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Thursday, February 22, 2024

"Sticks & Stones" by Madilyn R


 

It all started in Elementary School when I was in third grade, I was just 8 years old. From what I remember my elementary school experience was just like any other kids experience. Playing in the playground, running around at recess, doing all the things kids would do, except for me all that excitement turned into  my biggest fear in the third grade. One time when I was at recess a boy made a comment making fun of my appearance. I remember how I felt in that moment it was the first time I had ever experienced humiliation except I didn’t know exactly what that feeling was. Later that day during lunch the boy came up to me and made another comment about my hair, I walked out of the cafeteria to a pair of steps where me and my best friend would sit. When I got home later that day I cried in my room because I didn’t understand what happened. After that day the same boy continued to make comments about me and soon his friends and two girls in my class started to as well. I was very  clueless as to what bullying was and I remember being confused as to what I did to all these people to make them act so cruel towards me. There was a saying my mom told me everyday before she dropped me off at school and it was “Treat others how you would like to be treated.” Every time I would receive these mean comments I imagined my mom saying that phrase to me and it made me wonder what I did wrong. After a while the comments started to affect me and I asked my mom if she could start to straighten my hair and made the decision to start wearing new clothes. The next day I decided to wear my hair down, straightened, and I had no accessories in my hair. For my outfit I decided to just wear solid colored clothes instead of my usual bright colored shirts and pants. My mom started to notice a change I always loved to wear my hair in different styles with bows to match my bold outfits. I told my mom what had been going on and she confronted the school and the boy had gotten in trouble. After this interaction I thought things were finally going to change and for once in a long time I was excited to go to school again. Little did I know that the next day it had only made things worse. I had a best friend named Alya and she was the only person and school I had told these things to, and I found out she telling the boy everything I told her. This was also the first time I had experienced the feeling of betrayal. The next school year I had a new class and picked up a new hobby to keep myself distracted. I decided to join the band class my school offered and made some new friends along the way. The bullying still continued  but it wasn’t as severe ever since I had changed my appearance and tried to stay out of the way. Progressing through the year I started to adjust to the  bullying comments because I was tired of letting them get to me.  When I finished 5th grade I made the decision to go to a different middle school rather then the school that was recommended. I seen this as an opportunity for a fresh start and a way to start a new chapter in my life, and that is exactly what happened. I never experienced bullying or anything again. When I had joined that band class as an escape it lead me to learning 4 other new instruments and introduced me into a new passion and something I still love to do today. Bullying also helped shaped me as a person it made me into a  well built person. It taught me how to deal with my emotions,feelings and to not care about what others think or say. Although it came with many life lessons learned. Being able to go through such a difficult time at a young age helped me become a mature, and self sufficient growing up. Although the bullying had a major impact on me when I was younger I am grateful for all the things I learned along the way. Looking back now I wish I could give my third grade self a hug, and tell her that Senior year me now is doing so much better and nothing like that will ever happen again.

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