“Wings” Amitoj B

     A boy, so young, so free, dreamed about the world, on how open it can be. Ever so often,
he would float away into the clouds and look at his life from up above. He was happy, the happiest a twelve year old could be. The boy loved nature, so did his grandfather, hence why they got along so well. He wished that he could see him more often, but they lived on opposite sides of the world, making it harder for them to communicate. Some days, the boy’s grandfather would call him and they would spend hours telling each other new stories filled with excitement and full of imagination. He enjoyed his company and felt like he was always going to be there for him.
It was time for school, the boy woke up, got dressed, ate his breakfast, and wore his favorite pair of sneakers. The sneakers had a blue design with yellow-green lines stitched to it. It reminded him of the ocean, as if it were a drawing that had many dimensions within it. He laces up his shoes, sits down, and checks the time on his mother’s phone. He notices multiple missed calls and text messages. He opens the phone, wondering why someone would call this early, and as he’s reading the messages, he knew he had just lost a piece of his heart.
     As the boy grew older, he didn’t really know how to handle situations. He became reckless, thoughtless, and simply careless about everything. His shyness and quietness often turned into anger and aggression and he didn’t know how to control it or who to take it out on. It was as if he thought everything was alright, but deep inside he knew he was wrong and only hurting himself more.
At home, the boy was more comfortable with his family. He knew what things to tell them and what things he wanted to keep private. If he told his family too much, then they’d think he’s exaggerating or he needs attention. If he didn’t share anything at all, then they would question him if everything is okay or if someone did something to him. The problem was that he didn’t need any attention nor did he want to answer any questions, he just wanted everything to be how it used to be. Excitement, stress free, full of happiness: all those things he once had but now he barely has them and if he did, he has so little of it.

     Time and time again, the boy went through the depths of the ocean whenever he felt lost. Sometimes, he had no idea where he was and there were no signs of human contact near him. He was trapped in a whole other dimension by himself. At one point, he noticed that there was a dim light above him. It had a yellowish tint to it, and it had tiny rays of light shining down towards him. He thought it was a sign of hope, so he started swimming towards it but within a second, it was gone, and he slowly started to sink into emptiness.
     As the years went by, more tensions started to pile up and he felt like he was drowning and that there was no one there to save him. His mind was like a drawing made from a five year old with different shapes and patterns that had many scribbles on it and once you erase it, the marks were still visible, only this time it had no color. He was confused and alone and he didn’t know what to do, or how to react. The boy never knew how it felt to be all alone, even though at times he was scared thinking about it, he eventually got used to it and wasn’t affected by it at all. He always wondered about his life; how it worked in such a strange yet unique way? He didn’t understand how something so big and universal, came out. He wishes he could go back in time and change some of his memories, but he knew that wasn’t and would never be possible.
     He eventually reached the bottom, and his mind at this state of time was empty. The numbness took over his body, he felt nothing. He was breathing really fast, his heart was pounding, his eyes wandering, and eventually everything stopped.
     The boy woke up and went to the mirror. His world changed, he wasn’t himself anymore, he was no one.