"Echoes of Change: Dr. Yousef Sadiq" By Sahar S

 

Introduction

This profile is based on Dr. Yousuf Sadiq, a dedicated member of the medical community, with over fifty years of experience, who has devoted his entire life to his practice and those in need of medical care. While others regard him as a sophisticated individual, I have viewed him as a guiding figure. He is technically my great-uncle, but I view him as a grandfather. My grandfather, Ismael Sadiq, passed away when I was young, and my great-uncle (my grandfather’s brother) ensured that I would never feel the void of that loss. I can personally attest to Dr. Sadiq’s commitment to not only his family but his community and patients.

 

Early Life & Background

Dr. Sadiq was born in Kabul, Afghanistan, in 1949, where his passion for medicine was initially ignited. The war-torn country was not an ideal place for children to grow up. After witnessing tragic events occur to his peers, Dr. Sadiq concluded that the life he wanted to lead would be one to help others, not one steeped in harm and violence.

Originally, my grandfather and great-uncle were drafted into the Afghanistan army, and the two were willing to fight for their country, unaware of the great consequences that were to come. This experience was the motivation behind studying medicine. Dr. Sadiq explains that on the battlefield, his brother went out of his way multiple times to protect him, and Dr. Sadiq said that he never felt more helpless. Thankfully, both brothers were able to come home safe however unbeknownst to them, my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer. This course of events weighed on my great-uncle’s heart. This was the final push that encouraged his journey toward improving the lives of others.

Soon, he pursued education at the Avicenna State Medical Institute of Kabul and got married in the process. He had moved out of the house of my grandfather, but would consistently come to check on the health of my grandmother. Eventually, my grandmother had to go abroad to receive the necessary aid as she needed a specialized physician; This surgery saved her life, which reinforced his belief in the transformative power of medicine. Dr. Sadiq explains, “There is no career that resonates with me the way medicine does; This is not just a job, this is my passion.”

 

Education

Although Dr. Sadiq completed medical school, it was not an easy path. He had switched careers twice, once as a banker and then as an educator. However, his second career was over when he got drafted into the Afghanistan army. As explained above, there were many struggles when returning from war, not only the declining health of many family members but also the constant PTSD and dissatisfaction with life.

The Avicenna State Medical Institute of Kabul was a difficult school to get into. He had to pool money together and borrow loans, this grueling task was a major setback in Dr. Sadiq's life. During this time, he lived with my grandfather and grandmother; They happily took care of him and provided a space in their home until he decided to move out and get married himself. Dr. Sadiq says the many years of suffering finally proved to pay off; There was no greater experience than receiving his white coat.

 

Contributions

One of Dr. Sadiq’s biggest accomplishments lies in his practice which is located in Rialto, California. This institution has served patients in the Inland Empire for over forty years. Through his dedication and expertise, he can provide quality care to all patients, regardless of their limitations. He has admitted that he has provided his skills to many members of the community who lack proper insurance, free of charge. While this could be controversial, he has always been an advocate for access to healthcare services, as all individuals deserve to know of their current state of health and solutions to take care of themselves.

Additionally, Dr. Sadiq has mentored many young medical professionals. He describes how mentoring others is ideal for him; It combines his love for teaching and passion for helping others. This combination paves the way for other individuals in the healthcare field to continue the legacy of providing care to our community. By relating to the struggles of many individuals in our community, he can come from a place of understanding and influence young medical professionals to continue pursuing such a fulfilling career in healthcare.

Furthermore, Dr. Sadiq’s advocacy for healthcare accessibility has led to his many charitable endeavors. While most of his donations are international, many are aimed at improving the Inland Empire. He has and will continue to support both the UC Los Angeles School of Medicine and the UC Riverside School of Medicine as the schools align with his value of improving healthcare access and medical education. Dr. Sadiq says, “These donations are an investment. They will ensure future doctors do not have to worry about the financial burden of schooling as much as I had to.” It is clear to see that his unwavering commitment to medicine reflects the values of an individual who cares for the well-being of his community.

 

Conclusion

Overall, Dr. Sadiq has left a legacy behind, internationally and locally. Through his decades of service, he has worked tirelessly to improve the well-being of countless individuals. His direct involvement and donations in the medical field have played a vital role in enhancing the Inland Empire’s healthcare landscape. Dr. Sadiq’s qualities of compassion, resilience, and dedication will forever serve as a testament to the selfless service one person can provide for entire communities.

 

"The Reiterating Asystole " by Raelee T

                          

            Someone once told me that a single decision can save multiple lives. As a doctor in the ER, I’ve held this advice close to my heart. However, the repeating sound of an individual taking their last breath and the sound of the ECG flatlining has never been something I’ve been able to get used to. It’s something no one should ever get used to…

                                                                

             “Doctor, room 5’s vitals are going up, we need to operate as soon as possible!” the head nurse exhaled while catching her breath from running up the stairs.

            “Has her family signed the consent form?” questioned the doctor in a white lab coat, with hair gathered in a sloppy bun upon her head. The doctor wore a neutral expression on her face that hinted at exhaustion. After her question was answered she ran following the nurse to what I presume was the patient's room.

            Watching from afar I picked up my journal and began writing my observations on the people who flocked in and out of the hospital.

                                                        Three days prior 

“Detective Dece!” called my partner Ember, “A few witnesses have stepped forward regarding the death of Madame Chere. Would you like to talk to them?”

I jumped out of my chair and followed Ember to the town’s investigation center. As soon as we entered, we were met with a range of cries.

“Detective Dece! I’m so sorry about what happened to your aunt!” cried one of the village elders.

“I was told you have information?” I sharply injected trying to not sound as affected as I was.

“Yes, yes! The last person who saw her was the doctor who came down from the general hospital to perform health checks! I think it was…let me think,” she said with a pause. “She had long black hair and was wearing a red blouse with a white lab coat. Ahhh, yes it was Dr. Jia Moor!” she exclaimed, snapping her thumbs.

                                                               A week later

            “If I could, I would like to talk to Dr. Moor?” the detective asked while holding up his badge to the nurse.

“I’ll go get her right away!” the nurse stammered before walking backward into me.

“How can I help you?” I interrupted, reaching my hand out, “I’m Dr. Moor!”

            The detective shook my hand warily and directed me toward the empty office behind him. I quickly realized I was being accused of something when the detective's questions shifted to asking where I was the day of December the third and what I had given to Mrs. Chere. Funny as it was, even though I knew I was being accused I began to tune the detective out and instead took a good look at him. He had a stalwart appearance with lineaments that consisted of a sharp chin with dark eye bags under gleaming eyes. His hair was combed back in a false attempt to pull his bangs out of his face. He wore a loose black sweater on top of a gray shirt alongside black cargo pants. His voice was soft and all too nice sounding for his job description. I noticed that he appeared aggressive and even agitated at my quietness.

“Are you listening?”

His voice broke my thoughts as I was confronted with his black pearly eyes.

“To be completely honest with you I don’t even remember where I was yesterday,” I softly chuckled trying to regain my composure and retain my dignity simultaneously. “From what I remembered I administered a diuretic for hypertension as Mrs. Chere was having heart difficulties.” While stating so I picked up the file with my patient's information and flipped to Mrs. Chere’s medical chart.

“Here is everything else noted about her health.” I asserted, handing him the information. I checked my watch and was hit in the face with the harsh reality that I needed to get back to work.

“If there isn’t anything else I need to get back to work! If you need any more information for the case, here’s my number,” I insisted, giving him my business card. “It was nice meeting you!” I smiled and slipped out of the room nearly sprinting to the nearest nursing station.

            “Are you being accused of murder!?” was the first question I was attacked with as soon as I came face to face with the head nurse.

            “Right now they can’t confirm anything until the autopsy comes back.” I sighed while running my fingers through my hair. Another issue to handle I thought tirelessly.

                                                              

            The autopsy report was finally out. I walked gingerly to the anonymous building that contained the autopsy room. I shivered while I pushed open the tall door and inhaled the poignant scent of the cleaning agent.

            “Based on the report she passed away from complications with the heart,” confirmed the pathologist.

            I nodded and asked, “Could this be a source?” lifting a bag with a needle and liquid inside.

            The pathologist took the bag and stated, “Let me take a look.”

Once she came back the results left me with further suspicions.

They echoed in my head, “This medicine is normally administered when individuals have heart complications. Yet it appears that the needle has been tampered with considering it has never been used on a human…”

                                                             

            I waited by the old structure, listening to the direction of the wind and the sound of birdsong filled with regret and shame. Then my subject of interest walked into the room with a gust of purpose. He stormed to his car and before I could run up to him, drove away.

            I sighed and returned to the general hospital with reluctance.

            “Any new information on the case?” asked one of the nurses who worked closely with Dr. Glace, a rival doctor of mine.

            “No. Tell Dr. Glace if she has any questions to ask them herself!” I snapped, thinking of all the times she had sent her minions to spy on me.

            “Doctor! Doctor! The patient in room 2 is having a cardiac arrest!” the head nurse shouted, pulling me to the patient's room and away from my truculent thoughts.

                                                            

            Another death in three weeks can’t be just a coincidence. This could be either murder or medical malpractice and both will lead to no good outcomes. I pondered while looking through the reports I’ve obtained so far about the cases.

            The autopsy results displayed that the three patients all shared three things in common. An injection point that had a purple bruise surrounding it, potassium chloride in their systems and the fact that they all were once patients of Dr. Moor.

            But why would Dr. Moor have any reason to kill her patients and why would she administer medicine so harshly? “All evidence points towards Dr. Moor but why do I have a strange feeling that there is something wrong…” I muttered under my breath, trying to construe the situation to no avail.

                                                          

“I heard that an old patient of Dr. Moor’s was injected with potassium chloride!” gossiped the nurses in the back of the room. With a forbearance like no other, I ignored them and continued suturing my current patient's wound shut.

After completing my rounds, I returned to my office with my head down. I didn’t have the sanguine attitude that I usually paraded around and didn’t feel quite well. Coincidently, I turned the corner and slammed head-first into the detective.

I ushered him into my office not wanting anyone else to gossip about my further troubles. With no time to waste, he began talking about updates in the case.

“Do you know anyone who would have any motive in harming your recently deceased patients?” 

I shook my head and mumbled, “At this point, I’m used to being accused.”

“What was that?” he asked.

“Nothing. I’m just confused about why I’m being accused of killing my own patients…” I replied.

“While for starters, all the patients that have been murdered hold relations to you. The increase in deaths of your patients should be a concern for you as well. Is it not suspicious that you haven’t taken a day off work or done anything about being accused?” He retorted back.

I began to laugh, “Death is a normal occurrence for me…people can die at any moment and when they do it’s normal for a family member to accuse and press charges.” I thought to myself it would be nice to be able to save everyone but not all doctors wear capes.

Detective Dece must have noticed my reserved feelings for he stood up and simply murmured, “I’ll get to the bottom of this.”

His presence had left me with what felt like a cardiac arrest of my own, I began to tear up and in my head heard the sounds of the flatlining while my eyes closed. You might as well be as guilty as the murderer it seemed to reiterate.

When I finally awoke from my nightmare, it was too late. I was not the savior I was trained to be.

 

"Travels with Vermilion" by Sadie P

Getting my first car was a freedom and privilege that I could not have appreciated more with my life; I would assume it's like that for every teenager getting their first car. It was a 2002 Grand Marquis Mercury, and its color depicted that of a profound cherry red. The whole build of the car is almost similar to a boat, for it is prolonged and wide. My dad purchased the car for me in January 2024. In February, I got my license, and I was driving around town with my one-of-a-kind car. I took the car to school, job interviews, and anywhere else I could think of. Additionally, I took pride in that vehicle. Everyone told me that the car embodied me as a person. That connection between my car and me provided much more importance towards it being in my life. With that, I named her Vermilion. A noun that can be defined as “a brilliant red pigment made from mercury sulfide.” Mercury, like the brand of my car. Red, like the color of my car. What a fitting name!

I cared deeply for Vermilion. Every single week I took her through the car wash; I took delight in keeping her clean. “A clean car is a happy car,” my dad always told me. I never imagined myself as materialistic, but I cared about that car as if it were a person. Vermilion was there for me during my most excruciatingly painful months of 2024; how could I not take great care of her? In April 2024, Vermilion was with me when it felt like there was nobody by my side.

—

During this time, I was lost at sea in a relationship where I was not being appreciated, and I was idolizing this partner rather than focusing on my own happiness and something of a greater nature. I broke my back in several different places to even attempt to keep them happy; I carried that relationship with my own love and free will. Yet, they always made it a point that they felt forced to reciprocate the actions and services I provided them. It’s disappointing how they made me feel like I was just a chore or a bill to them. I know I treated them with my best efforts, so why were they so careless with me? Maybe I treated my car so well because it’s what I longed for in that relationship of two and a half years. Needless to say, that relationship came to an unpleasant end at my junior prom. As expected, Vermilion took me home that night. I’m not sure where I would be if I couldn’t rely on her.

—

As summer of 2024 began, that’s when I made a vow to move on from that relationship. I have since then forgiven my past partner, but I did not feel as though they belonged in my life anymore. Most importantly, I had Vermilion; she was the most reliable to me. I spent the whole summer with her! She escorted me to pool parties, shopping trips, and my summer courses. I went to beautiful coastal cities with her, Santa Barbara down to Ventura. We took the California State 1 highway, and we rolled alongside the glistening iridescent waves that crashed into the sand. I took her to the places I loved as a way to express my gratitude for her transportation duties. Eventually, I completely forgot about the pain from the months prior because I was having such a delightful time with my Vermilion.

During the summer as well, I had gotten a new tint on the windows of Vermilion. The windows were so dark, I had to have been looking into an abyss. I was told to be extra careful driving at night because of it.

Summer break eventually came to an end. With August, that meant school was starting back up again. Starting my final year of high school, I was anxious about my workload. This school year, I knew it was going to be such a drastic change from that of my previous years because of: higher-level classes, clubs I would be running, and finally getting hired at a job for the city.

—

 At this point, I was getting too comfortable with Vermilion; moreover, I began to get busier by the second because of the workload I gave myself. I was taking her to the car wash less and less, so the dust and bird poop began to pile up. The inside began to fill with food receipts and empty water bottles. I was heavily concentrated on needing to go home to do my homework, needing to drive to City Hall to get paperwork done, needing to stop and get food, and needing to do this and that. I was so busy I couldn’t even stop to think about what the task at hand was. Alas, Vermilion was doing her very job and transported me everywhere I needed to go. I had always been grateful for her duties, but I got careless.

—

August 14th, 2024, I had just gotten off work around 8:30 PM. My job tasks consist of heavy lifting since I work at an event center. The shift made my body so sore that my limbs felt like TV static. Not only that, my last meal was around noon that day; how careless of me to not eat and keep my energy up. Regardless, I believed it was fine, because I was driving to pick up food for my family and me to eat for dinner!

I never made it to the restaurant. In fact, I never made it out of the neighborhood my work facility was located in. I’m not sure if it was because of the time, the dark tint on the windows, or my exhaustion after my shift (maybe all those factors), but I fell asleep at the wheel. I awakened to a hefty jerk and thunderous bangs as Vermilion hopped onto the curb. In my confusion, I couldn’t brake quickly enough. Before I knew it, I trimmed a road sign and a fire hydrant. HOW could I be so careless? I was aware of my drowsiness and inability to drive, but the ambition to get dinner and drive home overwhelmed me.

My heart fell to the pit of my stomach; I just crashed Vermilion. The driver door wouldn’t open, so I exited through the passenger door. Upon getting out of the car, there it was: a 50-foot geyser of water from the broken fire hydrant. Looking back now, it makes me giggle, but in the moment I was mortified. I called my dad, “Dad, I fell asleep at the wheel. I ran over a fire hydrant. Water is shooting up into the sky. I’m so sorry, Dad. I didn’t mean to.” He sighed and asked me exasperatingly, “Where are you?” I told him where I was, to which he said he was on the way and would contact the police for me. I felt no obligation to weep because it was unnecessary to pity myself for being absent-minded; disappointment was the only thing running through my veins. I never anticipated myself to be so careless, yet I was.

—

It’s been a few months since I last had Vermilion; the accident happened mid-August, and it is currently October/November as I write and revise this. The good news is that Vermilion was not badly hurt. As my dad fixes her for me, the cost to repair her is about $600. Therefore, I know my story with her is not over yet. Over the past couple of months, she has missed out on my achievements. Since then, I won homecoming queen in September, and I’ve been helping greatly at my job and school clubs. Since early October, I’ve been focusing on my religious growth through catechism. To end the list, I now find myself in a relationship with someone who treats me with the utmost love and respect.

In a single year, I was able to encounter myself being the one not being cared for and later on being the one who was careless. I’ve learned that being careful is a necessity in order to maintain pleasurable things in my life, while also acknowledging that I need to be treated with care as well. With Vermilion getting repairs and hopefully soon coming back to me, and my blossoming relationship with a respectful and gracious person coming into play, one would expect that I will be attentive with the way I treat them and anything else nice in my life.

 

 

“Summer with Vermilion” July 2024

Thankful for Our November Writers!

 All Students:  Be sure to read the entries for this group --November writers).  Everyone is required to comment on at least THREE different pieces of writing.  You must submit comments on Canvas (for each one, include the name of the author and the title of their piece, and then your positive, specific comment ) by Friday, November 6 on Canvas.

 

 

 

 

Remember, comments must be positive, original, personal, supportive, constructive, and SPECIFIC.  No "Good Job!" comments, unless you follow that with specific things you thought were done well in the piece.  Show them you actually took the time to read and enjoy their work!

"The Being" by Odessa S

 

The light of my phone caught my attention, with the first thing I saw being the date, which was January 11, 2023. Opening my notifications to figure out what the cause of my phone turning on was, I was puzzled to discover that it was a text message from my mom. Usually I wouldn’t pay any attention to my notifications during class, but my mother doesn’t regularly text me during school, so I figured it had to be something important. The voice of my French teacher faded in the background of my mind as my eyes shifted from left to right, scanning the message my mother sent to me. It read:

            Something happened to Grandma, and I drove her to the hospital with Grandpa.

After reading the vague message, worry gripped my throat, suffocating my airways, as my mind traveled to a dark place. No, no, no, it’s not her time yet. It can’t be. The school bell rang throughout my ears and my body clicked to autopilot. It took me out of the classroom and outside to walk to my next class. In the sea of students I caught sight of my friend, and she immediately knew a dark cloud had taken over my countenance. She was making her way towards me, but my body continued on its path, while my mind remained blank. She caught up to me.

“Are you okay?” her words echoed in my mind spurring me back to life. Those words, the cause of the river of tears that flooded from the depths of my eyes.

“My grandma. She has to be okay,” the only words I was able to choke out beneath the hysterical sobs escaping my mouth and finding their place in the embrace of my friend.

- - -

The rest of the school day passed as a blur, with my mind held captive by immense worry. By the time the last school bell rang, I braced myself for the bad news my mom would tell me when I would enter her car. The walk to the car always felt long, but it felt even longer today. The trees around me were as dead as a corpse, and the sky around me was a dark cloud of ash. Eventually, I arrived at the car and settled in the passenger seat.

“Grandma had a little episode earlier today, but she’s fine now. I just left the hospital not too long ago. Grandpa had said that he left her in the living room alone for a few minutes, and when he came back her body was paralyzed on the couch. He said her head was cocked back on the couch, looking up to the ceiling. He tried to shake her out of her trance, but nothing worked. He thought she was dead or possessed. Both Grandma and Grandpa are still at the hospital, and the doctors are going to have to keep Grandma overnight to run some tests and figure out exactly what happened, but they don’t think it’s anything serious,” my mother explained to me.

Relief overcame me, and I could finally breathe again. She’s okay, everything is okay.

            “I have to go back to the hospital to pick up Grandpa and take him back home. Do you want to come with me and see Grandma?” my mother inquired.

            “Yes,” the word escaped my mouth. Little did I know of the horrors I would soon witness at the hospital that night.

- - -

The moon illuminated the quiet hospital, as I stepped through the wide doors with my mother. The strong smell of soap and gloves attacked my senses once my feet crossed the threshold. I’ve always hated the smell of hospitals.

            My mother and I consulted the front desk and, soon enough, we were traversing the hallway leading to my Grandma’s room. The sound of nurses scurrying around the building was loud in my ears. Or was that my footsteps?

            We entered the cramped hospital room, and there she was. It’s difficult to put into words just how odd it felt, seeing my Grandma in that state; with different tubes and cords attached to her arms and chest. It felt like I was looking at a completely different person. Maybe I was.

            “Hi mom, how are you doing? I brought Odessa with me because she wanted to see you,” my mother told Grandma as she took hold of her hand.

My Grandma studied my face and a perplexed look overcame her countenance.

“She’s your granddaughter,” my mother informed her while pointing her finger at me.

            My own Grandma doesn’t remember who I am. It felt like a punch in the gut. Maybe we really have lost Grandma.

            “Is she with them?” my Grandma whispered to my mom, a look of fear spreading across her features.

            “With who?” my mother asked.

            “The people hiding. These people are here, hiding in this room. Ask Maria, she’s the housekeeper. She knows they are trying to kill me,” my grandma uttered, fearfully glancing about the room and gripping my mother’s hand.

            “Mom, there’s no one else here,” my mother reassured her.

            At that point, I didn’t know how to react. I was mostly scared as I stood there in that tiny hospital room, staring at this person wearing my Grandma’s skin. What happened to Grandma? My Grandma, the sweet, caring old lady I always knew was frantically trying to rip off the cords and tubes attached to her. My mom called for doctors, and they rushed in. It took 4 doctors to hold her down. I know not where all my Grandma’s strength came from, but it seemed to be enhanced by paranoia. She kept rambling about people trying to kill her and that she needed to fight the demons holding her down. As I watched the battle between the doctors and my Grandma, I just felt desolate.

- - -

            My Grandma had to stay at the hospital for two additional nights. By day, my Grandma was herself, but by night she became a different person. Each night her paranoia worsened and I was there to witness it all. When she got discharged from the hospital the Being that seemed to overtake her body faded away. My Grandma could remember who I was again. However, witnessing her episodes those nights at the hospital made me recognize the reality of aging. As my Grandma gets older, her mind only worsens. When will the time come when that Being comes back to permanently overtake her body and wear her skin? I wish it wasn’t inevitable, but she is already experiencing the onsets of dementia, and it will only proceed downhill from here. While my Grandma still recognizes me and those around her, I will go out of my way to make the most out of my time with her. I will tell her I love her everyday. I will hug her and laugh with her before the Being rips her away from me, never to return her.

 

           

           

"Best friends forever" by Nikhenidi B

 

Best friends forever we say. 

Growing up I had a best friend named Maddox who lived right next door to me.  Everyday afterschool we would go to each other's houses since we didn't go to the same school. We spent so much time together just having fun being right next door. We would play video games, make musicallys , go swimming and try new things together. We would even ride our scooters together and play hide n seek around the houses. We created so many memories together that I'll never forget.  Like one time I had gone to his aunt's house for St Patrick's day and at the time I was not a big fan of dogs let alone big ones. Maddox's aunt had a big German shepherd and for most of the day it was put away but it ended up coming out and came straight to me. The first thing I did was scream and then I ran around the house. I then hopped over his brother who was in a wheelchair, hopped over the couch and landed in his Grandma's lap. At the moment I was shaken up but his family and friends found it so funny that I was running from the dog, but looking back at that moment I do laugh and find it funny. After that day Maddox and I laughed about that moment for a good minute. That was a core memory that we shared together and that I won't ever forget. After spending so much time together a change had come and it was me having a best friend to not having one at all.  Maddox had told me that he was moving and I was so shocked and surprised since we lived so close to each other for a while. I knew that once he moved we wouldn't be as close anymore which saddened me alot. I remember just feeling so betrayed and hurt by the situation that we would not see eachother no more. Not long after he told me that he was moving he moved to a different part of vegas and my family and I moved back to california. So after he and I moved we lost connection and never spoke again. This loss made me realize and  reflect on the impact Maddox had on me. I realized that friendships require growth and change, and not all of them will last forever. With that change, I grew. I grew to learn how to handle losing friendships by accepting that people will come and go in my life but will leave behind important lessons. I grew to understand that not every friendship is going to last forever, and that's just how life is. So even with the sadness and loss, I continued to be positive and started focusing on myself. Losing a best friend  helped me to look forward and not only that but that I can continue to build great  bonds and connections with others, but it’s important to take time to focus on personal growth. In addition to that, looking back, I realize that I had to have this experience so that I could  understand the value of friendship and the significance people will have on my life. Maddox was my first real friend, and when we lost our genuine friendship and connection, I had to learn to move on and not dwell on that connection.  It wasn’t easy to go through but it taught me in order to grow sometimes you have to let go. This experience has helped me know the values of friendships and also understand the essential personal-growth in times of loss. Throughout this story it shows not just the challenge and sorrow I faced but also the growth that came with losing a true and genuine friendship. I became more selective and aware about who I become friends with and who I let into my life  because I realized how valuable true friendships are. What I learned from this experience and what I hope others learn is that not everyone in your life is there forever, and that’s something you have to accept. Take it and grow, don’t get stuck in the past. Instead focus on what you learned from the experience and how you can continue and grow with moving forward. It’s a part of life that everyone goes through, and it’s important to remember that change is going to happen and there's no stopping it. And knowing that, I will always remember the memories I have with Maddox, to move on but not forget.

"The month it all changed" by Maya G

It is September 2024, I am 17 years old, a senior in high school and I am moving from my basically childhood home. I moved here from my actual childhood home which is in Baldwin Park, I was about 9-10 so it didn’t affect me that much at the time but now I am moving out of my home that I have grown up in and found myself in. Which I would later find would be an overwhelming change but ultimately brushed this emotion away. My parents told me we were to move to a nice house that would be perfect since I would have my own room, which has always been a dream of mine since every house that we have lived in, I have always had to share my space with my two sisters. Nevertheless, they said we were moving and I was actually excited for this new chapter in my life.

Then my world came crashing down. The house we assumed we would move into actually had someone else living in it and had scammed us of hundreds of dollars. I have never felt more hopeless. It is October 2024 and my little sister and I are staying with a close family friend while my parents stay at our grandmother's house all the way in our old home town of Baldwin Park which we could not stay at since we go to school here in Rancho Cucamonga. Because of this fact, I have had to take on the challenge of taking care of my little sister all by myself really, with my parents not being able to come over all the time with work and not being able to afford gas. My sister is not an easy person to take care of when she doesn’t listen or just wants to be lazy. We haven't always gotten along which is sometimes my fault. But I believe we have gotten closer because of this but I feel miserable because of the fact that I am growing up, going to be an adult in less than a year and going to be moving out, leaving her to herself in the house of our parents. We don’t always get along with our parents the way other kids do. 

It is November 2024 and having to take care of my sister, making sure she eats, showers, cleans up after herself, having to take her to practice, school and taking her to hang out with friends,  all while trying to take of myself in the process really made me struggle with myself mentally, putting me in an unstable amount of stress and I found myself sinking into a deep depression feeling like a burden wherever I went, feeling like no one wanted me and having a hard time coping with the situation at hand. Even if people tried to lift my spirits, I couldn’t listen. My mind was stuck in this mindset of forever darkness. I knew I could not continue like this if it was damaging my relationships with the people closest to me, so I turned to something I have not been fully a part of since I was a child, which was my religion.

My family and I are christians, we used to go to church every wednesday and sunday but stopped going once we moved here because of the distance making it hard to keep up with this routine. So once we moved here we never found a church to join and gradually stopped going to church all together. Though I occasionally attended church, either with my friend to their church or I went with my aunt to her church but ultimately never really made time to go as often as I should’ve. I still prayed here and there but eventually lost faith little by little and the situation I am in did not help and I even began to feel anger towards God, frustrated by the situation I found myself in, as if I was being tested beyond my limits. But I ultimately decided to reconnect with my religion because I needed something to believe in and hold on to and I knew that even if I was angry with God, that he would help guide me through this. I went and bought a bible that I knew I would like and keep with me. Though it was a slow start getting into, it helped me ground myself with the fact that I am living a life that no friend of mine could imagine living. I am living the impossible.

This situation that I had and am still going through is a very complicated one. It has ultimately taught me many things and even though I am not out of it, it has taught me that the real world is a very scary place, especially the adult world. Having most of the responsibilities of an adult without being an adult is a very confusing line, not knowing if what I am doing is crossing that line or not. I have also learned that I have to be more responsible, that my time as a kid is coming to an end. One of the most important lessons I have learned is that life can feel like a repetitive, dull cycle without something to believe in. If I didn’t find something to hold on to, like religion or friends, it would be hard to see the meaning in everyday struggles and changes. Through it all, I have realized that no matter how difficult life may seem, having something to believe in makes the life I am living just a little bit more bearable and occasionally hopeful for the future.

"Nature Heals!" by Sadie O

 

There was once a time that I didn’t care for nature, in fact I utterly despised it. When I was a child I often got hurt, whether it was falling on the rough gravel that left me with scars or the irritating stains from wet grass. I never once looked at nature with whimsy, only petty annoyance. During quarantine my family would force me to do these hikes on a hill, I suppose to get some fresh air since we were only ever indoors. However, this only entertained my displeasure with nature as I would often get lightheaded (almost passing out) from these trips and the scenery was, to put it kindly, bland. Once I grew older I stayed indoors more and I was more pleased with a cityscape than a landscape. I often dreamt of living in a busy city, and whenever I visited Los Angeles my eyes would sparkle with the city lights. Until one day, me and my friend were walking, trees clapping their hands and a slight breeze that made everything feel perfect. My friend always saw the beauty in nature, she would often take pictures on her phone to capture a scene and I would wait for her impatiently. “Why don’t you be more whimsical?” She told me. “I don’t really care for nature.” I would say, but there was doubt in my answer. I too saw the beauty of the evergreen before me and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I’ve ignored the beauty of nature for so long, not once did I look back on the colored leaves on the ground or the way the rock glistens with sparkling water. It only served as a backdrop to me, like a painted scene of a play. Not once did I admire the details of the world. I’ve always liked the extreme parts of nature, like forest and beaches but I never appreciated the everyday trees and grass I walked by each day. My friends help me pause and admire the small things in life. We would walk out to a field just to look at the evening sky or a gazebo and pick at the white roses or furthermore, go to the park during the night and prance around the dewy grass and trees. No longer do I mind the grass stains nor the scars from the gravel that have faded long ago. Whilst I walk upon the cracked sidewalk I admire the bright vigorous flowers, the cracked leaves that crunch whenever I step on them, the blue mountains that stare at me wherever I go. I can’t shake the feeling of the simple pleasure of nature, like nothing else matters in the world. Nature is something that brings unity, peace and restoration of the soul. If ever I have a bad day or something bothers me, I would now go outside and appreciate the things around me instead of dwelling in my gray room. The light breeze hitting the long grass calms me, the flowers growing on the vines give a faint reminder of growth and life and the sunlight that shines through the leaves gives me a sense of hope, a truly inspiring home we live in. I learned to appreciate everything around me, even if it wasn’t the prettiest, the smallest thing would be beautiful to me. Whether it’ll be a simple meadow to an enchanting forest I see the beauty of it all. One day my father gave me a small red flower, normally I would leave it out by my window and watch it slowly die cruelly but I had a strange ambition to keep it alive. I would water it, talk to it and leave it in the sun in order for it to grow and after some time the once small flower grew into multiple. I never knew nature could be so rewarding, it even gave me a sense of pride and it only furthered my wonder and engrossment of nature. The cityscapes that I once adored seemed to be missing something, although I still find the beauty in the skyscrapers and the shining city lights, it didn’t always capture a certain charm that nature carries. Nature is something that we are always familiar with and once we see the resemblance of the simple evergreen of the Earth, it is comforting to us. I now see the world more differently than I ever have before. Once oblivious to the face of nature and I would pass on by without a care, unaware of the significance and wonders of the Earth I now have opened my eyes to the enchanting beauty of our world.

 

                       

"James the Rabbit" by Nathan R

 

“Although it’s difficult today to see beyond the sorrow, may looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow.”

August 14th, 2024, the day my beloved pet rabbit, James, passed away. Ever since I was in 4th grade, we had a pet rabbit by the name of James. Around the time we had gotten him, our family was going through a lot of issues. My parents had just recently gotten divorced and we were struggling. My father wasn’t a very good guy, I never really knew this until my Senior year. I had always seeked validation from him without knowing the things he had done. Senior year summer he had told me over the phone that he would rather have me go to parties, smoke, drink, etc instead of being a nerd and a loser; so you can tell what type of guy he is. Anyway, because of my parents divorce we had to move from Pico Rivera to Fontana; I had moved a few weeks before the end of 5th grade. James was with us the entire time as well, we moved houses 3 times and he was still the amazing little guy we all loved.

On August 14th 2024, I had gotten out early from school. I don’t remember why but I just remember not being at school that day, at around 1:30pm I heard my mom yell across the house. I ran over to see what happened and I saw her standing by my rabits cage screaming “James is dead” repeatedly. It was just her and I, and I had to do something so I tried to do what I could. He was laying behind his cage, not moving. I grabbed gloves and tried to pick him up, this is when he had started frantically moving. He was hurt and I wasn’t sure what to do, I had to support his neck with my other hand, he was really floppy. Eventually I would sit him in my arms outside, where he was slowly closing his eyes. My mom and I decided to take him to the vet to put him down, we didn’t want to see him suffer any longer. Before that, we took him to my older sister's work so she could see him one final time. The tears and sound of my sister's voice had caused me to begin to cry, the entire time I wanted to be there for my mom and make sure she was ok. The scene of the entire scenario was so heartbreaking that I don’t want to describe it anymore. Eventually we took him to the vet, to put him down, his breathing slowing, and his eyes closing. The veterinarian had eventually come in, and as we were saying goodbye, she had said “Good job buddy”, to my rabbit, for living and fighting for so long. It was at that moment, where I began to sob. I have only cried like that twice in my life, once when he had passed and the other around the end of September. Even though the entire situation was haunting, I felt it could’ve been worse. Thankfully I was randomly at home that day, thankfully my mom was checking on him, thankfully he didn’t suffer for long. There are a lot worse things that could have happened, but thankfully I was there to give our little guy a proper goodbye.

We were given the opportunity to cremate our beloved bunny. We had accepted it and chose the nicer option. Upon waiting a few weeks, we had gotten our rabbit's ashes and can finally say, he was home again. We were also given a farewell poem, the  poem had read, “Although it’s difficult today to see beyond the sorrow, may looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow.”

 

This poem had made me reminisce on our experiences with James, and what eras of our lives he has lived through. I had realized that he had been there for me through all my changes. Once I had gotten to a point in my life where I was happy with who I was, he had passed away. Me and my family like to think he was there to help us heal from the dark times, like an angel…because, once my entire family and I were all happy for once, he had passed away.

 August of this year was a special time for me, there were a lot of ups and downs, but if it weren’t for the people who were with me at the time, I’m not sure where I would be today. His death was really hard on us, however, it was his death that had reminded all of us of the people we had become today.

I write and tell this experience because mourning is a really hard thing to go through. However, it isn’t the idea of them being gone we should remember them for, instead we should remember them for the happy moments we had with them.

I had once heard that, only things you had cared for can make you sad or upset, but it was those same things that made us once happy. It is a really nice saying that I remember and think of often, because even though we miss someone or something, those same things had once made us happy.

 It is because of that, I remember those who had passed or had gone out of my life, with only love instead of bitter and hate. Love those who are in your life, love those who aren’t in your life. Forgive those who hurt, forgive those who hate, and most importantly, live everyday with love, respect, and gratitude. Thank you for taking the time to read my story, I hope you had something to take away from it, stay blessed. <3

♡ Rest In Peace James the Rabbit, August 14th, 2024 ♡