" I Missed You" by Samar E

      All I have to my name is a box of tissues, a headdress passed down from mother to daughter starting all the way since before my grandmother was born, torn and filthy gloves, and slippers made of wood. It’s Christmas time this year, the snow is fighting me, the wind is rushing through every pore in my body and the temperature is lower than the number of toes on one foot. Every day I ask the same question, “Would you like to buy a tissue?” “Do you have any change, any at all?” Every person I encounter I ask the same question.

      I’ve fallen asleep. It’s probably the middle of the night and the only thing outside in this inhumane weather, is me, my tissues, and a dead cat. I wonder if that will ever happen to me yet. I wonder how happy and warm this cat is, knowing it doesn’t have to survive like this anymore. Who will I meet? Will I see her again? Will I be able to touch her and have her cradle me, say my name to soothe my bad dreams, to hear her say, “I will love you forever and always my love.”

     It’s getting colder now, and the only thing I can hear is my ears pounding, my chest beating, and my breath getting colder each time I exhale. How did this happen? Baba was suppose to take care of me; he wasn’t suppose to leave; he was suppose to keep his promise, but I guess he wanted something better than what he got. But it was worth it, I was her only priority, her treasure that she said she would never leave behind no matter what would happen; but then she did. God wanted another friend to have up there, so he made her ill. She would lie in bed, and each day, minute, second, she got closer to seeing Him, and each second she got closer to leaving me. How could she do this? How could she let her treasure fend for herself, not even old enough to pay taxes, have children, drive or get married?! I thought she wouldn’t leave me no matter what. But I guess things don’t always go the way you want it to.

      It’s snowing harder now, and it is getting colder, and harder to breathe. All I hear is time ticking; ticking for whatever reason, maybe my death, maybe my happiness, my life, anything. However, I would give any chance just to touch her again, and to have her tell me to be strong, fight through these challenges and know that there is something better for you down the road. But I can’t wait that long! She makes me so angry, so emotional, so happy, I just want my Mommy back. I want her to kiss my forehead and tell me that life isn’t worth living if she doesn’t have me.

      Now I’m getting sleepy, and I am so numb that I haven’t realized my nose is bleeding, and my eyes are wet. I use whatever strength left and wipe them away, but when I reach for them, it’s already in some else’s hands. The figure is so bright, but so beautiful. She touches my face and it instantly warms. She wipes my mess and kisses my cheek, and gives me her hand. Knowing I can’t resist her I grab it, and I instantly feel lighter, happier, and warm. But before I go with her, I want to bring my box of tissues, but it’s stuck in the hands of a girl, whose face is pale, her eyes are closed, and her body is cold. Carefully I take the box of tissues from this familiar figure, and catch up to meet this angel. As we near the path she says, “I will love you always and forever, my love.”