"Lola" by Nathaniel A

      A flaw of the human condition is that goodbyes are inevitable. People try so hard to
extend the life of others to enjoy just a few more precious moments with them before these goodbyes arrive. For me, she had always been in my life. One of the first to see me, one of the first to hold me, one of the first to love me. My Lola (grandma in English) has always been a part of me, a person that I could not imagine life without. Thankfully, my Lola is still living, breathing, yet struggling with normal bodily functions. I had to say goodbye to my Lola, an event that felt as if she was moving on to the promised land.
     My Lola is quite the older individual, with eighty-three years in the counting. She was a normal grandma to say the least, making me my favorite orange juice shake every single morning, cooking me delicious chicken adobo and other Filipino cuisines when I come home from school, and giving me those types of hugs that no one can resist right before I go to bed. She had lived with me for almost an entire decade until the series of unfortunate events started to occur. Cousins from Florida losing their mother from a deadly car accident. Five year-old cousin from Canada suffering from lung cancer. Family members required care and thankfully, my Lola was the Wonderwoman to many by tending to their needs. Her absence from California was quite unfortunate, however, my innocent mind kept reminding me that she would come back home and that she would continue to be the great Lola that she was.

     Years passed as did the many messenger video calls until the year finally arrived when she returned home. Something wasn’t right. Fatigue, lack of movement, and worst of all, the persistent pain that always struck down upon her was a burden to her and the family. Activity became limited and life choices were no longer a convenience store of options. Nevertheless, restrictions never brought her down her morale. I would always see that same Lola smile along with those same Lola jokes. I was also able to find joy for the person that she still was, not sadness for the absence of the person she used to be.
     These moments didn’t last forever. As she left for Florida once again for yet another unfortunate death, her health upon her arrival at California was at an all time low. It would sadden me to see her try to take a bite of food for minutes without end, followed by an everlasting frown resembling the one from ​Coco​ at the end of the movie. I would even have to take laps around our pool table with her just to get the slightest bit of exercise, clutching to the back of her pants, supporting her, and praying that her knees will not give in and collapse. With these moments, I knew that she needed a life where she could receive care 24/7.
     Just a few months later, she was gone for good, this time not for the care of others, but for the care of herself. She went to Florida to see her doctor and go through her fourth surgery. The Philippines was her final destination as a financially feasible place to reside and to be taken care of for the rest of her life. I said my final goodbye to her, as if she was moving on to the afterlife.
I realized then that goodbyes to people are not based on whether or not their souls are in this world; they are based on whether or not the connections with a person are kept alive. Despite the drifts in our relationship, my Lola really was and still is one of the most influential people in my life, despite losing the identity I have learned to know and love. While she does not live with

me anymore, I still appreciate all the love and thought she has given, I still appreciate that she continues to breathe, and I still appreciate the wonderful person that she is through her care of family and herself. I was never able to see her again simply because of her body changing faster than my ability to travel and the lack of funds to do so. Today, I continue to enjoy the video calls that we do have, and her absence reminds me that I have to enjoy every single moment I have with people, young or old, because quite frankly, I do not know when goodbyes are going to arise, but I do know my Lola’s final goodbye to the rest of the world is soon to come.