⚠️Trigger Warning⚠️ Death is discussed.
June 4, 2020. To you, the first of many dates you’ll lay eyes on. To most, a day like any other. To me, the day Heaven received another angel.
DEATH is a common fear that lurks in many―some more than others. Some allow this fear to completely encumber their livelihood, while others understand the natural essence of demise. It is everywhere. Grief, anguish, sorrow, pain, affliction, sadness, anger, misery; all pure and justified sentiments when death makes an appearance. Yet, we are so obsessed with death and society is practically desensitized. We celebrate life by viewing the lifeless remains of those we once laughed with, ate with, danced with, cried with. When a phone dies, you pull out a charger and charge it. When a candle dies, you simply relight it or replace it. When a beloved pet dies, you cherish the beautiful memories, grieve, and in many cases, find comfort in another playful companion! When a human being dies…
Carlos Ballon del Rosario: A family man. A holy man. A witty man. A wise man. A life. A death.
I am convinced that some are “blessed” with or “bestowed upon” a pass or 2, or 3...or 24. Maybe some are just lucky. Maybe some have cracked the code, or, just maybe, finally discovered the fountain of youth. Why a pass? A pass to what? A pass for what?
In 1946, 4th grade he climbs a guava tree to pick one of those delicious guavas bore on the graceful, swaying branches. Suddenly, he slips and has an uncomfortable trip down!
In a year unknown, a pickpocket raids him at the theater!
His teenage self was beaming with pride after his older brother gifted him a brand new Sheaffer ballpoint pen, during a visit to Quiapo with their father. As they got off the mini-bus, they were held up and he was, now, able to call that brand new Sheaffer ballpoint pen his, no longer. Not abnormal for 1949 Philippines.
Around the years of 1961-1962, the driver of the bus he is on falls asleep! The bus swerves and he veers towards the driver. It’s great he reacted quickly, or else his throat would have been impaled!
He and his wife, in their car, like a ragdoll, get dragged by a guard post in 1970!
Abdominal pain sends him to the hospital during a long day of work! Ruptured appendicitis does a number, does it not? His oldest son is worried to see him connected to an IV held together with nothing but medical tapes. Sounds like the 1970s.
In a forgotten year, he is crossing on Epifanio de los Santos Avenue (EDSA), and a bus full of passengers, unaware of his presence, rammed into the driver side of his car!
It is another day in another year, and the road is full of baha, or flooded water. Unfortunately for him, he is not watching his step and falls directly into a manhole!
He and his family are on their way back home after watching a broadway show in 1992. With his youngest son in the driver’s seat, he watches as the white car, up ahead, gets into an accident. His son veers into the center divider and the car is spinning airborne, much like trapeze artists!
It’s another year, and the screws of the tire he just changed are loose!
1993, and another car accident!
It’s the same year as the previous, and this time he is lucky. It is not a car, but rather a train that rams and drags him and his car.
1996, and his luck ends with another car accident!
A year unknown and a near-fatal car accident!
After attending his sister's wake (he does not have many siblings left) in October 2000, he leaves due to discomfort. Turns out he is having an abdominal aortic aneurysm!
It’s 2001 and South Fontana is not the safest place to be. While he walks to the ATM, a man, he thinks is his friend pulling a prank, holds a gun to his head. Him joking, the man butts him in the head, which is now gushing blood, and steals his wallet! He goes home.
2005, and another car accident!
His 2008 self is unable to avoid colon cancer!
Along with a quadruple heart bypass!
It’s 2009 and 24 inches of his large intestine is taken out!
It’s 2013 and his aortic valve replacement surgery!
Oh no, it’s 2019 and the car breaks aren’t working!
Apparently, his heart shares the same fate.
It’s 2020...he suffers a myocardial infarction; in simpler terms, a heart attack. He is dependent on oxygen. He is dependent on family. He is dependent on me.
He was my Lolo Carling.
This was his life…
18 comments:
Enrico this piece was intimate and full of beautiful catharsis. Your Lolo sounds like a truly wonderful person and I am deeply regretful to understand that you had to suffer that loss. Death is never a simple process as everyone that remembers them has to hold the guilt and grief, but by writing about it you've taken a huge leap towards the healing process so thank you for being vulnerable with us.
Wooww I just.... I am speechless to the point where I don't even know where to begin. This was so beautifully written, but you have always been an amazing writer ever since I met you. You really took me on a journey through your Lolo's life and I want to thank you for sharing this with us. I loved how you incorporated the years and I just have to say that your Lolo went through so much. Car accident after car accident... I am so glad Lolo had you and your family to depend on every step of the way.
I am so sorry for your loss Enrico! Your Lolo sounds like an amazingly strong man, he denied death so many times and continued to fight for himself and your family. He is looking down on you now, and I know he is so proud. He knows that all of his fights and survival, for so long, for his 25 lives, was worth it, so that he could be there and make the amazing family he did. Thank you for sharing your Lolo’s life story, it made me remember and appreciate the story of my own great grandfather. It sounds like Carlos Ballon del Rosario was an INCREDIBLY strong individual, with a trying but full life. It is clear his impact will be a lasting one. - Nicole Lillie
Hey Enrico! Thank you for sharing your Lolo's life. I know it has been hard for you, but I want you to know that you are strong. Please know that he is very proud of you and what you have/will become. Your Lolo was a very strong man and I'm sure he was happy to see you grow up to be the man that you are.
I absolutely love your writing style, and how beautifully you honored your Lolo. Every word had me completely immersed. Thank you so much for sharing his wonderful story, and for being so strong in discussing such a vulnerable subject.
Enrico,
I am so sorry about your loss, but this is one of the best pieces I have ever read commemorating a loved one. Your Lolo Carlos lived a difficult yet so resilient and strong life, and I am truly inspired by his preservation and continuous fighter spirit throughout his life. I am so glad that you introduced him to us, which serves as a constant reminder for the rest of us to be just strong and unbeatable like him. I hope the best for you and I am sure your Lolo Carlos is living well and good in another world and another life. Thanks for this piece!
Sincerely,
Zhenwei Gao
Wow,
Let me just start off by saying about how truly your Lolo really was, and how blessed you were to have him in your life so much. This story is absolutely remarkable, which truly gives a new meaning to "cheating death." The detail and description of each encounter where your Lolo stared death right in the eyes, and simply said "No, not today." is absolutely unbelievable. May his soul rest in peace and much love to you and your family.
-Jesse Ortiz
this piece was so beautifully written! i loved how you incorporated so much about your lolo it was so amazing enrico ! He sounded like an amazing man and an even more amazing grandfather !
I love the way you playfully tell the story of your Lolo cheating death. It captures his character and makes him seem like an amazing, blithe, strong man. I admire your relationship with him so much and I'm certain he's so proud of you. Bolding the name each year of an accident shows just how expansive and full his life was. This piece is so beautiful, as I'm sure your Lolo's life was.
This is really amazing, this story really captured the struggles your Lolo went through but how he "cheated death". I'm sorry for your loss and i pray he rests in peace and may your family and you find comfort.
This was really a well written and thought provoking piece. Showing the rather unlikely events of his life really makes one question if there could be something going on behind the scenes *wink wink*. Anyway, I had a great time reading this, it was heartfelt and yet still uplifting.
Ryan Mallon
Enrico, this brought me to tears. I am so so sorry for your loss, it is so obvious your Lolo was a strong man. His story was absolutely beautiful, I love the way you narrated these moments of his life. This piece was so so beautiful, intimate, and full of imagery. Amazing job <3 -gisselle flores
Enrico, this was a wonderfully touching and heartfelt retelling of your grandfather’s story. The narrative you crafted gave us a glimpse into the life of a man unknown to many of us. It allowed us to, for the whole of this piece, experience who this great person was. However, what truly made this stunning was how you framed your life in relation to his. You did not recount his experiences from the position of your emotions. You let his character and his experiences represent the uniqueness of himself as an individual. There is no more humanizing and honoring a remembrance. You did an exquisite job. Thank you.
Enrico I just want to say I am so so sorry for the loss of your grandpa I know he is resting well after his eventful life. The way you wrote this piece was so unique and beautiful. I can tell that you and your grandpa had a close relationship seeing how much you knew about his lifetime and the many times he cheated death. I hope you hold on to the moments you had with him. <3<3
It was so nice to hear this retelling of your Lolo's life and all the things he survived. It had me anxious with every new line, wondering what would happen next. I honestly thought this was going to be a story of past lives but to think he endured all this in just one lifetime is insane to me.
This was really beautiful and made me tear up just a bit. I lost someone really special to me too. I love that you are celebrating his life by sharing his story :)
Oh my gosh, Enrico! This piece was so beautifully written and I loved the way that you told the story in the most impactful moments of his life regarding his health. It truly showed how much your Lolo has overcome and how strong he was. The opening statement regarding June 4th, 2020 was so powerful and it gave me chills when I read it. Thank you for sharing this and I hope that you find comfort in knowing that he lived an amazing life despite of- and because of- his strength in the face of hardship. Beautifully done! -Estella Poirier :)
I almost started crying reading this. I also lost someone too. I can tell the bond you had with him. Great job and thank you for sharing this with us.- Muskaan Sandhu
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