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Monday, May 4, 2020
"Abnormality- The War of 500 Years " by Annabelle E
There once was a far off kingdom in a far off land. This kingdom lived in peace and
harmony, every element was balanced and the cycle of the universe was set. The queen of this
kingdom, Endelle Blackpearl, ruled with her twin brother, Malikai. They lead the End with grace
and strategy, for years they worked together, and for years they were calm.
However, when a new dimension was born, dubbed Reality, the job of controlling this
was bestowed upon Endelle, and Malikai grew jealous. He had always felt cast aside, forgotten
and neglected. Compared to his sister he was weak. She, with her powerful Soul-Space magic,
her beautiful body and lovely personality, was vastly more admired than he; Malikai was a short
tempered, aggressive, and introverted man who never fully understood or controlled his
Soul-Void magic.
And so, the day before the coronation, Malikai snapped. He searched for his sister, who
was often out in the town mingling with their subjects, and dragged her into the streets. She
fought against him, but was eventually overpowered by his chaotic magic. After a long, drawn
out battle, Malikai won and Endelle was killed. With no remorse he laughed and threw her body
into the lake of the nearby forest. However, he knew as well as she did that she wouldn’t be gone
for long, for these particular siblings will never truly die. Their souls were too powerful, and
their roles in the universal order were too important.
Malikai built up an army of ghostlike creatures, appropriately named Voidwalkers. These
creatures were at his beck and call, night and day, and did know know any different as their souls
were enslaved to eternal damnation. As Malikai built his army, Endelle dragged herself out of
the lake, and called upon her father, Diaboli Ex Animus, to aid her in taking back the throne.
Diaboli did not need much convincing, as he had always known these events would occur, and
that his son was an ignorant man. As a gift, he created four knights for his daughter. Each knight
a different ability, and each knight a different section of the universe to represent and control.
The first knight created was Famine. He had the ability to starve millions, not only of
sustenance, but emotional stability, rendering them defenseless and incompetent. The second
Knight was War, as the name implies he was aggressive. Capable of taking down entire armies
with the single swing of his sword. The third knight was Plague, a meek and sickly fellow.
Although, his demeanor did not do his mind justice. His abilities allowed him to cast entire
populations into psychological despair, and physical sickness as well. Lastly, the most powerful
knight of all was formed, and his name was Death. He could do anything his heart desired. And
from the moment of his creation, his heart’s desire was to protect his Queen. These knights acted
as Endelle’s personal bodyguards, her Reapers, collecting souls for her to sort through and assign
final resting places to.
The knights bowed their heads and pledged their eternal servitude to Endelle, who
accepted graciously. She told them all about Malikai’s tyranny and how she was to overthrow
him. They agreed to help and together, they waged a war against the Void Army, for 500 long
years. Gathering support from magic beings of all races and abilities. And eventually, the power
was returned.
As Malikai fell to his knees in front of his twin sister, he begged her for death. He
pleaded and pleaded, but she declined the action of killing him. For her love for her brother
exceeded any ill will she may have had towards him. Instead he was banished to a desolate
dimension, the Void. The space between all physical dimensions, the nothingness between
worlds. Malikai, in despair, learned to live in said space, and built his own kingdom, with his
precious void walkers.
And thus, the universe was restored. For at least that small bit of time.
Author’s Note: Hello! This piece of writing is something I am planning to turn into a video
game, so any ideas or criticism is welcome! For anyone wondering, yes The End is based on the
dimension in minecraft, i was 10 when i created these characters and have developed and used
them to this day!However I obviously do not own Minecraft. I hope you enjoyed!
Wow! This is amazing!! I love your creativity and imagination! I would never be able to think of something like this. Also, oddly coincidentally and unrelated, but I just binge-watched the first season of Riverdale, and this story for some reason really sounds a lot like what happened I don't know why lol. But, anyways, I loved how you set up context in the very beginning of the story, really helps the readers gauge what is to happen. I also really liked how you capitalized certain words such as "Plague" and "Famine" that we normally wouldn't do. It sets up this kind of ominous tone as it alludes to certain events that have happened in the Bible. Good job!
ReplyDeleteInteresting short story. Good idea and this sounds like a good general loose outline for a game though the writing employs many fantasy tropes. There is nothing wrong with the usage of these, they are all tools after all. However it is important to understand the type of tone and appeal you want to convey within your story, overall though solid beginning idea.
ReplyDeleteI really like this short story! I love how you set up the plot and built up the characters until the very end. I honestly believe that this could also be turned into a tv show of some kind.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, thanks for an amazing read!
Bravo! This could definitely be turned into a game! Especially with knowing that "these particular siblings will never truly die. Their souls were too powerful, and
ReplyDeletetheir roles in the universal order were too important." That means that once Malikai is defeated, he could be reborn for a sequel, etc. Also I don't know if this was intentional, but I also liked how the beginning of Malikai, "Mal", means bad and he was the evil character.