"The Blue Door" by Rauhl M

      In life, we grow up experiencing new things and events that change our lives and gives us
a chance to tell a great story. Some are good but others may be bad, but it also depends on if people they tell believe in it enough to take it seriously. There are many myths and legends that have us question if they truly exist, but a lot of times it’s more believable if someone experiences it for themselves. What draws listeners attention is the thrill or suspense that the story gives them and can lead a hunt for the answer. Sometimes the decisions they make are from temptation and can be either good or bad.
     It’s been months since a high school student named Valerie Chambers went missing. Her disappearance mostly impacted four of her closest friends Celeste, Jordan, Ryan, and Madison. They always wondered what happened and started to question that if they would have believed her then maybe they could have helped. A month before Valerie went missing, she always spoke of seeing a tall blue door that she’d see wherever she’d go. It was never open. All that stood out was a white light that was seen around the door and the mysterious dark figure standing next to it just waving. She never wanted to believe that it was all real or even get to close as she was afraid what happen and what would be on the other side of the door. Whenever she told someone they’d take it as a joke, including her closest friends. She found it normal for Jordan who’s known for being a jock and only believing in the stuff he saw for himself unless it was his girlfriend Celeste who he had a soft spot for and who everyone loved for how compassionate she was. Ryan Who mainly focused on school and didn’t pay much attention to what was going on as he found it irrelevant to him going to Harvard. Lastly, there was Madison who was Valerie’s best

friend and who believed her at first but thought moving on and ignoring it would be the best thing to do.      The four friends carried this burden for months, but suddenly one member of the group seemed off. It was as if she completely forgot Valerie even existed. Celeste was confused when Jordan, Ryan, and Madison were talking about their friend. Time passes and she still can’t remember her so the others decided to not bring up Valerie as it would be best to move on. Days pass and the group has the memories of their friend behind them until everyone but Celeste started to see the blue door with the black figure standing next to it waving as if it came to greet them. The three decided to meet after to school to talk about the mystery but couldn’t come up with an answer to why they’re seeing it especially why now instead of before. They each tried to ignore it but they saw the door everywhere they went. Ryan came to a conclusion that it seemed as if they’ll be fine overall if they don’t open it themselves since it seemed like the dark figure nor the door would get closer to them as time goes by. It was all reasonable enough to believe although Ryan started to do some research on the unknown to find the meaning of the door and if it can go away on its own.
     One night the three stayed at the library trying to find clues on how to end it and Ryan decided to use the restroom. When he was just about to open the bathroom door, from the corner of his eye, he saw the dark figure though this time there was something different. As he turned his head, the features of the dark figure became even more real as it waved with its fleshed hand and its face red and mouth with sharp brown teeth that had blood dripping off that caused Ryan to run and warn the others. As each of them ran, all that they saw was the dark figure and the door just waiting for him to approach as they looked up until suddenly someone calls for their

attention. The voice sounded familiar but hard to believe as the person who it could be was presumably dead. Each of them turned towards their right and heard Valerie’s voice coming from the door. As much as they resisted the temptation to open, the idea of possibly seeing her again made Madison think that maybe there’s a chance it’s actually her behind the door until finally she breaks and decided to walk towards it. Ryan and Jordan stood there shocked as she approached the door and as the dark figure stopped waving when she was in front of it. Ryan looked at Jordan then they both walked towards Madison and when they saw a shadow go past the white light behind the door, Madison put her hand around the door handle, twist it, and opened the door to a bright light flashing before their eyes. They walk in but see no sight of Valerie. When Madison turned around she saw two puddles of blood where Ryan and Jordan were standing. Out of nowhere she hears Valerie’s voice again and turns back with a frightened look to the black figure charging at her with a growl.
     Celeste is back at home babysitting her little sister and received a text message from her mom saying that she’ll be home shortly. When she exits out of the conversation she notices that she got a text from Jordan expressing how much he loved her and was sorry for the times he was ever disrespectful towards her and hoped that they’ll be together for many years to go. As sweet as it was, Celeste looked at the text with a bit of disgust as if he was crazy since she had fully forgotten who Jordan was.

" I Refuse to Grow Up" by Sofia H

      It had already been such a long day. I slept through my 4th and could barely
stay awake to see 6th. The whole school day was a blur and I just wanted it to end. It was the end of August, first month of school, and I felt ready to graduate. After the longest tennis practice, I grabbed my heavy bags and started the long journey to the student parking lot. Passing by the walls of my school, I saw bright posters with motivational sayings like Dream Big and Your Attitude Determines Your Direction. I tried to ignore them. It is easy to say something but much harder to do. After speeding home I finally put my bags down, kicked my worn-out shoes off, and fell on the couch. Right then my mom walked in to greet me. I talked to her half asleep and all of a sudden she brought up the topic of college. Oh no. If there is one thing I don’t want to discuss is: college.
     At this point I was wide awake. I never thought I would dread talking about my future but the closer it gets the more I begin to avoid the topic altogether. My mom begins to ask me when the next college workshop is and when I am going to start reading through all the mail colleges have been sending me. I respond with later and I don’t know. Later that same day my dad asked me where I plan on applying. Again. I don’t know. I’m not sure. I haven’t checked! It’s barely August! Everything I have worked for these past few years now riding on a few applications. All the hours spent and all the sweat poured on school are now to be judged.
     My heart beats faster, I tense up, and my mind gets filled with all these wandering thoughts, all the “what ifs” and the doubts...Maybe I am overthinking everything or maybe I am going mad. Either way, senior year snuck up on me and now I hear friends talking about how ready and excited they are to graduate. I am most definitely not. It took me a good month to realize I was a senior and my time was coming.
I know that the moment I start focusing on the future, is the moment I start thinking of everything I will be leaving behind. One more year and I am considered a responsible a dult. One more year and I have to make my own decisions and start building my own life. I have to make the big choices and if I am

lucky I will choose right. So many options that will determine my future paths, and I have to make those choices now as a dumb, naive teenager.
      There were so many days I just wanted to curl back into the toddler I was, where my biggest worries were whether or not my mom would let me watch Caillou t hat day. I finally came to a realization that doing nothing was not helping me in any way. Unfortunately, I realized it is impossible to freeze time. Instead of letting procrastination get the best of me, reality finally slapped me in the face and I decided it was time to get my life together.
     I always thought being my own person would be fun but now it has never seemed scarier. This is not like other years. Next year I will not simply be starting a new grade, but starting a whole new experience. It is terrifying, but I guess it is also exciting. Time seems to go by faster whenever you want it to slow down. All we can do is live in the moment and make the best of it. We may not feel ready to leave high school but soon we will be. These are the days we will look back on years from now and I rather remember them as the fun times rather than the days I melted with stress.
     I have no idea exactly where I am going to be ten years from now but that does not matter at the moment. I cannot control the future, just like I cannot change the past. I can only focus on the now and live to the fullest. Having a positive attitude and appreciating everything I have is my plan for senior year. I will prepare for my future, just as I hope everyone else is, but I will no longer fear it.

"Friday Night Frights " by Alicia G

     As 8:00 pm rolled around, Mandy and Julianne had finished getting ready. The two girls had been best friends and neighbors ever since they could walk. As they made their way downstairs of Mandy’s house, laughter and whispering were heard. They then came to find their mothers in the kitchen drinking martinis and talking about the latest episode of Keeping up with the Kimberleys. “You girls ready to go?” Julianne’s mom asked. “Yes, we are heading out now so bye mom, love you,” Julianne replied. “Love you too, Mom,” Mandy yelled out as she followed Julianne. “Okay be safe girls.” “Don’t take anything suspicious from anyone!” The mothers took turns shouting advice to the girls and in unison snuck in “Love you!” before the girls closed the front door.
     With being in a small town, not many street lights were lit on the street. In fact it was almost pitch black if it wasn’t for the headlights of Julianne’s car and the moon lighting up the night sky. The windows were down and the music was blasting, it already felt like a great night. As Julianne came to a stop at a red light she looked out the window and saw a man across the street looking back at her. He wore black pants and a navy blue shirt. He was of an older age because of his withered white hair and lack there of on top, but Julianne couldn’t quite make out his face. “Jules! The light is green.” Mandy had snapped Julianne out of the eerie headspace and she had forgot about the man within a matter of seconds. Finally they got to the party. No

alcoholic drinks were in sight, however Julianne chose bottled water from the ice chest just to be sure. Mandy on the other hand, poured herself a cup of fruit punch from the punch bowl. Once a great song came on, they were off to the dance floor.
     Lost from being in the mosh pit, the girls hadn’t been able to find each other. Finally, Julianne found her friend in a bathtub covered in red vomit all over her green top and white pants. “Of course the punch was spiked!” thought Julianne. Down the stairs, through the crowd of people, and out the front door the girls trudged with Julianne supporting almost all of Mandy’s weight. As soon as Julianne placed her unconscious friend in the car, she turned the key in the ignition, which gave a slight sputter before starting and with that the girls were off.
     10 minutes into the drive, the car began making the sputtering noises once more followed by slight jerks each time she pushed harder on the gas. Julianne had no choice but to pull over at a nearby park. Cell reception was always sketchy in certain parts of town, so when Julianne had to make the decision of staying with her friend until morning or walking to the nearest gas station for a phone call, she did what she felt was best. Only after locking the doors twice and making sure the windows were cracked an inch so that her dear unconscious friend could breath, did Julianne feel slightly better about leaving her friend. She decided to run to the gas station to reduce time. When Julianne arrived at the gas station she went straight to the phone in the back. As she dialed, she made sure to collect all of her nerves and calm her breathing to be sure not to place her mother into a panic. “Hello?” her mother picked up the phone quickly. “Mom it’s Julianne, we kind of got stranded at McGregor Park, can you please come pick us up. The car died.” “Okay honey, stay where you are I’m on my way,” *click*. Once Julianne’s mother hung up, she began her run back.

     Crossing the grass of McGregor Park, Julianne’s stomach dropped. The passenger door was wide open and Mandy was nowhere in sight. As Julianne got closer she saw that the door had been forced open on the outside. Blood drenched the seat and was splattered across the dashboard. Mandy had been dragged out of the car because a trail of blood was smeared on the floor, leading into the playground where a black mound lay. Julianne sprinted across the lot to the mound. A scream lifted out of her chest that echoed throughout the park. The body that used to be her best friend lay limp, covered in her own blood and stabbed to death. Shaking and frozen in shock remained Julianne. Sounds of footsteps emerging out of the trees shot through the park. A cold chill ran down Julianne’s spine. The thought of her being next shook her out of her imobile state and sent adrenaline pumping in her body. The next thing she knew, her legs were running. A hand, as rough and hard as wood grabbed her shoulder and yanked her giving her whiplash. Still seeing blurry, Julianne tried to focus her eyes on the man standing above her. As her vision began to clear, she realized it was the man she saw on her way to the party earlier that night, except he now had an axe in his right hand that he was placing above his head and grabbing with the other hand. Paralyzed, Julianne looked up at the night sky said a prayer and was plunged into darkness within a matter of seconds.
     A sound of a gunshot rippled through the air and a bullet struck Mandy’s killer through the ribs. Immediately, he fell on the floor. The manager of the gas station, who had heard Julianne’s conversation followed her back to the park to be sure she was safe. But Julianne on the other hand remained on the ground unmoving, for she had died from fear.

"IT’S INSIDE " by Jacob L

Finally home. It had been hours before my group Mikayla,
McComy, Shawn, Jess, Greg,  and I came home from our
graduation ceremony including a party which may have been a
little out the norm for me but a few of the drinks there
helped ease me into having some fun for once. As we arrived
everything seemed normal except for when we got inside. A
window was open and there seemed to be a weird smell kinda
like a wet dog mixed in with something else that so pungent
that would’ve made me gag if I didn’t walk back outside. As
I was trying to breathe while my friends, already used to
smells like this from other parties began to help clean I
saw something at the corner of my eye dash behind a huge
rock from a tree by the shed in seconds. But that wasn’t
possible, that tree was a good thirty meters from there.
Greg pulled me inside before I had time to think about it
anymore with the smell gone and the smell of caramel
popcorn being made by Jess, never have I ever met anyone
who could get hungry so quickly after eating only an hour
ago. Shawn and I being the netflix addicts we are turned
the tv on, only for Mikayla to snatch the remote claiming
it was her turn since she didn’t get to watch it the day
before. After an hour though everyone began to head to the
two rooms that were right by the kitchen to finally get
some shut eye. It started with one voice while we slept. My
eyes opened already adapted to the dark night with the rest
of the guys. No words were spoken as we saw McComy shushing
us as he pointed outside our door. But as I looked there,
there was nothing I could see. Shawn and Greg looked

confused at him as if he was crazy only to hear a loud
crash in the kitchen. Adrenaline rushing in us as the wind
outside began to crash branches against the window.
Cringing and holding our breaths as a maddening, clawing
sound echoed into our room. I felt my hands run cold and my
lungs stop as the door slowly creep open and my breath
finally came back to me when I saw that it was Mikayla and
Jess. I looked for Greg who had jumped into the closet so
fast I didn’t even notice that he had moved from beside me.
No words were spoken as steps so light that it would’ve
been impossible to hear if we weren’t shushed by McComy
again. The gentle thumps began to slowly creep towards the
room beside us and slowly head towards. I pinched myself
hoping to wake up but nothing changed. Thump, thump, thump
was all I heard before I held my breath praying that this
animal whatever it may be wouldn't hear me or the others.
It slowly began to make its way right beside the door,
sniffing, then a growl that was so deep that I could feel
my chest vibrate. I lost control of my breath and was about
to lose it until I heard one of the cars outside begin to
go off. I looked at McComy who had his hand on my mouth and
the keys in the other before I looked back at the door it
was already gone. He finally let go and allowed me to keep
myself from suffocating. We looked around the house as
quietly as possible only to hear a howl in the distance as
if  queuing us to run to the truck. As the engine started
there was a loud crash in the bushes and an image seared
into my eyes of a seven foot tall creature with black fur,
claws that were as long as my entire hand and furious gold

eyes that shined with the lights on its face. All lasting
seconds before Jess slammed on the gas pedal. I laughed
thinking we were safe until I saw where Mikayla was looking
which was beside me. Looking to my left as I was right by
the window I was greeted by the same two golden eyes that I
thought we had escaped and for a moment I thought that I
was about to greet death personally as it leaped towards
and broke my window I felt a pain in my arm before Jess
swerved the beast into a light pole before pressing the
turbo button and taking off again. I passed out from the
pain and let the darkness take over. The next morning I
woke up in a bed and saw a tv in front of me saying that
there was an animal attack at a house  that I then realized
was ours. I saw the Mikayla in the other bed with bandages
around her left eye who then told me it was glass that hit
her in the eye. I got up and went to the bathroom I looked
in the mirror at my arm that had a bandage as I unwrapped
it I could see three claw marks that seemed like they had
already scarred. I don’t know what that thing was,where it
came, or even why it chose to chase us. But I don’t care
all I know is that I am gonna make sure that my friends and
I are gonna be gone by dusk.

"Untitled" by Brooke L

The idea of being a team player has a stigma surrounding it that one constantly needs to
be acting in the best interest of the team, but underneath that lies the selfish values of every player to be recognized. In cultures like that of Ghandi and Mother Teresa, it is popularized to act for the betterment of others at the expense of oneself. Letting go of the ego and being charitable or in service of others is what is most appreciated; however, this can be detrimental to personal well being. Although humans have a nature to reside in packs, their need for glory and recognition can not be ignored. When a child starts playing a sport, they generally want to be the player who is recognized the most: in football they’d be the quarterback, in baseball they’d be the pitcher, etc. From such a young age children pick up on the fact that recognition leads to boosts in self esteem, thus, as far as people can remember, being a team player has had a negative connotation. Group projects in middle-school on have the difficult job of redefining the phrase “team player,” but the basics of what’s been instilled into youth can’t be completely erased. Lebron James said, “I think, team first. It allows me to succeed; it allows my team to succeed.” Even when describing the loyalty he feels about his team, he can’t help but mention that a win for the team is really a win for himself, which is likely due to the fact that he is seen as “the king.” Growing up playing softball, I’ve experienced the different layers to being a team player. On one hand, you need to do what is best for the team, but on the other hand you have to

think about what would benefit you the most. In a situation where college scouts are watching you and you know that if you bunt the ball you’ll move the runners in to scoring position, but you need to show off your hitting skills, what do you do? If you are a team player, the scout to the college of your dreams might not wait to watch you in another at bat. In this situation being a team player is relinquishing an opportunity for your future. In the NFL, doing touchdown celebrations was banned because it promoted individuality in one of the greatest team sports, thus players were forced to suppress their happiness to satisfy others. A situation most everyone can relate to is when you are working with a partner on a group project and end up doing the entire thing. It calls into question whether you should be a team player and suffer the B grade or tell your teacher and get an A, while your partner gets an F. Through all the pessimistic talk, it is still beneficial to be a team player, to a certain extent, because your career may involve working with a group. Perhaps there should be a divide. In the high school and collegiate level, being a team player and the pressure that goes along with it should be reconsidered. However, in professional settings the mentality of being a team player should be employed. There is still and will always be a desire for glory, but considering the age and maturity in professional settings there is less competition within teams and more competition amongst teams. With that being said, I believe that, in a utopian society, being a team player means believing in and working toward the greater good that benefits your team. In the real world, being a team player means relinquishing apart of yourself to benefit the masses.

"15849 Maple Avenue" by Amber R

Today is Thursday, January 11 and it is raining. The sky is dark and gloomy as ever,
most haven’t seen the sunlight in months. Amongst the darkness, yellow specks of light reflect through the puddles in the streets. Families gather in their homes filled with warmth and comfort for protection against the downpour, except one. At the house at the end of the street, 15849 Maple Avenue, the lights are out. No one is home and no one is together. Within the house, the door echoes in every corner of the room with a light pitter patter from the roof. A girl takes her first step into a world she had long regretted to return to. A world that she had once fled from months ago. Back in November, it happened, the fall from grace. The parents that had once belonged to her, were gone. After all the neglect and lonesomeness, she couldn’t take it. She imagined that if she had just disappeared then maybe they would notice. Although keeping close by, she watched her family break from a distance, her mother left last month to look for her and her father is nowhere to be seen. Tonight is the first time she has stepped back through the house that built her. The girl thinks to herself, “The floors are different. Everything has changed.” She thought that maybe if she’d touched this place, she’d feel it, but the truth is, she still feels empty. Alone at 17, Elizabeth walks through the kitchen and the dining room where her family never gathered. She dreamed that one day, she would feel the warmth and comfort like the families down the street had. Elizabeth realizes that she will never have that. “For dreams and fantasies

are for the foolish,” as her father once told her on her fifth birthday. She begins to speak to herself as she has these past months; “Mother knew better than to open her mouth to Father, for she knew what would come if she did.” Within her thoughts, she envisions what that day was like when she had left. Dad walks in through the front door from work, and into her room to make sure she is doing her homework, but she is not there. He starts yelling and goes to her mom who is folding laundry, that she is gone. The floorboards creak as Elizabeth creeps upstairs to her old safe space, where she spent most of her time. Little did she know that her saving grace was just outside her window. Memories linger among the walls and they urge her to leave and to never look back. Elizabeth being the obedient child that she is, goes away from this haunted place. Back downstairs ahead the front door awaits her departure, she walks slowly and out into the street. Out into the rain she goes, within the illuminated homes she sees a child, Thomas Peters, a 7 year old boy with an expression that she had never noticed before. A look similar to the one in the mirror and a family as imperfect as her own. Elizabeth thinks to herself, “Perhaps there is more, than we may know.” With this, she continues down the street and disappears into the twilight.

"Untitled" by Jayleen L

An event that made an impact on my life was on Memorial Weekend of 2016 at Silverlakes sports complex in Corona CA. I played on a team called Team USA that was out of the city of Fontana and on that weekend, we advanced to the championship round in a tournament called Cerritos Memorial Challenge Cup. It was Monday, May 30th 2016. 2:30 pm. 95 degrees. You could see the heat waves coming off the artificial grass on field 4. I remember talking to my teammates while warming up about a player who was injured on the field at that moment because they had to be carried off of the field. I was excited to play this championship game because it was my first ever championship game in the starting line up. *whistle blows* The game prior to ours is now over so, my teammates and I stopped warming up, picked up our backpacks, and walked over to the bench where my team will be sitting. Our coach, whose name is Jose, told us to line our backpacks up and to begin taking shots on goal, which was our every game routine. We walked over to our lines to begin shooting the ball, and I see my family members arriving which were my uncle Ricky and his sons aged 5 and 6. I continued my shots on goal *swish of net* and then finally the referee blew his whistle to signal that it was almost game time and we had a few more minutes to gather and get in starting formation *whistle blows*. My team and I before every game say a prayer and say our team cheer so there we went. We then dispersed into our line up and I headed toward the far corner from where we at to play the position left defender. My team and I were very anxious to begin our game and once the whistle blew, the other team began with the ball and began passing the ball around. My team then won the ball and we began passing it and then it eventually came to me. One minute into the game I had received the ball and since I had space to move forward on the field, I did so. As I moved forward I noticed I had no options and as this happens, two players from the opposing team sandwiched me and I went down..... When I went down, I noticed that I could not feel my left knee and it felt as it was asleep. At that moment the referee stopped the game and ran over to me. He told me to lie down so that he could stretch my leg but the funny thing is that it wasn't my leg hurting, it was my knee that felt uncomfortable like it was out of place. The referee then called my coach onto the field and he asked me what was bothering me and once he heard me say my knee he said I was no longer going to play in the game. I was helped off the field by my coach as well as a teammate and I sat on the bench. I was just thinking about what can possibly be wrong with my knee and I continued watching the game. My team performed amazing throughout the game scoring one goal after another. I wanted to get up from the bench badly to cheer my team on yet I was in so much uncomfortable pain. I got up from the bench to see how my knee was feeling and I put some pressure onto it and it did not turn out well. I took a step and nearly collapsed and my knee was wobbly. My teammates told me to sit down and not get up. I spent two hours thinking about my knee and cheering on my team from the bench. My team after there two hours had won THE championship 5-1. We had fought really hard all weekend to get to this championship and the hard work paid off. We cheered for a very long time on the field and then it was time for the award ceremony. I could not walked so I was pulled on a wagon to the ceremony. I arrived to the ceremony and we were presented with a trophy as well as medals.

We then took group pictures with the trophy as well as individual. I then said goodbye to my teammates and I congratulated every single one of them for their hard work throughout the weekend. On my drive home my parents and I thought of all the endless possibilities of what can possibly be wrong with my knee. We began researching about pains in the knees and what exactly happened to my knee while playing and many sources state that it could have been a sprain or a possible tear in the ligaments of the knee. I went home and began icing my knee because it was slightly swollen. I tried not to think too much about my knee because I was very worried and wasn't sure what the next step would be in curing it. Early the next morning my parents and I decided that I should probably go to the urgent care to get x-rays and to see if they can diagnose me with anything or give me an idea of what could possibly be wrong with my knee. I left urgent care very happy because they ended up telling me that it was only a sprain in the knee and when they moved my ligaments they seem to be intact because if not I would have been in a lot of pain when doing the knee exercises. About two weeks after the urgent care visit I ended up visiting my family orthopedic doctor and right away he recommended taking an MRI and an x-ray to be able to look at all aspects of the knee. The doctor within that visit sent me to go get an x-ray which came out positive meaning there was nothing wrong with the bones in my knee but the MRI on the other hand, could not be taken because an appointment was needed. We schedule an appointment on Tuesday, June 21st 2016 and I found the results out the following day. My heart dropped. I was full of emotions. My mother scheduled an appointment for that Friday to be able to see what the next steps were. I had torn my anterior cruciate ligament (ACL). Surgery. That was the next step. I had the option to get surgery in a couple of months because they were booked or three days later due to cancellation. I took the three days later option. Not by choice. My mother chose. I cried all day every day up until the day of because surgery I knew right away this process was going to be very long and painful. Monday June 28th 2016. The biggest day of my life. Surgery day. I woke up this morning nervous. I got dressed and went directly to church. I prayed to God to make sure he kept me safe throughout the surgery process as well as rehabilitation process. I arrived at the Highland Springs Surgical Center at around 9:00 am. Keep in mind that I was not able to eat 12 hours before surgery so my stomach was growling while waiting. It took a couple of hours to sign in and get dressed into hospital gear. Around noon it was time for me to lay on the bed. The nurse put an IV on my left arm. A few minutes later I was sent into the surgical room. heart pounding. hands sweating. I was nervous. The anesthesiologist puts the mask on my face. I countdown from 10 and last number I remember is five. Next thing I know I am up and ready to head home. Feeling exhausted. I take a nap on the car ride home and my mom helps me get out of the car and into bed. I had to sleep with an uncomfortable brace on my knee for about three weeks. I experienced lots of pain and found it very difficult to travel from place to place while being on crutches and I had to ask my family members for help everywhere I went. My rehab process took nine months. Within these months, I spent them crying, upset and frustrated, I missed the game so much. I used to complain a lot because I hated being handicap but with that being said, I have learned a lot about this

experience. There are people who have experienced situations like mine but even worse to a point when they lose a limb and may not work yet they still try to find a way to live their life.There are adults in this world that struggle from being handicap and can not get a job for example in Mexico. A trip recently has been life changing because after noticing how bad the economy is over there and how little workers get paid, these handicap people can't get a job. I used to complain about not being able to play yet I should be grateful that I have limbs and can get to work unlike the citizens in mexico who can't do anything even for their minimum wage. This process has impacted me and will forever have a place in my heart because it also showed me how strong I can actually be. I am very weak minded and tend to break down easily. Even though I broke down during the process, I now look back and realize that I made it and so can others who are going through something impactful. I now attempt to encourage those who are injured and are depressed and uplift their spirits because something can be done even if you think it is impossible.

"New World, New Beginnings" by Daniel R.

My name is Tony Rogers and I am 29 years old. I live in the state of Calivada, a state which was once two different states (California and Nevada) merged primarily due to loss of major cities such as Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Las Vegas due to natural disasters and loss of land due to rising waters. The year is 2126 and the Earth has a population of 14 billion people. It is definitely not the beautiful blue planet it has looked for millions and billions of years. So much crime, so much pollution, etc., it is very sad for me to be seeing all this in my lifetime. People have stopped working to fix problems and just leave them as is. When walking from work to my little apartment in Fresno which is the biggest city in Calivada, I would see neon streets, flying vehicles and many people. There was hardly any trees. Many people are wearing masks due to illnesses. People would still do entertaining things like watch sports at a bar and get drunk, ride flying bikes, or even take tours of abandoned cities like Las Vegas and learn the history of that city. That was not the only abandoned city of course. I would often just follow my daily schedule which is Wake up, brush my teeth, eat breakfast, go to work, come home, grab fruits and vegetables from the apartment buildings little farm, eat dinner, brush my teeth and go to bed. During my freetime, I like to watch movies such as Avengers: Infinity War and read

books like The Hunger Games which are obviously considered antique since they are over 100 years old. 

  Many people have fled to other worlds in the Solar System including the Moon, Mars, and even some of the moons of Jupiter. Many Earth-like planets have been discovered outside the Solar System. These discoveries began in the late 2020’s. Today, many people have also fled to these new planets in the hopes of creating a new life. One of the most popular planets is a place called Polyphemus which orbits a gas giant like Jupiter or Saturn. I have promised myself never to leave Earth. When I was a kid in school, I have dreamed of making the world a better place which many others called unrealistic especially in the 22nd century. I eventually gave up on that dream and then at age 21, I decided to build robots at a industrial factory for a living. 

One day became a day of shock and fear. On the morning of April 27, 2126, the news reported that one of the colonized planets called Terminus has been attacked by a series of spaceships. Earth and other colonized planets in the Solar System and beyond soon lost communication with Terminus. Weeks pass by with no updates on the situation. One day the same spaceship has eventually made its way to Earth since the aliens stole the coordinates of Earth from Terminus. There is mass hysteria all around the world. The Spaceship eventually makes it way to the Moon’s orbit and freezes at on 5,000 miles away from the surface of the Earth. The militaries of the world try to communicate with the spaceship and there is no response. I called my brother Chris who lives on a floating city in the Atlantic ocean near an abandoned New York City. He says he is ok and is also keeping an update on the situation. Suddenly a big green blast appears from the spaceship and destroys all satellites. Soon afterwards smaller spaceships enter the atmosphere and hover over big cities including Fresno.

The spaceship however does not hover over my neighborhood. For about half an hour nothing happens, which gives us time to evacuate. As soon as I make it to the suburbs of the city, alien robots start jumping from the spaceship and start the invasion. Fortunately, Some radio signals are still working. Me and a group of other evacuees hear that many people are headed Las Vegas. It is considered to be safe since there is no power. I try to contact my brother but the cell phones still don’t work. Me and a group of other people take shelter in Las Vegas in the abandoned hotels and resorts. We managed to carry a food supply large enough for the whole group which was about 20 people. Weeks pass by where I don’t hear from Chris and his family Until one day, I get word from him that he has made his way to New Chicago which as not been attacked yet. The military attacks on the aliens has so far proven unsuccessful. When all hope was lost for stranded humans on Earth including me, a new army of spaceships arrived on Earth to fight the aliens that are attacking us. The conflict takes place in space. The battle is brutal but is quick. When the war between the two alien species is over. People all over the world survived The friendly aliens start assisting humans in the cleanup. They speak in many universal languages including English. The peaceful aliens reveal that they evacuated Terminus before the bad aliens arrived. They have already helped rebuild the colonies there. Other planets like Polyphemus and Mars were not attacked. The aliens reveal that their enemy invaded Earth for organisms. Soon afterwards I hear from my brother and his family that he is ok. I was so relieved to hear that. Within the next few years the friendly aliens have helped make Earth blue, green, and brown again. They have also helped reverse global warming. Antarctica and Greenland are one again covered in ice. Many animals and plants are brought back from

extinction. Many humans now live in spaceships. Earth is beautiful again. Me and my family can now enjoy the New World.

"New" by Leena B

My eyes open every morning at 6 am and within a few seconds, a sudden rush of excitement rushes into my rapidly developing body. My uniform sits on the top shelf of my closet
which is my queue to wake up my mother for her to grab it for me. Dressing myself is a quite difficult task for me at this point of my life however luckily I have my mother who is able to aid me through this complex chore. These long locks will not do for my intense day at the playground today thus needing me to put it up in a ponytail. However, I have also not acquire this skill also resulting in me pleading for help once more. I brush my teeth and eat my breakfast and I am off. My ride is here. These little arms are incapable of opening the massive, heavy car doors which is another favor my dear mother does for me. I carpool with this troublemaker from my private school named Yusef. His mother Amina would drive us everyday down a street to look at the pretty colored birds that would sit on the powerline on the main street to get to school. Khalto Amina would scold her son everyday for creating mischief in the car while I would just sit in the corner of the backseat waiting to get dropped off at the gate. 

The time finally comes to when I get dropped off at the gate. Alhamdulillah. I walk on the faded,white line in front of my class waiting to greet the teacher. In front of me in line is Mohamed and behind is a kid named Ahmed. The teacher comes outside and we greet Sister Mary with a loud, warm, “Assalamualaikum”. We walk in and say a prayer right when we get to class asking for God to protect us throughout the day. We start off with verses from the Quran and then continue with our Arabic lesson. Our young minds were absorbing the new grammar rules and were excited to apply these to the new books the school just recieved. Recess time. It was time to play freeze tag and everyone knew I was the fastest girl in school. We would run around childishly insulting each other in Arabic and run and run until it was time to pray. It is time for the girls to be taken to the restroom in order to prepare for prayer. There is water everywhere considering how many girls were doing wudu’ and how we messed around in the bathroom by throwing water at each other. We walk into the main mosque and hear the call for prayer. The imam initiated prayer and the girls around me start laughing. Prayer is typically taken very seriously and has no tolerance for laughing. However, our immature selves would laugh away while advisors would tell us to hush after every rakat. After prayer, its time to go home and repeat the same thing all over again. 

But this day was different. I moved from my small and comfortable private school. I moved away from the people who grew up with me. I moved away from the people who were just like me. I moved away from a school that I knew everything about. I moved away from everything that I have ever known in my little world. I no longer wake up with the same excitement to go to school. There is now a new burden of having to choose clothes instead of the same uniform every day. I no longer have the luxury of being picked up and dropped by a car. I now have to load the bus with glaring eyes staring me as I walk down the bus aisle looking for a seat. There are no pretty colored birds perched on any of the powerlines.I get to school and wait on the faded,white line and wait for the teacher to arrive. I realize that there no is more

Mohamed and Ahmed but now it is Kyle and Spencer. Our morning prayer has turned into the pledge of allegiance. There is not a letter of Arabic in sight. There are no words of Arabic being spoken. There was freeze tag however it was not the same. It was not the way that I have always played it my whole life. There was not water all over the bathrooms and throwing water at other girls was forbidden. There was no prayer consisting of giggling while being told to stop. This was my new reality. No religion being taught. No culture being emphasized. This was public school.

"Dear Miss Franklin" by Dania F

Dear Miss Franklin, 

I have a song of yours stuck in my head. One of your greatest, actually; or perhaps your most recognizable. No, I’m not talking about “ Respect ”,as in R-E-S-P-E-C-T, as in the song that landed you into the Grammy hall of fame, as in number five on Rolling Stone magazine’s “The 500 Greatest Songs of All Time.” I mean your other one, where you talk about love bringing out the natural side of you. “Natural Woman.” As I continued to sing this classic in my head, I realized I have a few questions for you. But then, I realized I could ask you all I want and you just won’t have an answer for me. So I’m gonna tell you how I answered this question myself. That question being: What is a natural woman? 

A Natural Woman
“...I didn't know just what was wrong with me Till your kiss helped me name it
Now I'm no longer doubtful of what I'm living for And if I make you happy, I don't need to do more
'Cause you make me feel... You make me feel like a natural woman...” 

Aretha Franklin was born in Memphis, Tennessee in March of 1942. She began singing as a young girl at her church in Detroit, however her talent quickly swept her up into stardom. After the success of critically acclaimed charts such as, " Respect ", " Chain of Fools ", " Think ", " (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman ", and " I Never Loved a Man (The Way I Love You) ", she was rightfully known as “The Queen of Soul” by the end of the 1960’s. Among her greatest hits, perhaps the most compelling proves to be “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman.” This is one song that has truly stood the test of time, and for a good reason. The love song involves Franklin singing to her romantic partner, and telling them that she has found value in herself because of their romantic relationship. She accomplishes this by including the statement,”You make me feel like a natural woman.” But what does it mean to be a natural woman? 

The search begins in the depths of our past. The nature of man has been discussed countless times throughout the course of modern history. From Aristotle, to Locke, Hobbes, and Rousseau, the subject of what human nature is continues to be defined and redefined time and time again. To Locke, men exist in the state of nature in perfect freedom to do what they want. Though chaotic, a natural state is neither good nor bad. In the eyes of Rousseau, men in the state of nature are free and equal. Though this is the clearest outline of what it means to be exist in a natural state, there seems to be little to no room for the nature wom an. It can be easily said that

women find a place in these philosophical ideologies simply because they too are included under the umbrella terms of man and mankind. But looking at these philosophies does little to aid us in our search for the definition of natural woman. Can being a natural woman include practicing the “perfect freedom to do what they want”, and perhaps even recognizing that all women are “free and equal”? In many ways, it absolutely can. But to seek the best definition of a “natural woman”, it is most advisable to search within the context as given by Miss Franklin herself. 

Franklin’s song " (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman ", begins with Franklin addressing how her life was dull and uninspiring in the days before she had met her lover. After singing of her feelings of loneliness, she switches to the infamous chorus of,” 'Cause you make me feel
You make me feel , You make me feel like A natural woman.” T o find the definition of “a natural woman”, it is crucial to look at what precedes each chorus. Before entering the first chorus, Franklin sings the line, ”Lord, it made me feel so tired, Before the day I met you, life was so unkind, But you’re the key to my peace of mind...” a fter making it through the first chorus, the same general message continues,” When my soul was in the lost and found, You came along to claim it... Now I'm no longer doubtful, of what I'm living for, And if I make you happy I don't need to do more. These lyrics reveal that in the exact context of the original song, Franklin sings about how she found her happiness only when she had found her lover. At the very surface level the message is sweet and romantic, however, this changes the definition of what it means to be a “natural woman”. Franklin’s song reveals that she is dependent on her partner’s love to experience happiness, and beyond that, devotes her entire existence to making her lover happy. Can it be that the meaning of being a “natural woman” means to depend on others for happiness and validation rather than find that within oneself? Is a natural woman best defined by what satisfaction they are able to provide their partner with? It is very reasonable to assume this given the context of the song, and due to the fact that it was recorded in 1967. But in a modern application, the definition of a natural woman as given by the popular song can be fiercely challenged. 

Today, the topic of womanhood and existing as a “natural woman” is one that is prevalent in the media and society in general. Advances in technology and the normalization of social media usage has prompted a rapid growth in advocacy in women’s rights, heated conversations on the topic of women's’ issues, and has most importantly provided a platform for women everywhere. This has a massive impact on how a natural woman is defined because the definition varies wildly from person to person. Perhaps to one person, a natural woman is someone who chooses not to wear makeup everyday, who opts out of doing their hair, and avoids dressing up at all costs; someone who presents themselves in a way that does not include altering their natural features in any way. To another person, it may be perfectly natural to expect women to reach for the makeup bag, curling iron, and six-inch heels. Since the definition of a natural woman is so varied, it is safe to say that there is no solid definition of what a natural woman is. No one,

singular person or institution can uphold or represent the idea of the natural woman because its definition is so varied. Similarly, it is completely unnatural of a woman to seek the definition of her own natural state in the opinion of others. Even more so, it is never the responsibility of anyone besides herself to define what is natural for her. Truly, the only concrete definition of what it means to be a natural woman is how a woman is naturally inclined to define herself. 

  Rest In Peace
Aretha Franklin
March 25, 1942- August 16, 2018 

Works Cited
Aretha Franklin. “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman.” "Baby, Baby, Baby" , Memphis, Tennessee , Tennessee , 1967.
“Aretha Franklin.” The Official Aretha Franklin Site , www.arethafranklin.net/ .
“Hobbes, Locke and Rousseau Comparison Grid.” THE TRIAL OF WILLIAM PENN , www.1215.org/lawnotes/work-in-progress/hlrcomparison/hlrcomparisongrid.htm.

"A Lost Soul" by Kayla E

When I was younger I wanted to be a veterinarian because I loved animals, then around fourth or fifth grade, I wanted to be a teacher because I loved to help people and I was good at school. Now, I’m seventeen, a senior in high school, and I have no idea what I’m doing with my life. Everyone asks me what I want to do and where I want to go to college, but the only answer I can give them is “I don’t know,” “I’m thinking about it,” or “I’ll figure it out.” I see everyone around me who have an idea of where they want to go to college, or what they want to do, and it makes me feel like I’m behind in life. Most people have family that have gone to college and can help them apply, but neither of my parents went to college, so I’m on my own with applying. And not only am I at a loss in choosing a college I want to go to, I’m lost in choosing a career. I’m a very indecisive person, this is not because I like all my options, it is more the fact that I’m unsure of who I am. When I was younger, I was confident in myself and pretty sure of who I was, but then I grew up and many things in my life changed. You see, I have never lived with either of my parents. When I was a baby, my mom left my dad because he got mad and threw something that could have hurt me, that’s the story I was told. And when I was about 2 years old, my mom brought me, my brother, who at the time was about 6, and my sister, who at the time was about 3 months, to my nana’s house. She told my nana that she will be back in 3 months for us when she got her life together, but she never came back. My mom was in and out of my life, meaning that I saw her maybe once a year and every time I saw her, she had a new boyfriend. My dad, on the other hand, was always in my life. I would visit him every holiday and summer. I grew up with my life like that and I was use to it, until one day everything changed. One day, my mom got back together with my dad and the way my relationship with him changed. My dad use to be active in my life. He would take care of me and spend time with me, and when I wanted to spend a night or two at my aunt’s house, he would allow me to go, but with my mom back in our life, my dad was always sleeping and if I wanted to go to my aunt’s house, he would say ask your mom and sometimes my mom would say ask your dad or she would get kinda upset and say no. So, things in my life changed, and I started to be less confident in my self and unsure of who I was. So, due to my uncertainty of who I am, it’s hard for me to pick a career. I’m lost, but I have done some things to help get me started in life. I have taken honor classes all four years of high school so that my academics look good to colleges. I have also taken the SAT at least once, and I plan to take it again. Also, recently, I have applied to some colleges. I hope that I get accepted and that I can make up my mind on what career I want to pursue soon. From all the

chaos in my life and how lost I am with figuring out my future, I have learned that nothing is perfect and if you try your hardest and do your best, you can achieve many things. But, also, the biggest thing that I have learned is to get a head start on everything, don’t wait till last minute like I have. Start deciding what colleges you want to apply to before your senior year of high school, maybe start around sophomore or junior year. Also, take the SAT sometime in your junior year of high school, so that if you didn’t get a score that you like, you have time to study and take the SAT again and get a higher score that you do like, unlike me where I took the SAT beginning of this year, senior year, didn’t get a score that I like, and when I apply to colleges, they will see that score. Overall, I am lost in who I am and what I’m doing with my life, but I do know that I want to go to a University and get a bachelors, maybe even a masters, degree in whatever career I decide to take, and I hope to get my life together and stop being lost.

"Success" by Ashley S-T

Malcolm X, the most prominent and militant of social reformers during the Civil Rights
movement, faced nightmarish bouts of adversity throughout his life, first in the form of inherent racism, and then for simply wishing to protect and unite the black community against said racism. Despite this, Malcolm expressed optimism and militancy towards his cause and refused to relent in what appeared, at the time, to be a hopeless uphill battle. Regarding said matter, Malcolm X stated, “There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time.” Albeit my day-to-day struggles appearing miniscule in comparison, I recently became aware of the fact that I am faced with the same uphill battle of adversity; the political state of the nation I will come of age in is divisive, toxic, exclusive, and dictated solely by the corrupt nature of capitalism paired with the complacent nature of our citizens. One of the many prominent flaws in U.S. society is gun culture, an issue that our elected officials have failed to address in a momentous and productive manner since it originally surfaced, in 1999 at the Columbine High School Massacre. After nearly two decades worth of similar events, leading up to the most recent mass shooting in Parkland, Florida, my fellow classmates and I felt a call to action and were faced with opposition from nearly every adult that became aware of our plans to participate in the National School Walkout. Although I was faced with the fiercest antagonism of my young

life in the months of planning the walkout, I remained firm in my efforts, campaigned relentlessly, and refused to accept no for an answer, thus allowing me to be successful in igniting a conversation among my peers and elected officials surrounding gun culture in the U.S. 

 

One of the greatest challenges throughout the organization process was opposition from our administrators, who are subconsciously problematic in their very profession, as they perpetuate the prison-like atmosphere on campus that stifles all independent thought from students and thus was quick in its efforts to stifle ours. It wasn’t long until EHS administration had interjected itself into the March 14th Walkout, draining it of student input and replacing it with the melodramatic nature of drama students and alt-right Trump supporters, completely excluding the planning committee from the deliberation process, as well as the final event. The previously addressed Malcolm X faced similar opposition and his Christian counterpart, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., even in death has been sanitized to meet the standards of the administration of this country. With this in mind, I reminded myself of the courage it requires to impact change, according to every great leader to walk the earth, and I utilized the threats to my freedom of thought as motivation to continue to disrupt the natural flow that administration serves to protect. 

Although we faced opposition from outside forces, the most threatening opposition was that from within; our committee found ourselves in a divided state, one that can also be observed in the Civil Rights movement. I felt that I was not being acknowledged for all of my talents and properly utilized to strengthen the movement, as I continuously found myself fighting to gain the floor from another, equally qualified, committee member. It took several conversations with my mentor (Dr. Torie Weiston) for me to understand that my pride was not worth dismantling a

movement, and that before I could lead, I must learn to serve. This realization is not a new one, as I have struggled with it for years- it simply came with a real-life scenario in which I was forced to recognize the real-life consequences I would face if I failed to make a change. With this, I took time to reconsider my motivations and belief system, and emerged with a new sense of understanding of what it means to lead; I stepped down from the pedestal I had placed myself on and began to listen to understand, rather than to react. Additionally, during our discussions, Dr. Weiston helped me to call to mind the opposition from U.S. society that painted a picture of the Civil Rights movement in which Malcolm X and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. were opponents in activism rather than partners; I was reminded that divided movements are crippled movements, and with this my leadership ability and understanding of activism was strengthened. 

 

The most discouraging trial in the weeks leading up to the walkout was being faced with the cynicism, ignorance, and complacency of my peers. It seemed that I was facing a never-ending crowd of hecklers and cynics, whose existences were not inflamed by rage at the current state of union, but rather had come to accept the sickening aspects of our country as commonplace. It was humiliating and infuriating to see people throw our flyers on the floor and post degrading comments on social media regarding our efforts, however this seemed like a nominal price to pay when aspects of other social movements are taken into account- we were not being beaten or arrested, our lives not being threatened. Therefore, I had little difficulty coping with this challenge- it was the perpetuation of misinformation among the youth that I was attempting to educate that was the most demoralizing. Students spoke on topics they had never read about or researched, and gave each statement as fact, leaving no room for correction or additional information. When faced with this challenge, I simply accepted that a growth mindset

cannot be forced, but must be taught and practiced. I remained patient, and though I occasionally became weary and thus unkind to those who had no wish to expand their knowledge, I was provided with this opportunity to practice the ideals I preach as my personal philosophy. Due to this, I acquired information about the mindset of America’s youth and became empathetic to the individual perspectives of my fellow students, allowing me to strengthen my own growth mindset. 

I am faced with adversity on a day-to-day basis, whether the challenge be school related or a matter of my personal life, however none of these matters measure up to the impactful nature of my experience organizing the Etiwanda Walkout. My ability to overcome the adversity of having adults threaten my right to free thought, of struggling with my sense of self, and of learning to respect my peers despite the perspectives they hold, has been monumental in my growth as an individual. Through every step of the way, I learned something new about myself, my peers, and my country; I learned to adapt, problem-solve, think critically, speak with tact, and act with courage for the sake of reaching my goal. Regardless of the seemingly humble nature of this experience, I can state with certainty that when stepping out of my classroom on April 20th, 2018, to see a crowd of students unapologetically preparing to march to City Hall, all united under their passion and led by our committee, I experienced my first taste of true success.

"Untitled" by Skylir F

The urge to throw up increases as I approach the impending doors. The forsaken doors
that lay just before an even more forsaken abyss. The inauspicious black doors, surrounded by a smoky mist, that await me as I start to walk slower. My breath catches, and I seem to forget how to walk. I try to control my breathing and straighten my walk, however it only seems to worsen as suddenly I can’t breathe and I even feel myself start to limp. I try to tell myself to relax , breathe , I am only walking towards my impending doom, what is there to fear? This self-talk allows for a quick distraction, until I again become aware of where I am walking towards. Suddenly, a force knocks me back, and I again have to control my breathing. What was that? I look around to find nothing there. I turn back around and continue attempting to walk. What is wrong with me? I cannot even focus on the thought because I am too busy trying to learn how to walk, although it is pretty difficult as my legs feel like jelly and my feet begin to drag across the pavement. 

A flicker.

My eyes sweep across the view in front of me, and quickly I learn of my mistake, as I bring my head back down. Oh god. The pressure in my chest begins to expand, and soon I feel like I can’t breathe. My chest literally feels as if it is about to break apart due to the incessant, bulging weight of my fast-beating heart. It has to be right under my collarbone now, this t-this thing .

“Just keep your head down, and move,” I mutter to myself.

But it is so hard.

There are so many flickers, all of which seem to have no regard for my passing by. And yet, it feels like they are all looking at me. All of the flickers, shoving past me and streaking across my vision and flashing brightly and clumping together are all moving so fast and I feel as though I am interrupting something; something I am once again not a part of.

As the doors get closer and closer and the flickers continue to judge me I squeeze my eyes shut and wish and pray and cry on the inside that someone is watching me, someone is looking out for me and won’t let this be the end. I wish I could just leave, leave this place forever and stay hidden from anything and everything that is out to hurt me. With this thought in mind I enter the abyss.
There’s a thrumming in my ears, and I cannot tell where it is coming from. In a panic, I begin to feel around where I am, but I can’t see, and worse I can’t move my arms. Where are my arms! My breathing becomes more shallow as I realize that I can’t move anything: my hands, my legs, my head; everything is distorted and loud and there’s a rushing in my ears that I can’t stop either and before I know it hot trails of salt are running down my face. I can’t even wipe them away. The tears keep coming and then I am gasping, gasping aloud and crying and then my nose gets plugged and then I am sniffling and crying and the images are coming back and my chest hurts so bad that I wish I never came here. I wish I never came to this place and the thought makes my chest hurt so bad because I realize...

Slowly, ever so slowly, the rushing in my ears begins to descend, as if a disastrous impending wave had decided against wreaking havoc and instead decides to return to its tranquil state. Yet, I am anything but tranquil; with the absence of the rush in my ears, I am able to make everything out with a despairing quality, and what I find almost makes me wish that I was still paralyzed.
I am deep within the abyss, and awaiting me are all of the things that I thought I had left behind. There is a flickering up ahead, and I subconsciously begin to back away. However, this is a different type of flicker. With a hesitant air I slowly get up, and the most surprising thing happens,
My heart is silent.
No heavy weight in my throat, no incessant fast beating that makes me feel as if I am about to die, nothing-but silence. Oh, how lucky my heart is to leave as it pleases! All is silent, and so I silently begin to walk towards the flickering light.

And yet,
I made it.
If only that was the worst part.
It is a green light, and such images are showcased through an array of pretty light. The images aren’t as pretty, though, and slowly I begin to remember what had happened before I woke to a thrumming in my ears. My heart begins to crawl in my throat once again and my eyes begin to widen as I watch- 

I am on stage right, behind the curtain, listening to the innocent chatter that will soon begin to cease at my arrival

I am getting up from my seat, approaching the man at the front of the room, aware of the numerous pairs of eyes on my back as the heat enters my face
I am looking down at my paper, asking whoever is out there to just give me the right words, the foreign words so that they will stop looking at me
I am reading about a beach-a figurative? literal? who cares?-beach, and I think I understand it, and I want to understand it, but I realize it doesn’t matter

My heart awakens, and, as if nothing happened at all, I begin to walk again towards a set of black doors.