"Target, Ice cream, and Bubbling Apple Cider" by Michelle W

 

Initially, when my friends and I decided to go for a little Target run, we were just planning on getting some ice cream and getting out of there. It was going to be a quick in and out type of sitch.

 

However, my friends decided to get a little preoccupied with my wardrobe choice and play dressup before we left. I remember hurriedly trying to finish a homework assignment as I saw them rummaging through my closet, clothes flying left and right, piling up on the floor. Before we knew it, we were all putting together the most ugly outfits possible in the history of human history. If someone wasn’t looking utterly drop dead ugly, we had to up the ante and concoct some other awful outfit. Then some genius decided it would be funny if we didn’t change out of the outfits and went straight to Target looking like fools.

 

The night air was crisp and we all piled into one car, gassing ourselves up about how funny the whole ordeal would be when we got there and walked around. But, as soon as we got into the shopping center’s parking lot, embarrassment hit like a train in the face. In fact, we were so humiliated we opted for something instead of Target- a sidequest, one might say: The Dollar Store.

 

So we head into the dollar store and heads are turning. I mean, why wouldn’t they be? One of us was wearing a tuxedo with flowy pants that looked like a skirt (and some beautiful crocs), and another was wearing a skirt over pants with dress shoes. After walking down the aisles like we were runway models and purchasing some sunglasses we were out of there with a new self of self-establishment and confidence. It was time to hit Target.

Imagine the stares received at the dollar store, times ten all fit with the adrenaline rush of knowing that you are an absolute anomaly to others around you in public. Knowing that people are staring at you​ in confusion. The ice cream was obtained and we bought two bottles of sparkling cider to commemorate the events.

 

Have you ever asked the question, “What is the purpose of life?” Well, after that day’s ordeals I can confidently say there is none. I don’t mean that in a negative way. People can interpret this question in plenty of different ways, and plenty have, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter. In the grand scheme of things, we are just one of the billions of human beings that inevitably at one point, will cease to exist.

Whenever I start worrying about something a little too much, I take a step back and reevaluate. Is this going to matter years down the line? Absolutely not. So why am I getting so worked up about it? Am I ever going to see those people from Target ever again? Nope. And just like that, I relax. And this concept applies to so many specifics in life. Outwards appearance and how you are perceived by others, for example.

I think it's honestly a tragedy how many people will limit themselves to comfort instead of opening themselves up to new situations or scenarios for fear of making a fool of themselves or not being perfect at something. Just like Hillary Duff said from A Cinderella Story, “Don’t let the fear of striking you out keep you from

playing the game.” Because, in years time, who’s going to remember that you humiliated yourself doing something stupid? Everyone is so preoccupied with themselves that they probably won’t even care for a second glance in your direction. Stop caring so much about what others think and just go for it.

I’m still scared of the social constructs created around me, don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to look like some sociopath and lack so much self-awareness that I’m no longer understandable by other people. I’m just saying that the art of not caring anymore is truly beautiful. For so long I’ve been looking at life from a bird's eye view, where I’m walking on a small pathway covered in glass shards and I have to be extremely careful from stepping on anything when I could have been seeing things from a different perspective all along.

 

So the next time I want to do something but I’m afraid of someone’s opinion or how I’m going to look, I’ll just remember Target, ice cream, and bubbling apple cider.