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Wednesday, January 29, 2014

"Nerves" by Tyler R


      Michael had been preparing for months. He knew exactly what he was going to say. Every word was packed into his mind. The words were running on repeat in his head while he drove to the building. He pulled into the parking lot and sat in his car, contemplating what the rest of the night would have in store for him. He sat there for a good while, just thinking. He finally got the urge to get out of his car and start walking. With each footstep Michael took, his anxiety and worries grew. When he finally arrived to the classroom, he opened the door to find a few others preparing, just as he was. The minute he walked into the room, he felt an aura of preparation. Everyone else was doing just as he was. He sat his valuables on a black plastic chair. He grabbed his headphones from his pocket, and after excruciating minutes of untangling, he finally popped the buds into his ears and began to prep. The only music that would put him in the right state of mind was some classic Hip-Hop. As Tupac and Biggie serenaded his ear drums, Michael began to grow confident in himself and his abilities. He had to hype himself up in order to do well. If he did not think he was great, no one else would. He still had about 30 minutes. He took the headphones out of his ears and walked into the back. He could see the lights projecting underneath the curtain. Michael put his earbuds back in and closed his eyes. He was in a deep trance, again, going over the hundreds of words he had to know. He went over each word in chronological order then shut off his music and just began to listen to his surroundings. He could hear the pitter-patter of each foot that came into the room. The thin curtain separating Michael and them could not shut out the sounds of the people’s voices and excitement for what they knew was in store. Michael’s peers began to funnel in, backstage with him. They had all prepared and were ready for the next two hours. These feeble hours meant so much to everyone, especially Michael. The weight of everyone was on his shoulders. He felt everyone on the other side of the curtain was there to see a show, and he had to give it to them. He saw the lights below the curtain flicker, and along with the lights, the murmur of the crowd began to fade as well. He shook out his limbs, pounded his fist on his chest once or twice, and peeled the curtain back, making way for him. He walked out onto the stage, took a deep breath in, a long breath out, the lights went up, and he began his monologue.
“May I be so converted and see with these eyes, I cannot tell, I think not…”

31 comments:

  1. Correct me if I am wrong, but I think MICHAEL is YOU?!?!? Haha well Ive gotta say this was very entertaining to read. It's always so interesting to see how different actors prep because you guys prepare for literal transformations! This story was very relatable, and I like how you broke each step of preparation down to the bone...I could almost hear a faint biggie serenading me with 'I love it when you call me big papa' when I was reading this. Your eye for detail was what made this story so suspenseful and I can definitely see your passion through your writing. GOOD JOB TYLER!:)
    - Sherry Li period 5

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  2. Wow, Tyler!!! Thank you for giving us insight to how it feels as an actor before going out on stage to speak in front of an audience! I have never acted nor given a monologue in front of others. I can only imagine! The vivid imagery and transparent emotion that you used in your story conveyed to me how those "nerves" feel before it is show time. Great job!

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  3. The imagery and the emotion you put into this amazing Tyler. It really shows a lot and makes you wonder who this person is because there so much going on. This is a great piece for people who get nervous or are shy.

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  4. Nice job! You gave me the insight on the life of an actor, and I never though it would be so much pressure.

    -Sabrina Rondero Per.5

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  5. Just like Sherry said, I'm wondering why you chose to make this a flash fiction. I feel like anyone who knows you that will read this can really tell that Michael = you. Maybe this is your form of Charlotte Bronte's "autobiography"? I swear, if Michael turns out to be your middle name or pseudo name or something...

    Anyway, I did quite enjoy this piece. It's actually quite interesting to see the preshow rituals of other performers. I know I prepare for performances a whole lot different than you do. I only really practice my song once or twice. I warm up my vocal chords, and then I shut up for a good half hour. And drink lots of water. Personally, I'm always afraid of practicing too much because I feel like that would cause me to pysch myself out because I'd been going into practice overdrive. But that's just me.

    I found myself smiling a little when you started referencing Biggie and Tupac. The story initially felt serious, but then this part seemed to change the mood. At that moment, I was laughing inside my head because I find it kind of an awesome ridiculousness that you hype yourself up with hip-hop...before acting out Shakespeare. Two very opposite ends of the entertainment spectrum, lol.

    It's kind of funny because I didn't realize this was about a play until the ending of the story. I kind of took the situation as Michael was entering the room and had to recite something for some type of competition? I guess I was thinking of like American Idol auditions. IDK. I'm probably just really bad at interpreting this.

    But I felt kind of excited when you started mentioning the "curtains" and how your friends-I mean, Michael's friends-started filling up the seats. It was soon show time and Michael was hopefully pumped up enough.

    Overall, great job at this. I enjoyed that you brought the audience along with Michael to take us into the mind of an actor. It's nice to see just how passionate you are about acting, because it definitely shows in your performances. I swear, I think that you, Sarrah, and Jack are all going to make it big someday. I feel like I'm going to end up watching a play in Times Square or something and then BAM I see Jack's name or your name or Sarrah's name in the programme.

    Good job, again. I also hope you three continue to act in the future. I think you all were destined to pursue it furhter.

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  6. I found myself feeling nervous while reading, excited for your character. I loved the details with the ipod, those infernal earbuds that always get get tangled up, and the hiphop music. The details added a witty overtone that I enjoyed as a reader. -Emily Wilt per 1.

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  7. Hey Benedick (Tyler) you did a great job of using imagery to describe the way that any performer or athlete prepares and what is running through their head as they get ready. It is incredibly nerve racking and you described it perfectly. Good job

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  8. Tyler, this piece was great! Having never been in theater myself, I think you did a wonderful job of portraying what a show feels like from the perspective of a performer. Your writing technique was commendable - it lent a good deal of suspense to the story. As a reader, I felt it was quite easy to relate to Michael; when he sat nervously listening to music, I too felt my heartbeat racing. This narrative was a true eye-opener to the life of an actor. Nice job!

    -Christina Tapia

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  9. This piece gave me so much anticipation, I felt my heart beating faster as you prepared for your performance (I say you, of course, because you are obviously Michael ^-^) I love how you were able to add a few things for comedic relief amidst a serious experience (pumping your fist on your chest). Thanks for giving us such a good glimpse into a performer's life; it's super easy for the rest of us to just sit back and enjoy the show, but it is a completely different thing altogether to actually have to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the stage!

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  10. Wow, this is exactly how I feel whenever I'm nervous. I start to zone out the world around me. I'm assuming this is how you feel before each show, but you seem so collected on stage. You were very descriptive and I felt like I was right next to you the whole way. It takes a lot of courage and skill to become an actor. Extremely easy to follow, enjoyable and the imagery was on point. A very fun and suspenseful story that build up till the end and didn't disappoint.

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  11. Really nice job Tyler. The anticipation and suspense was well done. It made me feel the same suspense that "Michael" was feeling throughout the piece. It also gives some insight into what actors do for preparation right before a play. Excellent job

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  12. I loved how detailed and precise your piece was. You wrote in a way that was very easy to follow, and it was interesting to see the phases of how you were feeling about your impending performance. It was also really cool reading this and seeing the different ways that people prepare for performances. As a singer, I have often been in the same position, prepping to go out and let my voice out, then feeling a sense of deep calm spread throughout my mind right before it's time. I could completely relate to your experiences, except for my listening to the songs I'm about to perform rather than Tupac and Biggie of course. Though I have never performed a monologue (besides reciting several in English class, which is not the same thing AT ALL), I feel now like I can understand what goes through an actor's mind before stepping into the character's shoes. Thanks for allowing me to comparing our experiences, great job Tyler!

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  13. What made this most intriguing, I think, was the topic itself. The idea of the anticipation right before a "performance" of any kind is so heart-pumping to me! This gives me flashbacks to when I was in debate and drama, class presentations and jeu de roles. Everyone has felt this at some point in their life. That moment of collected nervousness, when you know you've done all you can to prepare for that ONE moment. Especially for an actor such as yourself. All in all, I really enjoyed this because it's so real and so insightful for everyone who reads it:)

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  14. The time slowing effect was pretty awesome! The way you explained everything in extreme detail allows the reader a first person point of view of what truly goes on in an actor's mind. The extreme detail also gives the reader a feel that all of this detail is not really necessary but it just goes on through the actor's mind. The structure of your paragraph as one whole block of text adds a cramped feeling to the reader which just adds feeling to the words that cannot be easily achieved through just text. Good job!

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  15. There are two things in particular I really liked about this. Firstly, the topic. My heart pumps a little faster just thinking about presentations and memorization, but at the same time It feels so good when you get to that moment and feel a calm sense of preparedness instead of the typical nerves. Secondly, I really enjoyed the small details. Comments such as "He shook out his limbs, pounded his fist on his chest once or twice" and "If he did not think he was great, no one else would" really helped to convey the emotions of "Michael" and what he goes through before a performance. The small actions made me feel like it was really a description of you and the self-motivation only made me more confident in that, but overall I really enjoyed this because I can relate so well to the emotions conveyed.

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  16. I really enjoyed this story,it was what i would picture, about how someone preparing for a play t get ready. The story itself was interesting and i found it funny at parts. It was very well written.good job, i specifically liked the part where, you dd a lot of details of when Michael walks into the room.


    -Jose Mancillas

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  17. As somebody who gets so nervous he shakes, its nice to see a talented actor like you knows how it feels. I really like a specific line a lot. "If he did not think he was great, no one else would." Its something to keep in mind when I rehearse and such. Thanks for the story Tyler.
    -Kevin McCondichie

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  18. You did an excellent job in writing your story. I really enjoyed how you allowed the readers to progress through the mind of this individual. As he got nervous I got nervous. His situation was so relatable because there has been multiple occasions where I questioned whether I could deliver a performance or presentation knowing that I had rehearsed several times. I also appreciated the twist you had with his music being of Tupac and Biggie. It was really funny and also relieved me of the stressful situation. Good job.

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  19. Your piece was something everyone could so easily relate to. The nerves one feels before a presentation before a crowd is something we become all too familiar with. The way you described the actions and feelings, it was as if I was the one about to go up and present. I very much enjoyed your story, great job.

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  20. Great work, "Michael"! I appreciated your use of vocabulary and I applaud your ability to capture the feeling of sitting backstage with the knowledge that the entire show may in fact rest on your Benedick shoulders. I'm glad Tupac and Biggie could "serenade" your ears and it was a true delight to read your account of being backstage and getting ready for a show.
    -Jack McDonald

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  21. A day in the life of Tyle... I mean Michael. This "pregame" for an actor sounds eerily familiar to an athlete's pregame, as it is much of the same thing I do before I head out to go into a match. As awful as that drama 1 class is, I see striking resemblances to that mess as well, just in the nerves that are felt. I love the way the nervousness just fades away, as he gets into his zone, prepared for anything and everything.

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  22. This instantly reminded me of that one Eminem song, the "Lose Yourself" or something like that, where the performer completely blows up in front of the audience, (and something about spaghetti?) and I was thinking to myself the entire time, this dude is totally gonna mess up, wow, i'm getting anxious reading this- and i'm not even him. And you know WHY Tyler? Why I experienced those things? It's because you did a gosh good job writing this and conveying to the reader what the character was feeling and experiencing through imagery and descriptive emotional actions that allowed empathy to the reader. Good job.

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  23. Well done in showing the process of getting prepared to perform, whether its on stage or getting ready for a game getting yourself ready is a difficult task. "If he did not think he was great no one else would" one of my favorite quotes, is really true and a good way to self motivate and get confidence and be ready to perform. I could feel the emotions Michael was going through throughout the story. Very good.
    -Cody Molla p.4

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  24. Wow this was great! I love how you showed us how it feels to be an actor and all the pressure that comes with it. It showed how much work you put into your passion. Good job!

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  25. When first reading this, I was thinking to myself "Hm, I wonder if this is about school? Maybe sport?" I continued reading out of curiosity, and I was not disappointed to see what was up ahead. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that it was in fact, about the emotions and anxiety one faces before a performance. The gradual build up of the piece had a very satisfying release of tension by the time the last word of this piece was read. It was really nice to see the perspective of a performer, when it seems like the main interests in students nowadays revolves around athletics! Thank you for this new, fresh perspective!

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  26. I love the way you approached this subject. I'm no stranger to nerves on stage, and I know it helps to have some sort of preparatory ritual before a performance. I felt the anxiety of the situation, but at the same time I felt the strong determination and focused tranquility. I particularly liked the trailed-off ending, leaving the reader at the peak of the event.

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  27. Presentations are something everyone has to deal with and i think this piece nails what it feels like spot on. The preparation giving way to execution feels good after all the anxiety has been mounting. Very relatable and a nice piece. Good work!

    -Arturo D. Ayala

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  28. Right as the story started, I felt it would be about the nerves an actor has (the title kind of helped), and I was right! Is Michael a characterization of you? I'm really glad that you shared this story about how nerve-wracking it is to be an actor and still give such stunning performances. I love that you included things that help to calm one down as they prepare for their stage time. Good job!

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  29. I can imagine that Michael's heart continuous to beat faster and faster as the performance is getting closer to starting. I liked how the story builds up tempo to match with what Michael's heart is probably doing. I found it very interesting. This was suspenseful and your use of detail allowing an insight into any performers mind made it even better. Good job. - Oscar Salazar

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  30. I enjoyed this piece for several reasons, but the two biggest reasons are: 1) it is very relatable 2) it makes the reader feel as if they were there with Michael as he was preparing. Most have their own rituals to prepare or conquer a task. Nervousness/Anxiety is probably the most common feeling when it comes to speaking/performing in front of a big crowd. Your use of detail in the actions of Michael helped to piece the scene together in my imagination, like the tangled earphones and the lights of the stage. I also really liked how you gave a brief piece of the monologue, and did not simply end the story with him coming out on stage. I would however like to say that your sentences lacked variation; most of them felt stocky and the same length. Over-looking this, I thoroughly enjoyed your piece.

    - Alan Medina

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  31. This is exactly how I feel for a school presentation. The nerves get to me and I tend to mess up. This writing gave me the same feeling that "Micheal" went through because of all the great detail you put in. Good Job Tyler!

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