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Monday, February 2, 2015

"Introducing The New You " by Milani T

“So, how exactly do I come out to my parents?” 
“What will their reaction be? Will they hate me?” 
“Do I hate me?”
“This is who I am, love me or leave me.  I’m Hannah Greylynn. I am a 24 year old successful  creative director in a well established advertising company. I’m fun, outgoing, financially independent and I hate pickles on my burgers. I am proud supporter of the LGBT community and a recently self- declared lesbian. I love and accept who I am and damn, there should be a step by step instruction book on coming out to your family!”
Peter- “There is. It’s called “My Journey Out of the Closet.”
Hannah- “Where were you with this book three years ago!”
Peter- “Trying to grasp the fact my girlfriend of five years is a lesbian.”
Hannah- “Jeez Pete this is not about you today, any other day to be selfish would be fine, but not today.”
Peter- (Calmly) “I know Hannah this is your moment. All about you, but why did you choose your parent’s annual New Years Eve party to come out to them.
Hannah- “ It’s the New Year! That means a new me. The real me, plus they can’t make a scene with our neighbors here.
Peter- “Okay not that they would, but what about your grandma, didn’t she just leave the hospital last week due to some form of a heart condition? Will she be okay?”
Hannah- “Oh she’ll be fine, I’m not worried about coming out to her. She is a strong supporter of the LGBT community, so much so her and her bingo friends compete over whose closer to their gay hairstylist. She finds the gay community exciting and finds Neil Patrick Harris an elixir for a long life. Not entirely sure what she means by that, but sounds positive.”
Peter- “Oh Grandma Greylynn you are something else. Oh, what about Ben, does he know already. I figured since you guys are twins you have some type of twin telepathy feel going on...”
Hannah- (Irritated) “Ben knows nothing, but I guarantee you that *ick will make this about him in some way, always craving attention, always trying to one up me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he said he eloped with some woman he met online the moment I come out. You know he purposely scheduled his driving test the day of my 11th grade dance recital.”
Before Pete could answer Hannah’s mom calls them both down for the New Years countdown.
Mrs. Greylynn- “Hannah, Pete time for the countdown, get your heinies down here!”
Hannah-(Hyperventilating) Sweet Mother Teresa! I can’t do this I need to see more coming out videos! I’m not ready Pete I’ll do it next year.” 
Peter- “No Hannah stop, you’ll do this now. You owe it you yourself to be yourself. They’ll love and accept you the same way I did and the same way you did, and if for some inexplicable reason they don’t, just remember it is your life and you don’t need their approval. If they really love you they’ll accept you for you and move on.”
Hannah- (tearing up in the eyes) “Thanks Pete, *sniffs* you’re a great friend, now if only you were a woman (jokingly).”
Pete-*sighs* “Ha..right.” 
Hannah and Peter head down the stairs. Hannah *heart rate increases* looks around to sees her family gathered around the t.v counting down the seconds. She times the exact moment she will tell them. 
GreyLynn Family- 5...4...3...2..
Hannah- “Mom, dad, grandma I’m....”
Ben- “I’M GAY MOM AND DAD!”
Hannah- “Son of B....!”
Grandma Greylynn- “I knew it! haha wait till the girls at bingo here about this. Got my own Neil Patrick Harris Elixir right here HA ladies!” *throws hands up as though just winning the lotto*
Mr. Greylynn- *opens wallet takes out a 20 dollar bill and hands it to Mrs. Greylynn* “Son we...well your mother and grandma knew, but we love you regardless...”
Mrs. Greylynn- “We are so proud that you came out to us, we know that this must have been really hard for you.”(Canadian accent)
Ben- “Well it helped having “ My Journey Out of The Closet” as a step by step self help book for coming out.” *glances over at Hannah and smiles smugly*
Mrs. Greylynn- “What a great way to start off the New Year! Thank you for sharing this news with us. We’re so happy you can finally be yourself *hugs Ben tightly* Now who wants cake.”
Everyone- WE DO!” *all at once head into the kitchen*
Hannah stands in disappointment yet relief knowing that she will be accepted whenever she decides to introduce the new her.
Mr. Greylynn- “Hannah so sorry you were about to tell us something. What was it?”
Hannah-*smiling* “Just that I love you guys.”
Mrs. Greylynn- “We love you too Hannah Banana.”
End.


28 comments:

  1. Madison P. period 4
    I loved the comedic elements you incorporated in your piece at the end such as shock, humor, making the serious silly. I was reading in suspense at how her family would react and how she would tell them all and the started laughing at the way her brother did the same. The structure of your piece was great and it allowed the story to contain more emotions, feelings and reactions from the characters.

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  2. This was an amazing story. It was really funny and lighthearted, especially the ending and it is very relatable to a problem that many people struggle with. Great job!

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  3. Great story! I like how it was in sort of a play format including specific details to make it more interesting.

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  4. I found this story to be very amusing, but yet very serious at the same time. Overall it is a very humorous tone to something that people usually find as a very serious subject.

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  5. Elisabeth Domond, Pd.5

    Good Job Milani! That was a good story. Right from the start I knew what the story was about when I read the title. The dialog between the characters is amazing and very detailed.

    Great Job!

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  6. Loved this story. I especially loved your writing style !
    imalla ramirez
    period 6

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  7. Dean Garcia period 6
    This entire story was well written and the dialog between the characters was flawless. It is often that the situation could be so frighting, the very though of telling your own family something that has been kept a secret for so long could be so bone rattling that it keeps the person from the truth. Overall good job on the story.

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  8. Good jobb i love your writing!!!! I felt like i was in the story
    period 6
    izabel linn

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  9. Great format of writing, love the way you set the dialog between the characters is perfect great job.
    Anthony Absher
    Period 6

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  10. Marian Hollinquest
    Period 4
    OMG your story took such a funny twist! It started with a light-hearted, but serious situation and then took a turn to the realistically absurd!
    Keep up the good work!

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  11. LOVED the ending! I was so worried as to how Hannah's family would react, but the plot twist is what got me, very humorous yet carefree. Especially enjoyed the interchange between the characters. Good job!
    Period 4

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  12. I'm glad to see some LBGT support on this blog! And some that is treated in such cheerful humor! It's great to see an addressing of the more dark aspects without dipping too far away from the original tone. Overall, a funny and impactful work!
    Charles Purcell
    Per. 5

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  13. i loved everything! i mostly liked the plot twist thats what really got me! keep posting :)

    oscar rodriguez
    period 6

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  14. Hahaha oh Milani, I loved the ironic twist of this story! The situational irony added a great comedic tone to everything, along with the colloquialism of how the two characters talked to each other and the character development of this Hannah girl. Nice job.
    Jacob Valdez
    Period 4

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  15. Woooww very lengthy but worth the read. That darm plot twist is what kept me reading. Anyway very great story loved it.
    keep it up.
    Andrew Hernandez
    Period 2

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  16. This is an amazing story!! I love how it tackles things that happen in this society!!! Congratulations on your piece of work and please continue to write !!

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  17. I want to start by saying that I really enjoyed your piece. The ending was definitely unexpected, but it did tie in with the part where she said that her brother is always trying to make things about himself, which I found really funny. But despite the plot twist, I liked how you addressed the idea that Hannah's parents will still love and accept her no matter what her sexuality, and thats the way it should be, even though Ben was the one that came out. Great job!

    Anthony Hurd
    Period 4

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  18. The dialogue sounds so natural which makes the events believable. I really enjoyed how easygoing you made their attitudes and just the overall manner of how they speak to one another. The plot twist at the end got me! it was so unexpected, but the twin telepathy must have worked its magic in this situation. Great story!

    Katelynn Gutierrez
    period 4

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  19. This was a great piece. The dialogue makes this not only an easy read, but relatable to everyday language. I really felt as though I understood Hannah's sarcastic, self-pitying character! The foreshadowing of the twin brother having telepathy and always trying to outshine you was so cleverly slipped in there. I could see this extended into some sort of sitcom!

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  20. I enjoyed this piece not only because of the quirkiness and clever plot which you presented but also the well thought out, yet comedic way you were able to write about in this coming-out story (well...attempt). Anyways, great jobs on the writing especially the hilarious plot twist at the end and I can't wait to read more of your work if there's any available!

    Andrew Trinidad
    Period 1

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  21. Spent the last few hours reading stories with a rather serious tone, but with a great story and messages to them. Your story is a great way to end off the day. I loved the comedic aspect you put into your story. I also loved how you put a problem everyone has about the type of people they go for. Most people spend too much time hiding themselves from the world that they don't really feel happy living in it. Everyone should just tell the world about who they really are and then they'll be happier to live in it. Life is too short to miss out on the things it can give. As long as you stay determined on how you live it, you'll always be happy and successful.
    -Justin Presto
    Period 2

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  22. I love this piece. It almost makes coming out easy and fun. I like how this piece is almost entirely satire and uses comedic relief. Great Job Milani.

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  23. I like the topic you chose for your story and how funny and lighthearted it came across to me. The tone is refreshing and the way you presented your characters made me enjoy them all.

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  24. I like how this story has humor but is also serious at the same time. good job! -Altierre Paris

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  25. This piece was a good example of how one shouldn't stress so much on the idea of coming out to their loved ones. The piece gives you a first hand look on how one would feel trying to come out to their parents but puts a twist that makes it an overall funny idea of sibling rivalry as well. This was a great piece to read nice job!

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  26. I really liked this story. It was very humorous and entertaining.

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  27. This story was so freaking adorable! I see you added humor to your piece which works great with the satirical devices we have been learning in class. I see that you have been paying attention in class because of the way you used sarcasm and the witty responses in the dialogue between the characters. My favorite part was the plot twist especially since Hannah should have expected it. Her brother new all along and she was the one who had no idea. I loved your piece amazing job!
    Evelin Conde
    Period.5
    3/3/25

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  28. I was surprised by the end, but also not surprised. I thought that her brother might be gay right when you mentioned her twin always one-upping her. I really liked your comedic take on "coming out". I also enjoyed how you wrote her cover-up boyfriend as accepting and not controlling. It was a comedic take on the serious subject of "coming out" and you completely nailed it!

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