"Freedom" by Betheni A

     Sophomore year. Yeah, even the word itself sounds ridiculous. “Sophos” meaning wise in Greek and “Moros” meaning fool. I guess you could say it was true, or at least in my case you’d definitely say it was fitting. Sophomore year: the transitory year between being a newborn highschool teenager or what we used to consider a “real” teenager back then at the age of 15, and the matured junior class. Not the kind you saw stuck in middle school P.E., the ones relishing in the fact that they were finally a foot taller than the rest of their peers who’d defined their entire universe as the space between the outlined chainlink school gates and the niche part of social media that the likes of “O2L” and One Direction inhabited. The age where you were stuck between, watching the real, responsible, independent, all-knowing “adults” of the upperclassmen focus on things like college and job applications. Sometime around April after about 6 months of driver’s education training and countless car rides where I wished my dad would just Let. Me. Drive. I had finally passed the test and got my license. Then I had an idea; I would convince my dad to let me borrow the car and I’d pick up any of my friends who weren’t busy and we would... do... something... or whatever. I’m sure you can imagine how that conversation went... Surprise! He said yes! Thirty minutes later and I was ready, no  We were ready to take on the world. With my friend Jacobo sitting in the passenger of my aunt’s 4Runner, and about a quarter tank of gas we set off into the winding roads of Inland Empire suburbia with nothing but a dream (the dream was having a working aux) and about an hour of daylight. The sun was

shining as we crawled past Windrows elementary and the falling leaves of the giant, swaying trees along the road. Cobo had Humble by Kendrick blaring out of his phone’s speakers on the dash and after a few minutes I had finally relaxed into what driving without supervision was like. We didn’t have anywhere to go , no plan or goal in mind. We were existing and seeing life pass by and passing life by at a cool 20 miles per hour. I did my best to keep my eyes on the road and away from my friend’s overly enthusiastic front-seat-restrained-by-a-seatbelt dancing. It felt so freeing and although we were in a metal death trap moving faster than we’d be able to run I felt safe and for the first time that year I saw a future for myself, a future where I could be on my own and be okay. Eventually we decided to drive to a gas station and look for an aux cord. The muffled iphone speakers were definitely not cutting it, and as we were both on this ride if we split on the aux we’d both be able to enjoy it. So we gathered up the crumbled dollar bills and loose change and walked out of the Chevron with a flimsy clearly-made-to-break cord but it felt like we’d finally got what we needed to make our sophomore adventure perfect. Turns out, we didn’t even know where to plug it in and by the time we found it it was time to go home. Although that aspect of our drive was completely anticlimactic it’s my favorite part of that day. I’d never been out of my house without supervision, without a ride to and from my destination, or without a detailed plan for what I was doing. I’m not sure if it was the fact that I was with one of my favorite people, if it was the weather and the birds chirping, or if it was the freedom of being in control of where I wanted to go and having the means to go there. At the time I didn’t realize it but I was creating one of my most memorable and favorite memories. That day I learned that spontaneity had a place in my life, that the best memories can be completely unplanned, and that I was happier when I was able to make my own decisions and experience the

world outside of my parents’ house. It was significant because from then on the way I viewed myself and what I was capable of, what I was capable of making my future into, no longer seemed like a fantasy. I waited 16 years to have that freedom, and if I held on there was only more of it out there to experience. Breathing was easier knowing there was a future me out there with only herself to answer to and the whole world to explore, I just had to wait a little longer to take that drive.