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Sunday, November 16, 2014

"The Buzzer Beater" by Altierre P.



            The air was cold and I needed to concentrate. I had my gear on and I was ready for action. What was a game to me may be hell to other people. There were only two scenarios that that could end the game. I would either make the game-winning shot or miss to find me in a deep, dark place. With that in mind, I looked to my team one more time and said a prayer. It was time for me to make a play. I had to gather my courage once more even though I had done this millions of times before. The clock was ticking and and time was running out. With sweat running down my forehead and with steady hands, I went for the play. I had cut the blue wire diffusing the bomb with only seconds to spare. Being on the bomb squad was a very nerve-racking job. Although I had diffused many bombs before successfully, I can't help but to think that the the end of the game may be near.  I looked to my team and I gave the go-ahead to enter the building for I had just beat the buzzer and hit a three-pointer in the game of life once more.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your story was very interesting,I really enjoyed the imagery and detail you put in this story . Great Job

Valerie Perez
11/19/14

Anonymous said...

i totally thought that it was a basketball game. i was so caught off guard when u said "bomb squad". Great plot twist

Tommy McDonnell

Anonymous said...

Noah Martinez
p.2
In the beginning of the story it sounded like a basketball game but great plot twist.

Anonymous said...

You had me confused in the beginning but then it all clicked. Great story!
Josie Starr
period 2

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your story. You used a great source of imagery. Your piece of writing was great!
Jobelle Dauz
Period 2

Anonymous said...

This story was great! I liked the imagery that was used and how descriptive you were. -Tatiana Nunez

Anonymous said...

I was originally intrigued by the title. when i started to read i was very impressed by the imagery and then realized it was about a bomb squad. Good story and keep it up.
By jesse jauregui

Anonymous said...

Marian Hollinquest
Period 1
The story was a bit ambiguous in the beginning, I wasn't sure hat the setting or occasion was. When I read the title I thought this story was going to be about baseball for some reason. Anyway, I liked how the situation was characterized to be more like a game than a life-threatening situation.

Anonymous said...

Love the plot twist. At first I thought you were talking about a sport but it was actually a bomb squad. Nice work.
-Chiquitita Annisa

Anonymous said...

At first i thought is was going to be some sports story then i read bomb squad and blue wire. That really brought me back to the story and kept me reading, but i do like how you used sports as an analogy. Good job!!
Andrew Hernandez
Period 2

Jonathan Casas said...

I was mind-blown with how you made it sound like a basketball game at the beginning, amazing use of imagery.

Anonymous said...

Wow imagery was on point. I thought this was about a basketball game but I was wrong it was about a bomb squad.
~Clarissa Rojas
Period 2

Michael Hernandez said...

Wow plot twister that it was a bomb squad, I thought it was a sport. Good details as well. Keep it up.

Unknown said...

Very nice imagery. The whole time i thought it was about a basketball game. Great Story!

Joseph Mendez
per.2

Anonymous said...

I really like all of the detail and the suspense into the story. Great job. would love to read more.
P.6
Kyle Baker