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Wednesday, February 24, 2021

"The system of failed hope" by Ryan M


It’s about that time again, it comes around more often than you would like, but that’s the way it works… So get up, out of bed, eat some food and clean yourself up. It’s what you have chosen for yourself. It is what you wanted. So do it.

 

                                                                                                      …

 

There, isn’t that better? Now, don’t think about it too hard, just sit down and focus. This is important, the life ahead of you is important. It’s exciting isn’t it? Think about it, every question you answer is one step closer to your dream, to your goals! What a time to be alive, able to chase whatever dreams that you have for yourself.

 

 

Woah! What do you think you're doing? Put down the camera, and look away from that path, that isn’t what you want! Remember, you need to focus to achieve your dreams. You know what you want, but allow me to remind you, you want to be happy. And the way to do that is by sitting down, and remaining focused, how else will you become what you have always wanted to be!

 

“You’re right…. Sorry”

 

 

YES! There you go! Another A, another test completed, trial overcome, and step closer to MY your dream… Aren’t you simply ecstatic? All of my pieces are falling into place, and you will finally be on your path to joy, and success! Wealth, extravagant homes, cars, whatever you please, just keep pushing forward, you’re almost happy!

 

“no…”

 

I’m sorry… No? What do you mean no? You can’t give up on your dream! I know you, and I know you don’t give up, I’ve seen the way you push yourself, you are stronger than you think. Don’t fear, you can make it, you can have your dream if you just follow my words.

 

“My… Dream?”

 

YES! Your dream, and trust me it is a great one, I’ve been doing this a lot longer than you have so trust me, I know how to make your dreams come true.

 

“Your dreams”

 

Exactly, I can make your dreams come true. What we have been working so hard on. The reason you have gone sleepless on important nights and run races deprived of the rest required really run. The reason you have pushed yourself to the breaking point and then some. Don’t let it be for nothing. Don’t let that extravagant mind of yours go to waste! You are smart, you must do something with that.

 

“Oh my gosh… I see it now”

 

YES! Now clean yourself up, you have a test to study for, we have to get you into a good college!

 

“You want me to chase someone else's dreams… That is what this is, that is what this has always been.”

 

No no, it is YOUR dream! And it is real, so put away all of those childish ideas of yours, the ones of starting your own business or traveling the world, experiencing life... Those are nothing more than a fantasy. We need to get you to your dream… Then you’ll be happy!

 

“Not my dream, not my goal, not mine at all. It is what you have planted in me. From the moment I arrived, the moment I stepped foot in this place you have told me you are the only way. The ONLY WAY to happiness… So why then am I so miserable when I look at you? Why then do I struggle to do what you ask of me? Not because of difficulty but because of the undeniability of the time that I have thrown away as I fell further into this trap of chasing a dream someone else has created for me. I’m done.”

 

Done? You can’t be done! Without me you are nothing, without me you will go nowhere, you’ll make no money and live a sad lowly life. I AM THE WAY!

 

“You make yourself out to be a god, toying with my future, attempting to paint yourself as the emphatically necessary and ultimately inevitable path that each must navigate… And money? Is that what this is about to you? Is this dream that you have created for me is nothing more than a scheme into making money with the ploy that it will ease the sting of a life left unlived. You are a dark path shrouded in lies leading lives down a system of hope that is bound to fail them. I know the Way, I know the Truth, and I know the Light. I know where, who, my joy comes from… And it surely isn’t you.”

 

What then? What are you going to do, put down your ONLY chance at success, that is a death sentence. You know you’re safe with me, you know that I WORK. Stick with me and all of your desires will be met. You cannot achieve without me, you cannot make it in this world without me, you NEED me. I am not a choice, I am a requirement.

 

“You are wrong. You are the result of a society built on the assumption that those in it will mindlessly run the rat race that you have created. You are manipulative, selling us all the same blueprint and deceiving us into believing that we were the ones who drew it. And it works, I have found myself running down this maze trying to reach the center of someone else's dream… You have convinced me not to try to find the exit, but to stray deeper, with lies that happiness lies behind the next corner. I have made my choice”

 

Don’t be foolish, there is no choice, not really. It is me, or nothing.

 

“Oh there is a choice. I can choose to follow the meticulous plan that you have laid out for me, and accept an unlived life of comfort and material wealth that carries with it not an ounce of actual satisfaction… Or I can turn to the one who made me… And take a leap of faith, not knowing where I will land, but trusting the one who guides me. I can choose comfort and safety with the guarantee of failed hope... Or I can choose hope, with the guarantee of hard work, trails, failure, and yes, satisfaction. I’m done. Thank you for wasting my time.”

 

P.S.     *For anyone who didn’t catch it, this is a dialogue between myself and the school system/societal expectations. Hopefully you got something out of it.*

20 comments:

  1. Oh wow! I really loved this piece because it really illustrated the internal struggles that students have. I think you did such a good job and showed raw, real emotions.

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  2. I love this and I love how it tells the story of how society wants us to be almost like parents telling us to become successful and the only way to do that is by following what they say and their dreams of what they could not get themselves. -Lauren Perez

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  3. This was really really good. Over quarantine I have thought so much about how I devoted myself to the school system and missed out on living life and having fun. I've been trying really hard this last year of high school to make a change, but covid doesn't allow for much, so hopefully I'll live my life in college. Hopefully it's not too late. Great job Ryan, and thank you for opening my eyes.

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  4. William James Smith IIIMarch 7, 2021 at 10:05 PM

    William James Smith III: I totally agree with you that what a particular person, or society wants isn't always going to be the same as what YOU WANT! Sometimes, I feel pretty limited in school, as often times I am restricted to only using academic, and not creative intelligence. However, as school becomes more advanced, that is now starting to change.

    When I was younger, I thought that life would be more boring as you get older, as you don't have a chance to create anymore, you just follow and only do what you are told. I couldn't have been more wrong! The way I learn my academic material best is MY WAY! I have a weird way of understanding the world, and one day, I can make a contribution to that understanding! We all have it inside of us to use our passion to good purpose, and with endless possibilities out there, the world as a whole is at our disposal to make it better than it was yesterday!

    Many of the things created in life are created because someone saw something that the world didn't have, and they weren't happy about it! We had buildings breaking apart via earthquakes, so we create technology that makes it possible for those buildings to withstand them. We didn't like that people were dying of Polio, so we created a vaccine!

    Just remember that everything that is done is impossible until it is done! Never give up on your dreams! I know you well enough Ryan to know that you can do anything with that great mind of yours!!! :)

    Phenomenal Job!!! :)
    William :)

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  5. Wow! I love this piece so much, it was beyond captivating and eye opening. I love the flow of it and the structure, and amazing job on choosing a topic that is not recognized as much as it should be.

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  6. My gosh I loved this piece. I like how it sounds like a conversation between a parental/guiding figure at first, that seems to be someone that will help you or wants the best for you. So amazing how you made it so clear through this structure the truth about what society/school tricks you into wanting. I think especially with the way it's written it's almost like forced messages you are fed, and I like that the person conversing with the personification of those expectations realized slowly that it was never what was best for them, but best for society.

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  7. wow, literally just wow. I absolutely loved this piece Ryan. You did such an amazing job showing all of these raw emotions!! I loved the message and everything about it! Great job!!

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  8. I love how you brought in allusions to the bible in your argument for making a life for yourself outside of the school system. Bringing all of these things in make it less one-dimensional. More than a one-topic argument. It makes it complex, but that is only because you are complex. This is more of a personal testimony and it brings a lot of aspects of you into it. good job

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  9. This literally made me speachless. I love how it gets into the aspects of society some seem to brush off or downplay. Thank you for putting it into different perspectives, because it is all too true and honestly its sad. I hope by reading this some come to realize it too!!

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  10. Ryan this was phenomenal! I can totally relate to this because I feel like our entire lives we have been painted this perfect image and the only path to reach this perfect image is by torturing ourselves to get these great grades. Thank you so much for illustrating this feeling and this problem that I think a lot of us students suffer with. Awesome piece!

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  11. This was a really unique piece and I really enjoyed the unique conversation format you had. The stress that the school system puts on kids was well written and expressed, and you are definitely a strong writer.

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  12. What a piece for a school blog right? This was really good Ryan! You put into words what we're all thinking but are too afraid to say. The education system is a rat maze and it is unfortunate that it only grows and grows. People with bone-crippling student debt later realize that they can't find a job with their major at all and down the rabbit hole they go. Seeing you take a stand against it makes me so proud of our generation and how aware we've become.

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  13. I couldn't agree more. This perfectly depicts how I think a lot of us have felt for the majority of our lives, which really is such a shame. Very well done, Ryan.

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  14. A great exposition on the struggles of individual desire against societal pressure. You certainly nailed down the repetitive wild goose chase that characterizes so many of our academic pursuits. An education based solely on financial success surely is an infectious ideal. Sadly, these corroding values are omnipresent in the paths we must take to reach our goals. We can only hope that those after us are not subject to the same dehumanizing process.

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  15. Ryan,

    This was truly amazing. You truly showed that the true pursuit to our life goals is not through what grade is written on a piece of paper, but rather how it is our own pursuit of knowledge and hard work. The idea of a school system now, I'd consider it more to be a business rather than a true education system. The detail you wrote within the different perspectives were outstanding. Thank you for sharing!

    -Jesse Ortiz

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  16. Eniifeoluwa OluwadaraMarch 12, 2021 at 1:19 PM

    The unique fashion in which you formatted your essay was truly a sight to see. Many people try and make this point and look uninformed but you expressed yourself intelligentley.

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  17. Incredible, just incredible. You perfectly captured the dilemma of society versus happiness and shown how you don't need money or a high status to be successful, but rather to just do what you enjoy and be happy. I also love the style of writing you chose and how it was laid out, it really made it feel like speaking to some malevolent being.

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  18. First of all, the format in which this was written is absolutely genius. It was super easy to tell that this was a conversation, and it was really enjoyable to read because we as the readers could visualize what was happening as this was being said, and what the subtext was behind the literal dialogue. This piece was stunning Ryan. I definitely feel like we are all held to high standards by people who don't always have our best interests in mind, and this was very relatable on a peer-to-peer level. Thank you for this piece! -Evan Nguyen

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  19. My Goodness, this piece is absolutely amazing. I love the creativity and the method of how you personified the education system. I especially loved how you referenced John 14:6 because, to be honest, that's the real truth right there. I definitely believe that we are all called to do bigger and greater things in our life than to continue on the path that society wants us to take.

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  20. Reading this felt like i was having this conversation in MY head because it was so relatable and easy to read. I loved the effect that emphasizing "you" and "your" had when you were talking about the expectations put on students by society/the school system. It really is so unfair that our dreams get drowned out by what we're expected to grow up and do with our life. Thank you for putting this feeling into words that made it easy to understand!

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