is and how his friends reacted when they find out he never took the SAT and didnt have a 4.1 . Good job i cant wait to read more!
Amazing piece, I feel like people can definitely relate. Justin may be a liar, but he was just trying to fit in. I feel like we all have those moments sometime where we just want to fit in the crowd ,be cool, and smart. Especially in high school with all the different cliques there are now these days, its difficult. What took me by surprise was when I found out that his father was the narrator. His father didn't even know who he really was. Which I find really sad because I feel like parents should be the ones who know most about their children. But I understand that nowadays teens hide everything from their parents. The story is really impacting and I really enjoyed it..
Grace Panjaitan
Period: 4
This is a really good little story. At first when i was reading i thought of Justin as this amazing student/individual who was smart and charming. Then i continued to read and i was a bit disappointing and surprised. What disappointed me was that Justin turned out to be a no good liar, and i was shocked about how Justin's father had no idea who Justin was.
Hector, I really liked your story! It was very relatable and is a great example of pathos and ethos, especially for our age group. The message I got from your story was that we all try to be people that we aren't in order to be accepted and when we want to be ourselves we are discouraged and become depressed. I think your story is a great message for teens who feel like they don't fit in, especially in high school, where people tend to form cliques and feel the need to be popular.
-Sophia Bobadilla
Period 1
As i was reading it i thought Justin was a pretty cool guy then i found that he was a dirty liar. I loved how you put this little story together. i was surprised to know that the father doesn't even know who his own son. Which is pretty sad. Such a small story with so much meaning. Good job!! :)
Andrew Hernandez
period 2
As i was reading it i thought Justin was a pretty cool guy then i found that he was a dirty liar. I loved how you put this little story together. i was surprised to know that the father doesn't even know who his own son. Which is pretty sad. Such a small story with so much meaning. Good job!! :)
Andrew Hernandez
period 2
HI Hector I have to say I really enjoyed your piece. The first thing I asked my self when I started reading this poem was what is "normal". The entire piece made me think about all the peer pressure that people our age have to deal with and the different masks that people put on just be "cool" like Justin. It was shocking to find at the end that all the things he said about himself were lies. Society would label him as "average". However this piece showed me that there's a difference of being normal and being average. Average is just a label society gives you, but normal is being who you are. great job Hector.
I really enjoyed this story hector! Great Job! I think this is relative to all kids especially teenagers because we are still trying to figure out who we are. Some times we may be after to express who we are so we falsly explain ourselves to other people. Its an image thing that we are all trying to fit also known as " Picture Perfect". Also i like how the atory is told from the fathers point of view. The reader is know aware of the fathers concerns of his son and he is simplying trying to study his son and reach out to him. Triple thumbs up !!!!!
-Deja Hardrick
Period 2
If your goal was to give me a huge amount of feels, then you did great. I found the story so sad when the dad says that he didn't know who his own son was. I feel as if Justin just wanted to fit in with his peers. Maybe he wanted to be someone that everyone knows and can be someone out of the ordinary. Very well written and I hope to see more of your writings.
Daniel Alaniz
Period 4
Wow Hector, way to use my name. HAHA jk but i'm pretty sure a lot of people can relate to this because there is always that one person who wants to be cool and lies to their friends and family because of it. Or this can also be looked in another way as in, by the father's perspective, it is as if he does not know who his son really is. Is he really the cool kid? or is he the shy kid who is too nervous to talk to a girl? I like how this relates to society since some teenagers do not act the same way as they would act as school, so this would cause confusion to who they really are.
This story was so easy to comprehend, yet so very sophisticated. As teenagers we tend to lie to our friends in order to gain acceptance by them. I am personally responsible for this. With that being said, I like the way that you use real life examples in order to connect with the reader, because many people have been caught in a lie at one point or another. Good job!!
Your story was quite intriguing. I found it interesting how you wrote basically about how even when you think you know someone, whether they be close to you or not, you really never know just how they are. This gives significance to the individual and makes people realize that we all have dilemmas of our own and to make them worthwhile and significant to you and you might just save someone’s life.
-nate shepard
The first thing that stuck out to me was your usage of the word "was" rather than "is", as if Justin was a person of the past. This played a heavy role in my interpretation of your piece. Justin it seems had the habit of lying to his friends, perhaps in hopes of impressing them. I feel that many people, children and adults alike, have this constant habit of lying to seem cooler. Society as a whole is obsessed with impressing our peers; and for a teenager, this is a big part of your life. Teens are growing up and always on a search for ourselves and our place in the world. The constant pressure to be as cool as the guy next to you can weigh heavily on our ways of thinking. Maybe Justin felt as if the only way to achieve that level of cool was to lie and make him seem greater than "normal" - whatever "normal" may be. The usage of "was" comes into play when the father begins to describe who Justin really was and that what he has shown to his friends was all but a lie. I took it to mean that maybe Justin had given up and perhaps committed suicide. Perhaps the pressures of society had become too much and the cool image had become a bit too much for him to handle, which is an unfortunate reality in our world. Both knowingly and unknowingly, we all put pressure on each other to become what society deems to be acceptable and successful. This pressure tends to rise and become unbearable. Overall, I think your piece was very though-provoking and speaks to what we need to change in our world.
Danielle Delgado
10/12/2014
Period 1
WAAAH! the narrator is the dad! That was so unexpected but it is true, some parents know little about their children. And Justin seems to like story telling, which we all do, especially teens. We try to boost ourselves to seem amazing to those around us, but in the end the truth catches up to us. I like your story because it tells the truth, even though some may deny it. The honesty and simplicity of this story makes it easy but mind blowing to read! -Katelynn Gutierrez period.4
Thia story was well witten and very detailed. Keep up the good work!
In this story Justin didn't tell the truth. But that was good how you were keeping it short and to the point.
Noah Martinez
P.2
This was a very interesting story.
When I read this story, I was captivated how you built up the plot from the mystery and identity of "Justin", from his relationships, his grades, and how people perceived him. The relationship between the speaker and the subject not only reveal a shocking, passionate tone to the story but also brings up the question of "What kind of bond did Justin have with his father?" The final thought provokes the reader to discover the truth. The worst thing a parent fears in life is not "knowing" their children. Maybe the parent had reasons why he didn't not communicate with Justin. Several young adults in today's generation can not have a completely honest, trusting relationship with their parents because of situations in which kids like "Justin" feel their parents will judge them and find it difficult to comprehend or give their children the support they need. Many children fear the scrutinization that their parents will provide out of initial reactions. No one knows. Many parents are afraid their "perfect" children will become troubled if they were interacting with a certain group of peers or under contrary experiences. Unfortunately, most parents will block out thoughts and in denial, refuse to attend to their children. But what most parents and young adults avoid to understand is that "Justin" might just be an average teenager trying to discover his purpose in life and possibly was hurt by society. Maybe he developed a barrier between his peers and his father so that they could not hurt him. He could have built a wall between his peers because it was better to avoid interacting with others because it wasn't "safe" as being alone while he avoided his father because no matter how hard he tried, he could not be the son his father wanted. Deep down inside, he was the little boy in his room crying because he wanted his father to hold him and love him regardless but when it was time for him to grow up and become his own person, Justin's father's personality, attitude, or beliefs stood in the way of their relationship. I believe how Hector wrote the father's reaction of not knowing his son, Justin did not have a strong relationship with his father before he died. "All I knew was that my son couldn’t handle the pressure of living a 'normal' life" shows a possible remorse from Justin's father. What he might have seen as "normal" might have broken Justin and his fragile heart. There are several "Justin's" in the world who have two sides of the story. The story their peers know and the story their family knows. I believe the reason Justin and so many others can not have a honest relationship with their friends and loved ones is because they are broken inside. For Justin, I believe he was broken by the relationship between his father and himself. I believe he grew up trying to impress his father while keeping himself hidden form everyone that when his father is trying to embrace Justin's life, he is hurt to find no one really knew him. In the end, he regrets that he didn't know Justin the way most parents claim "I know my child" and in the end, becomes his deepest regret. No child deserves to be broken, otherwise they will go to certain means to smile in front of others while on the inside, they are crying. Hector, you have written a deep, dark, passionate story that deserves to be praised and hopefully continued. I look forward to a continuation if there ever if one and commend your talent. Cheers, mate!
I can see this story being something that would happen in real life. everybody is always trying to fit in and he did it be lying. I was also surprised to find out the father was the narrator. Great story keep up the good work.!!
- Jesse Jauregui
Dang Hector this story is deep. I really love the way you laid it out, it's simple yet creative. The numerous perspectives of Justin's friends really got me wondering exactly who Justin is and when you ended the story revealing the speaker as the dad, it blew my mind. It made me realize a lot about today and how parents never really know exactly what us teens go through especially in school. Thank you for writing a beautiful story about a boy, just like many other kids in this society, and the real struggle of facing life as a teenage kid.
I was really shocked to read how little the dad knew about the sons life in school, and how different he was outside of his house. I feel like Justin's death brought together all the fake identities that he had and made everyone wonder who exactly Justin was.
I am not sure if I had interpreted this story correctly, but from my view point, Justin was just trying to please everyone. The ending really hit me. So many teenagers commit suicide or harm themselves because they are not happy with themselves, or because they feel as if they are not satisfying others as they should. This story really resembles the struggle that teenagers seem to go through with satisfying society. I feel as if Justin never told anything to his dad or showed his real characteristics because he did not have a close connection to his father or because he knows his father is obliged to love him because, well, he's his son whereas Justin had to try so hard to please everyone so he would lie. What I would like to know is why did he feel it so necessary to lie? People now-a-days have to understand that being themselves is the key to being happy, whether other people have a problem with them or not, individuals should never have to be judged doing and being what and who they want to be.
Very nice. The implications of the story are quite saddening, that Justin's father really didn't know his son that well or that Justin had to lie to others to connect with them. I really loved how you started your piece. The descriptions of Justin's "exploits" at the start had me suspicious of Justin. The shift to the parent's perspective was also very nice. Nothing in the first part of the story suggested that the narrator was Justin's father, yet the contrast between how Justin's father saw him and how Justin's classmates/friends saw him really added a moving sense of melancholy to the story. I can relate to the relationship to Justin's father and Justin himself and I imagine that many other teens can as well. Whether Justin is lying to connect to others, or if his father just truly doesn't understand him is up for debate for me, but personally I think a bit of both is mixed in with Justin's story. A good story that addresses a tough issue revolving teens. Kudos to you Hector!
I'm not going to lie, the story sounded really simple in the beginning but once I reached the end I enjoyed it so much. The use of the father's perspective of the story was perfect. It added to the effect that no one really knew who Justin was.
Angel Ramirez
Period 1
Wow, this piece is incredibly powerful. You have actually described something that I struggle with on a daily basis; the fact that people I see literally every single day of my life have absolutely no idea who I really am. I like how you left many questions and behaviors unanswered, including why it is that Justin even felt a need to extravagantly lie about his life, and who Justin actually really was. I like how you redefined that a "normal" life really does not exist, and that this statements embodies the theme that appearances can be deceiving. Great job!
HECTOR! I must say, you had me speechless with this thought provoking narration. I felt as if Justin was trying to conform to whatever society deems to be worthy instead of being "himself", which is the heart breaking realization his father comes to. His father also understands, that he in fact also does not understand who his child was, which unfortunately is common with parents (they do not truly know who their child is, or how they feel.) Overall a really great piece, good job. :)
This story is pretty relatable, because teens feel such a need to be accepted by their peers that they must lie in order to be accepted. I like how the narrator is the father, because fathers know their sons the best. It really gives us two contrasting perspectives and helps convey the message. Nice job!
Melany Mailangkay
Period 1
This story is really powerful, and is actually really relevant for most people today. People tend to lie to others to create this person that they secretly want to become. I really liked the message of this story, and teenagers today always hide things from their parents, so we're a completely different person around them. I think that this explains how Justin was looking for something more than a "normal" life, will average grades and nothing spectacular going on, so that's why he lied. Good job on your blog entry!
Anthony Hurd
Period 4
10/12/14
This story is really powerful, and is actually really relevant for most people today. People tend to lie to others to create this person that they secretly want to become. I really liked the message of this story, and teenagers today always hide things from their parents, so we're a completely different person around them. I think that this explains how Justin was looking for something more than a "normal" life, will average grades and nothing spectacular going on, so that's why he lied. Good job on your blog entry!
Anthony Hurd
Period 4
10/12/14
When I read this story, I was captivated how you built up the plot from the mystery and identity of "Justin", from his relationships, his grades, and how people perceived him. The relationship between the speaker and the subject not only reveal a shocking, passionate tone to the story but also brings up the question of "What kind of bond did Justin have with his father?" The final thought provokes the reader to discover the truth. The worst thing a parent fears in life is not "knowing" their children. Maybe the parent had reasons why he didn't not communicate with Justin. Several young adults in today's generation can not have a completely honest, trusting relationship with their parents because of situations in which kids like "Justin" feel their parents will judge them and find it difficult to comprehend or give their children the support they need. Many children fear the scrutinization that their parents will provide out of initial reactions. No one knows. Many parents are afraid their "perfect" children will become troubled if they were interacting with a certain group of peers or under contrary experiences. Unfortunately, most parents will block out thoughts and in denial, refuse to attend to their children. But what most parents and young adults avoid to understand is that "Justin" might just be an average teenager trying to discover his purpose in life and possibly was hurt by society. Maybe he developed a barrier between his peers and his father so that they could not hurt him. He could have built a wall between his peers because it was better to avoid interacting with others because it wasn't "safe" as being alone while he avoided his father because no matter how hard he tried, he could not be the son his father wanted. Deep down inside, he was the little boy in his room crying because he wanted his father to hold him and love him regardless but when it was time for him to grow up and become his own person, Justin's father's personality, attitude, or beliefs stood in the way of their relationship. I believe how Hector wrote the father's reaction of not knowing his son, Justin did not have a strong relationship with his father before he died. "All I knew was that my son couldn’t handle the pressure of living a 'normal' life" shows a possible remorse from Justin's father. What he might have seen as "normal" might have broken Justin and his fragile heart. There are several "Justin's" in the world who have two sides of the story. The story their peers know and the story their family knows. I believe the reason Justin and so many others can not have a honest relationship with their friends and loved ones is because they are broken inside. For Justin, I believe he was broken by the relationship between his father and himself. I believe he grew up trying to impress his father while keeping himself hidden form everyone that when his father is trying to embrace Justin's life, he is hurt to find no one really knew him. In the end, he regrets that he didn't know Justin the way most parents claim "I know my child" and in the end, becomes his deepest regret. No child deserves to be broken, otherwise they will go to certain means to smile in front of others while on the inside, they are crying. Hector, you have written a deep, dark, passionate story that deserves to be praised and hopefully continued. I look forward to a continuation if there ever if one and commend your talent. Cheers, mate!
Andrew Trinidad
Period 1
Well damn. The last line broke my heart because it's sad to realize that teens today will act like everything is okay and deep down feel so unhappy to the point where they become suicidal. When I first read the title alone, I knew it was going to have to deal with either death or someone who had changed dramatically by the "was" in the title. As I read, I really began to wonder... Who really was Justin and what caused him to be so unhappy? The speaker being his father and him not knowing what his son was like really can relate to a lot of teenagers nowadays because the majority go and lock themselves in their rooms. I'm one of those kids to be honest, but after reading this I want to spend more time with my parents and make sure they really know who their daughter is. Great job getting the audience to relate to this piece! It was wonderful to read!
Idalys Martinez
Period 1
Wow. This was a really good story, Hector . From the start, I already had the sense that something interesting was going to happen when the word "normal" was emphasized with quotations. I feel like this is a story a lot of people can relate to, some directly and others in another way. To me, Justin represents the pressure to conform to other people's ideals shown because of the many "sides" he had to himself,which he couldn't keep up with in the long run. A lot of people can relate to the feeling of acting different around certain people and eventually not knowing who they are as an individual. The fact that even his own father couldn't even decipher entirely who Justin was really portrays how teenagers nowadays can't even tell their own parents about how they feel. It makes me question if even Justin's friends were really his friends since he felt the need to, presumably, lie to them. This story was short, but it contained a sincerely thought-provoking message and presented a situation that many might not even know could be happening around them in real life.
I like how in this piece the Justin character develops as the story is being told then drops almost completely when it comes to the point where it is Justin's father rejects of questions what the groups of friends had said about Justin. Great Job! -Altierre Paris
Hector I really liked your story!! It showed me that young adults who are facing problems can't even express how they feel to their parents.
-Philip Ahn 5th
I am lost with words on how amazing your piece was. From the moment you emphasized the word normal by placing quotations, I had the idea that maybe he was another teenager that had the problems of not having the same confidence of what they would have at school. But then all these good things came up from other students that Justin was the smartest kid and he was a lady's man, so I'm here sitting, okay well he seems to live a pretty amazing "normal' life. Then you took a whole new turn at it by putting the focus on his father! WHOA! That was an astonishment! When the father started talking about his son and how contrasted he seems to be towards the eyes of the students, it had me ponder the question if Justin might have a disability? Oh, we must talk about this piece one day Hector. Good thing we have English together!
Keep Writing,
Jaena Lauren Fabia
Period 4
This story is definetly my favorite story! I like how its you did ike a total plt twist! I still would ike to know what kind of a guy Justin really is and like why is friends would say that he was smart and a ladies man if he was a above average student and not very outgoing with the girls? It totally caught me off guard when the speaker was his dad! Im kind of curious if Justin is still alive or not? I also loved the use of imagery i feel lie while i was reading this I could see it in my head! Great job! Please keep writing!
This was my favorite of the month. Really good look into just how well our parents do (more like don't) really know who we are. But you took a look at the deeper issue of how kids will lie to not seem so mundane. I really like how you approached writing this story. -Richie Gaspers Period 5
I like how you started off with different stories of "Justin." By giving different views on Justin, it made the story seem like a common occurrence in high school. Also, it can be related to a lot of student who have "multiple personalities." On a side note, the beginning of the story reminded me of TFIOS.
Many parents now a days dont truly know their own kids. Mainly because the kid is scared to show their true selfes or other reasons. This story really shows that by how Justins father is finding out that he didnt know justin as well as he thought he did
imalla ramirez
period 6
i really like this piece, mostly because you never really know whats happening to your friend or even best friend and especially child. i also liked how realistic this was compared to other stories. And this piece of writing was also great because of how you don't tell the reader what exactly happened to justin so we are left with wanting more.
-mariah rhodes
period 6
I thoroughly enjoyed this piece you had made Hector. I believe me and the character Justin have many similarities leading me to rather enjoy his personality. It is, also, a very interesting story about what some teenagers would do to gain attention and approval from his/her peers. It had more of a realistic story compared to others that i had read.
-Justin Presto
Period 6
i like how you wrote this story. the way you talked about his life and how his life is perfect.....the way that you explained who justin was at the beginning made me think that you already know everything about him but when i continued reading the story it made me feel like he is mysterious and when you said that the he was in his room and talking to himself and everything else it made me thing that he was just a lier or something. at the end when he says that he couldn't handle that perfect life it made me feel bad because it was all so perfect at the beginning. i like how the rising action is rising when his grades are dropping, when he talks to him self, and when he thinks that he cant get any girls. good job kid!
-william bema
-pd.2
Edit: I thoroughly enjoyed this piece you had made Hector. I believe me and the character Justin have many similarities leading me to rather enjoy his personality. It is, also, a very interesting story about what some teenagers would do to gain attention and approval from his/her peers. It had more of a realistic story compared to others that i had read.
-Justin Presto
Period 2
That was a great piece you wrote you explaining and raising the question of who is Justin ? It just pulled me in, great story !
I liked how you wrote this story and the way you basically talked about his life and who he is but there are many friends out there that want to show there friend like as being cool they don't want to say boring stuff about him in a memorable moment talk they want to make him sound cool and tell everyone that he is a cool kid and loves to do everything that shows how friends caring even though they are lieing they still care about there friend
Omid Raziani
I absolutely loved the twist at the end having the narrator be his father, throughout most of the piece I thought you were talking about Justin. I loved how relatable this piece was from the parent not even knowing who their child really is, for the pressure of lying overcomes one so they are not be looked down upon for your not doing as well as their peers. Good Job.
I find it cool how Justine is an enigma throughout the short story. I thought is was interesting how you left room at the end for an open ended interpretation about who the kid could potentially be. "Who was Justin? This is a question that I will never be able to answer." That line sent chills down my spine. I was surprised to say the least when I discovered the central message was one about suicide prevention. Incredibly well thought out story. Nice Job overall.
Jason Gonzalez
Per. 4
10/13/14
I've read many student written pieces on suicide and the creation of one's own identity. I don't think I've ever come across a piece that goes into detail for both subjects. I think you hit the nail on he head here: choosing to correlate one's self-definition. The character Justin intrigues me but I would have liked to see a little more expansion on who he really was and who he "said" he was. Maybe you meant to say that it didn't really matter because he dies in the end. Food for thought: are we the sum of our actions or the sum of our aspirations? I earnestly believe in the latter. Thank you for the thought provoking piece.
_Adan Chavez
Per. 4
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