My Friday was
progressing strangely; my favorite math teacher was aloof, the normally
friendly cafeteria ladies were expressionless, and I was last to get lunch,
which happened to be leftover “mystery meat.”
As I walked toward my best friend, to eat lunch with, an eerie feeling
crept up my spine. I grimaced as a scent
of death seeped into my nostrils. I looked around the school courtyard only to
find everyone, including my best friend, gazing at me with crazed
expressions. My eyes grew large, and
“AHHHH!” I screamed as I threw my food
in the air and ran.
I dashed into the
nearest classroom, barricaded the door, and hid under a desk. I knew I needed a plan, and looked out the
window to get the whereabouts on the Zombies.
As I peered out the window I saw my best friend, in human form, covered
in my lunch and hiding in a trashcan. I realized
that my lunch, the “mystery meat”, was as an antidote for the Zombies.
Now, I had a plan. I
gathered a hose, a mannequin, a rope, a meter stick, and all the “mystery meat”
I could find. I lured most of the
Zombies into the courtyard with the mannequin and any astray were met with my
meter stick and rope. Then the disgusting
meat was hosed on every undead creature.
As my plot succeeded, I saw teachers and students rise from the heaps of
meat. I smirked in disbelief and made a
mental note to stash some of the cafeteria “mystery meat” for any future Zombie
infestations.
Great story it for sure gave me the goosebumps.
ReplyDeleteGreat story and perfect for the upcoming holiday. The story was pretty funny, especially the fact that the mystery meat was the antidote to cure everyone of the Zombie virus. I liked the description used, I really could picture our school and how you would run from the cafeteria to a classroom. What also made the piece funny was the fact that you used "random" resources (hose, meter stick, a mannequin, and of course the mystery meat) in order to build this zombie curing machine. And in the end with you "made a mental note to stash some of the cafeteria “mystery meat” for any future Zombie infestations" just added to the humor of the piece.
ReplyDeleteHow funny! I really did enjoy reading this story. It was entertaining and funny. The irony of it all made me laugh. Stereotypically, school food is seen to be disgusting, and I loved how you used that concept that create the zombie anecdote. Good Job.
ReplyDeleteLauren, this was so cute!!! I am typically not a fan of the whole zombie fad, but this was an exception. I really enjoyed how you put a twist on the age-old stereotype associated with "mystery meat" - whereas I expected the meat to be the cause of the infestation, it turned out to be the cure! I think your solution to zombies is infinitely better than the bloody alternatives shown on TV. Maybe the screenwriters should start consulting you on how to create brief, humorous, and intriguing plotlines!
ReplyDelete-Christina Tapia
Funny story, you would assume the mystery meat is what infected the school but it is actually the antidote.
ReplyDelete-Sabrina Rondero
Hahahahahah I thought your piece was very humerous and I enjoyed reading it :p
ReplyDeleteI feel as though I should stalk up on some "mystery meat". That was definately a twist I didn't see coming.
Haha, this is great! Who would have thought that the "mystery meat" would be the antidote for the zombies? This may seem bizarre, but I automatically related you to a scientist, as there are many scientists from the past who have made mistakes, but benefited from them (for example, the creation of Penicillin, pacemaker, saccharin, superglue, etc.). You are just a scientists who have accidentally spilled "mystery meat" on your friend and actually found a cure for zombies! Anyways, it was a fun and enjoyable read.
ReplyDelete-Ben Chang
Laurin! this story was very funny with the nasty school food. It was fun reading something that made laugh. Good use of imagery was like a picture in my head. Good job!
ReplyDeletePuahaha I enjoyed reading your story because it was fun and reminded me of a children's book. The fact that mystery meat was the antidote for zombies really makes me wonder what makes up mystery meat. Very enjoyable!
ReplyDeleteI like how you add a halloween theme to your story. I also like the great vocabulary that you use. I also like how smart you are in the story and thought fast and made a plan to kill the zombies. Great story.
ReplyDeleteThis story was great! Your use of relevant surroundings made it so much easier to connect to the story. In fact, this is the second day I go to lunch with this weird paranoia and a strange craving for any food available with meat. Also, the flow was so nice that the imagery you used transferred over as a projection to my mind with no loss of any detail. Thanks for the added thrill at school.
ReplyDelete-Yamen Mubarka
Laurin! I loved how your story was suspenseful, but also had comical relief which really made your story interesting! I loved your use of diction and imagery which really helped me picture a strange and scary scene during the school day. I don't know if it was intended, but I got a sense of irony with the phrase "mystery meat", because by the end of the story the mystery of the meat wasn't unknown anymore. I thought your story was great!
ReplyDeleteThe "antidote" was completely surprising, and unexpected on my part. Who knew school food actually had a use rather than filling our bodies up with trash?! Plus the story was about zombies, so it instantly caught my eye. I really enjoyed you're work, this was very amusing!
ReplyDeleteThis story made me laugh! I found it funny that the stereotypical gross lunch saved the day from the zombies. The only thing I'm confused about is how all the school became zombies? Overall it was entertaining and it put a smile on my face. Great work!
ReplyDelete- Hannah Mueller (12) per.5
I love how you made the mystery meat the antidote for the zombies. I also liked your use of imagery because it allowed me to visualize the story in my head. Great job :)
ReplyDeletePersonally, If I were amist a zombie attack, I probably wouldn't have the bravery to act the way you did. Knowing me, I may have just stayed in that classroom untill the end of time. Luckily this story had such courageous protagonist! Nice job on the imagery, and keeping the suspense so tight!
ReplyDeleteThis story was very funny I found it ironic how the "mystery meat", which you would think to be the cause of the zombies, was actually the antidote. Great twist really enjoyed the story.
ReplyDelete- Percy Starks
This piece was very funny. The imagery and descriptions made it all the more entertaining. The "mystery meat" made me think of our lovely school lunches and how hilarious it is that they are so bad they can ward off zombies. well done.
ReplyDeleteYour story was a comical ironic twist to cafeteria food. Through your descriptions I visualized this awful cafeteria food that is in most cases pretty bad. It was a bit of a relief to know that the zombies didn't eat any of the characters which kept making me laugh throughout the story. Your story also fit perfectly with the time of Halloween. I enjoyed how you incorporated scary elements that were enjoyable to read. Great job :)
ReplyDeleteoh yes! the zombie apocalypse is inevitable! i am glad to see that you are prepared. i have i safe room in my house for the occassion. But seriously it was a great little story and very fun to read :) funny though because i never knew that school lunches were actually good for something :P
ReplyDelete- Justin Myers
I like how you made the nasty "mystery meat" the way of saving you from the zombies;at least it works for that.We should all save as much mystery meat possible for future zombie attacks.
ReplyDelete-Chelsea Gonzales
What a clever story! I love the nontraditional antidote with the mystery meat. Just what is it made out of I wonder? I enjoyed how you spared no one of the curse - even the best friend contracted the disease. All in all, great job!
ReplyDeleteOh dear! Laurin this is a great funny piece! I really liked how as a reader I could really go along the roller coaster of emotions as events start unravel by using first person as the perspective. Now if only school lunch "mystery meat" could actually be as tasteful in real life as it is useful in this story.
ReplyDeleteOh no! ZOMBIES.
ReplyDeleteGreat plan on stashing some mystery meat just in case for the future. Haha!
This was a very enjoyable piece, and even got me to smell the "scent of death" since something fishy was definitely up.
Utilizing the listing technique made me want to jot down some notes on what I may need for a zombie infestation.
It would definitely be handy to have a mannequin lying around when in a desperate situation as that.
But the gazing with crazed expressions would have gotten me to probably faint before I could get to any of the equipment needed to survive this zombie infestation... And I would surely turn into one of them.
Definitely a quick and easy read with a hint of humor and a nice touch of imagery to allow the reader to see what is described in the piece!
I'm a sucker for all types of zombies stories, and I especially love this one that you wrote! It had a twist to it, unlike most other zombie stories. The mystery meat definitely threw me off, but I enjoyed how I didn't see the end coming. You kept my attention throughout the whole story as i found myself reading quickly just to find out what would happen next.Good job Laurin! :)
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA ! This is really funny! I liked how you went to the opposite direction of the norm, in making the "mystery meat" a cure when it is often referred to as gross and unwanted like in the beginning of the story. And since Zombies are "in " right now, this was a really good topic to write about, yet the twist you put in was really fun to read about ! Good Job!
ReplyDeleteI really liked this piece! It was almost like a Twilight meets Etiwanda High School scenario. You have a vivid and wide imagination and you emphasized it by your wide use of imagery as the monsters were in attack mode. Overall nice work! (:
ReplyDelete-Alyssa Sanchez
Love the irony in this piece, it elevates your cute and quirky story to a level beyond the typical zombie show or movie. It's also funny that the main character was hardcore enough to take on a whole school of zombies and win. Normally, that wouldn't be believable, but your sassy way of writing made it possible to imagine. Great job with this!
ReplyDelete