"Life is Okay" by Isaac I.

To Ethan,

 

It’s been over half a year since you were taken from us. Everyday, you have always been on my mind and you have been my inspiration to push through all of my tough obstacles. I remember the night of May 7th, when I heard the news that would change my whole perspective on life. It was about 11 o’clock, and I was in bed on my computer while talking to a friend on the phone until I heard a knock on my door. It was my brother, and he asked me, “Have you spoken or heard from Ethan at all today”, and I said no and as I said that, he had this really curious and confused look upon his face and he said, “Ok, well let me get more information and I will update you”, and I just said ok in a confused way. After this happened, a lot of things started to pop up into my head, and I felt my heart start to rapidly beat and I kept mumbling over and over again, “Please don’t be gone E.” As I came out of my room, I saw my brother talking to my other brother and as they both looked at me, my brother said, “They found Ethan in his room.”

 

As I heard the news, I immediately fell back to the wall and started to cry and I ran to my room and slammed my door because of how upset I was. I didn’t know what to do, like do I call the guys because some of the guys knew about what happened to you way earlier than I did. I eventually called three guys that I knew when the news first dropped out, they would’ve been told earlier than everybody else. One of them answered and he seemed like he just wanted to be by himself so I let him be on his own, and when I tried to call another guy, he wasn’t avaliable to talk because he was there at your house to be with your family. Unfortunately, the last guy I called did not know about you and I was the one to break the news to him, which I did not want to do. The next day, I went to our church is and I went inside and I started to cry because I knew that I wasn’t gonna see you there anymore and I kept looking around and seeing spots where you, me and the boys would hang out.

 

I could have never imagined in a thousand years that I would get news like this about you, and I never thought it would be so early. Life before this wasn’t that good because we were just put on lockdown due to COVID, and then for this to happen along with being locked in my house and not being able to go out and hang out with you was unreal and horrible. Even though you’re 3 years older than me and grew up in a different household, it still felt like me and you were brothers and on the day of your funeral I found out through my sister that you and me had the same godmother, which would make us godbrothers. I remember like it was yesterday when we played in a pee-wee basketball league for our church and after our games, you, me and a couple of our friends would go to the concession stand and always ask to see if they had snow cones and then after, we would mix our flavors. After those small and interactive moments as kids, we all grew

into young men and started to hang out more and have serious conversations about each other and check on how we were doing and what was going on in our daily lives. The connection and brotherhood between you and me and the rest of our guy friends at church is something that can never be broken and I will cherish it for the rest of my life.

 

Ethan, I know that you were sad that you were leaving your friends and family behind, but I know that you’re happy in Heaven with your grandpa and you both are watching over your family. This is not a goodbye because I know that the next time I will see you is when we meet again in Heaven. I do have to accept the fact that you’re gone and I won’t be able to see you physically. It hurts to think about that, but then again I know that you’re in Heaven with your grandpa and playing basketball with Kobe and telling him many times that you could beat him in a one on one. What I can take from your passing is to don’t take like for granted and don’t wait for the right time to come because we don’t know when our time is up and we are called home to Heaven. I know you had projects on your own and you weren’t able to finish them, but I know that people are gonna continue your legacy and help you finish your projects. I always think of what you always said to your friends and family, “Life is Okay.” That is a saying that I will always look to for inspiration whenever I’m in need of help or when I am ever feeling down. Forever until my time comes, I will tell everyone your story and how you became an inspiration to not only me, but for everyone and hopefully, your story will carry on to each generation. I love you Ethan, I miss you Ethan, and I know one day, me and the boys will reunite with you and we’ll just talk and play basketball and listen to some music and have the best time of our lives.