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Monday, October 20, 2014

"The Feline Mind" by Daniel A



Journal #1
How have I come to living in these low degrading standards! Why have I been taken by these beasts, with their ugly looks. I hear the stupid dog call our wardens beautiful. However when I look at them, I just think of Frankenstein’s hideous creation. Especially with the little ones they call “children”. I’ll be sure to claw their legs when they walk down the hallway.

Journal #2
            I still to this day am highly confused as to how that dumb dog can have so much love for these monsters. Just this morning I saw the humans soaking him in water as if it were some type of ritual or sacrifice, I couldn’t bear to look at this atrocity. Nearly an hour later the dog returned happier than ever. I still am having a hard time understanding how he could possibly enjoy being sacrificed by soap and water. He has my pity----- for now at least.

Journal #3
            Curse my masters! I have been confined to the prison they call a kennel! How dare they do this to me, I have caused no mayhem within their establishment---yet. I keep trying to yell for my fellow comrades to help me escape from this degrading prison, however my screams for aid are confined by this metal shield the humans ride in. I keep hearing the two bigger savages mention something called a vet and neutering. I have no idea on what these things are but I don’t want to find out. I see the dog in the other prison! Maybe he can help me- oh wait I forgot, the dog is my mortal enemy. If I meet my fate at this vet so shall he! The human’s mobile shell has stopped, my heart is racing as I look out of my prison to come face to face with another savage. Is this the vet I have heard of? Yes this is the vet, she seems nice. Now all I need to know is what neutering means.

           

10 comments:

  1. Christian Black
    11/1/14
    Period 1

    Hey Daniel, this piece was absolutely hysterical! I like how you separated each entry as a journal and personified the cat inside this piece. For a moment I thought it was a human narrating the story; until they went into detail about how terrible it was witnessing the dog take a
    'bath". I loved how you gave the narrator an attitude of pride and superiority about themselves; in my option ever cat has that attitude about themselves which made this piece perfect. Well Done Daniel!

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  2. Hey Daniel!
    Your piece made me die of laughter, oh my goodness. The whole time, nostalgia was filling me because the cat totally reminded me of Garfield. I really was waiting for lasagna to be mentioned. Anyways, I think the way you personified the cat was perfect because when I look into the eyes of my best friend's cat, I can totally see it calling me a savage, but I think one thing you can work on to make the piece flow a little better is the punctuation. There was nothing too, too major, but I think looking it over one more time would've improved the flow a lot more and made it less choppy! Other than that, your piece was hilarious and I'm happy I chose to read yours. (:

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  3. This story was very funny to me. I found myself laughing throughout the entire thing. I liked how you used the point of view to add humor to the story. The dramatic irony of neutering was also hilarious. I also enjoyed the use of journal entries to progress your story and how each one had a somewhat suspenseful toll on me. I loved the whole passage and how you subtly included various literary devices to play into the entire effect. –Nate Shepard P.1

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  4. I really enjoyed how you put this story in as its a journal which is very unique and interesting way to write a story. The best part of this story is that i found myself laughing very much.

    Valerie Perez
    11.6.14
    period 6

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  5. This is the most entertaining piece I've read so far. I love the concept of writing from the cat's point of view and I especially enjoy how bitter and pretentious the cat's personality turned out to be. Really good job

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  6. This entry was very fun to read. I enjoyed your setup, and execution, specifically the separation into journal entries, which added to the cat's character. I also highly enjoyed that final line. It put a smile on my face and made me chuckle. Good job.
    Andy Reinschmidt

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  7. This was great! I'm not a cat person so i loved the way you made the cat seem like a mean and evil creature, because they are. By far my favorite part is the ending, oh the irony.

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  8. So this is why cats can be so evil. It really is funny though how you used the seemingly erratic behavior of a cat (which causes chaos one second and then lies asleep the next) and made sense of it, at least in a fictional sense. A very easy yet funny read. If there was one thing I wish I could see in there is how the cat reacts when it gets pet by the "savages." I mean I could think of a bunch of things you could say about that right now. Still very nice job.

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  9. I read the story without reading the title and man, it is so funny either way. I really liked how you captured the cynicism and anger of the common house pet. The struggle is just so real with this cat and I feel for him and his subtle ignorance about the workings of the world, especially neutering. The diction words that I personally liked were "sacrifice", "beasts", "prison", "mayhem", and savage". This cat character you've created is my spirit animal. Thank you for the good laugh :)
    Damairis Lao Period 1

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  10. Margeret Moyer
    Per.5
    Daniel I loved this and I think you did an amazing job portraying a cat. I have owned a cat and currently do and I sometimes feel like my cats were thinking these thoughts, especially when they are in a bad mood. I thought your words of choice like 'claw' or referring to the dog as 'dumb' giving it a cat feel.

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