It was a long time ago when I would go to Disneyland often, back when the only life we as kids had to worry about was family and not how we were doing in school, the colleges we had to apply to, what we wanted to do for a career to stick with, our connections, or relationships. The radio would play our favorite songs that still hold a special place in my heart today, not because of how good they were (provided they were amazing) but because it holds memories of sitting together, talking, singing, laughing and joking like one of those TV show families. We had issues like every other family, but it was overshadowed because we actually spent time together, which seems so hard to do nowadays. Almost every Friday, my parents would offer us two options because they would have no work that day - go to a pier or go to Disneyland. My siblings being siblings would always team up against me if they got the chance, but I’d still get to go to DIsneyland every so often.
We hopped in the car and talked about anything and everything that even slightly interested any of us. We would do riddles and acapella a song or two, making the car ride just as enjoyable as the luxury that is Disneyland. I still remember taking the freeway from my house to the theme park which had a giant loop that I deemed the “mickey ear” due to the route connecting to an almost direct path to Disneyland. We never went that direction unless it was to go to the park regardless so I felt it was designed in that fashion for that sole purpose, so why weren't more people saying it? The cars whooshed by as we looked outside playing our silly kid games like punch buggy or I spy, maybe getting a bruise or two from the sheer amount of times my cousin or sister would find a punch buggy before I could even think to look in its direction. The walls of the freeway covered in vines became iconic, and was loomed over by the distant trees that swayed gracefully in the calm spring air. We met up with the rest of our family to eat, as my aunt joined us with her family. We satisfied our appetites and finally arrived at the park, taking the tram as we were immediately immersed in the “Disney magic” as people say, with upbeat music blaring through the crisp speakers, and the alluring colorful entrances. Despite the fact we had simply taken a 30 minute drive to go eat, and another 15 to arrive at the gates, it felt like the day was already complete before even getting to the parks, it was only 9 in the morning and I was already content with our day.
We entered Disneyland with our physical annual passes, back when the world wasn’t entirely run by our devices just yet, and when the prices seemed reasonable. We knocked out multiple rides, the lines which the park is so famously known for were emptier than the malls are nowadays. More rides, more lines, more people, everything was buzzing past - including the time. Before I knew it, lunch had come ‘round and finally the day slowed down as we grabbed our snacks and sat down to enjoy it. Naturally, my siblings and I chose the classic churro, every bite feeling just crisp enough to where it gave a satisfying crunch followed by the strong taste of cinnamon, but soft enough in the center where it wasn't hard on the teeth. It gave me a second to process what happened so far that day in the miniscule time frame. I wanted to see and do everything the park had to offer, including the rides I was petrified of and the silly activities such as seeing my favorite characters and taking the usual family photo in front of the castle. We were back on the move almost immediately. More rides, more lines, more people.
We eventually decided to switch to California Adventure as it closes earlier than Disneyland, and thus we would be able to return after it closes and maximize our time at the theme park. We entered and immediately were thrusted into the chaos, More rides, more lines, more people. I got that feeling again where everything was moving so quickly, not a second was wasted. It'd seem kind of overstimulating, but for some odd reason this feeling was addicting. The feeling was like no other, but best described as hearing your favorite song for the first time, mixed with the feeling of belonging or sanction when you're with those special people/person. I wasn't just enjoying this alone after all, I was enjoying it with those I held closest to me. We took this day to actually get along, a huge difference in our usual, crazy family dynamic. The sun began to set, causing the theme park lights to spring to life like wildfire, lights brighter than the sun, and prettier than the moon illuminated. We took this opportunity to go to Cars land, which happened to be my favorite place in the park because I was obsessed with the movie.
We blazed through the parks to get to this point, and I took this time to finally slow down during the day and just admire what was in front of me. Mesmerized by the extravagant lights around the entire Cars land and around the centerpiece known as the “Leaning tower or tires” which loomed over me. I wasn’t sure of how long I was admiring the spectacle before someone accidentally bumped into me, knocking me off balance and back into the craze. I looked around frantically, searching for my family that seemed to have left without a trace. An unfathomable amount of thoughts formed in my head, but one of them caused a ringing in my ears, my vision to blur and swell with tears, and my body to become shaky. Did they forget about me? The thought crushed everything inside me, and made the world around me dissolve into a hazy plane. I didn't know what to do, but I was in the middle of the bustling crowd, panicking and crying, spiraling through the endless outcomes, all of them being incoherent yet somehow understandable .
Finally, what felt like limbo was interrupted by a worker offering me her hand, her concern for me calming me the slightest bit, enough for me to pause and think about the logical thing to do which was to follow her, she was an adult after all. However this aid wasn’t enough to stop the river of tears from flowing, nor the burning in my eyes or the ache in my heart. She had her hand on my back, leading me out of the crowd off to the side so she could figure out why I was alone. After asking my name, she followed up with the obvious yet heart wrenching question, “Where are your parents?”. The question felt like a knife was twisted into my spine, my answer was slurred and unintelligible so with her limited resources and knowledge of me, she waited putting her hand on my back to try and console me while searching for my parents. Was this place I dreamed about going to be my demise? Am I going to be forced to live here for the rest of my life? How ironic, the place of my dreams turned to horror in an instant. My eyes couldn't bear being on fire any longer yet I had no way to stop it, my hands clenched up into fists, covering my mouth and the tip of my nose and it became hard to breathe. My mom was cautious and prepared for the day this would happen, doing head counts at regular intervals to make sure no one got lost, and yet it felt like this one time she had forgotten, specifically when I was the one who went missing, did my parents not want me anymore? These onslaught of now ridiculous but then very possible questions were unceasing, each new one causing me to drift further into insanity.
After an entire four minutes of being alone lapsed, my mom found me next to the worker and immediately grabbed me, a clear face of relief washing over her as she embraced me. The worker asked if I was her son, to which she immediately responded with a simple “yes”. I was still crying a little bit but I was relieved, my parents did remember me! The day proceeded normally from then on, ending with a couple more rides together, before we said our goodbyes to my aunt's family and headed back to the parking structure. I fell asleep almost immediately after we got in the car, I don't think we made it past the parking structure before all the energy I had expended at the park caught up to me. I never wanted to remember the day again when it initially happened, but now it's my favorite story to tell, because I still enjoy almost all things related to Disneyland for some odd reason, and everything about it is so silly from the questions I was asking myself to the way I got lost in the first place. I’ve asked my family countless times how they remember it, and I was given a large range of answers each unique to the person. From my perspective as a kid it felt like I was lost for such a long time, while my mom and other family members claim it was between two to eight minutes that I was away from the group.
Despite my initial thought being that there was no lesson to be learned here and it was just a silly little retelling of a silly mistake on my behalf, I now see that despite getting lost, I really did enjoy pausing to just look at the lights and appreciate the moment. I now see that I have learned to stop and appreciate the little things in life, because life will never stop moving for you to do it. It’s important to take that risk, even though it's scary at first, because you may lose track of things and get thrown off for what feels like an eternity, but just as quickly as you get lost will you find your way back, and create memories that will last a lifetime and a story that can stir conversation. Life goes by fast, and that day was almost a perfect representation of that, as the entire motto for the day was “more rides, more lines, more people.” because we wanted to do and see so much that it felt like slowing down was out of the question, yet I was able to do it with little repercussion. Furthermore, the childish perspective of the event compared to my parents retelling feels much more eventful, and reflects how our view of life heavily impacts our memories, because as kids we aren't worried about much compared to adults or even now, and I’m grateful for my parents being able to provide me with this life.
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