It was the night of
July 25, 2007. I was eating dinner with my family when all of sudden there was
a knock at the door. Thinking little of it, my parents didn’t answer and went
back to enjoying our meal. About a minute had gone by when we heard another loud
thump, so I got up to answer the door but no one was there. Just as I began to
close the door, a small brown envelope on the ground caught my eye. Picking it
up I noticed a waxy, dark red seal on the back and written in perfect cursive
on the front was my name. I quickly tore open the mysterious letter. It read:
Dear Ms. Aguilar,
We are pleased to
inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and
Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term
begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.
Yours Sincerely,
Minerva McGonagall
Deputy Headmistress
My heart pounded as I raced back in
the house to show my parents this incredible piece of mail. “What is this?!” My
mother exclaimed. “It’s my Hogwarts acceptance letter, I can’t believe it!” I
cried. Suddenly, a great gust of wind blew open the front door and there stood
Rubeus Hagrid himself! “Hello there Alexandra,” the giant man bellowed, “I’ve
come to assist you on your trip to Hogwarts.” After saying goodbye to my
family, Hagrid and I left and off I was to the school of my dreams.
When we arrived at Hogwarts I was
taken aback by the marvelous castle. Although school did not start for another
week, a student orientation was being held throughout the day. All of the staff
was there, teaching the first years the basics of using their magical abilities
to prepare for school. Obviously there had been a mistake, for they did not
realize that I was not born with such supernatural gifts. As the day
progressed, the professors tried to teach me simple spells thinking I’d be able
to do something with them like the other kids had. At first it was easy
blending in, but soon most of the other students had shown some sign of their
magical talents while I was still unable to perform any of these minor tasks. I
willed myself to do something—anything—although in the back of my mind I knew I
would never be able to. Struggling with a new spell, I decided to take a break
and sit down. A few moments had passed when I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder.
“It’s alright, don’t give up,” chimed a young boy. He was lean with shaggy dark
hair, round glasses, and a peculiar scar in the shape of a lightning bolt on
his forehead. “My name is Harry Potter,” he said, “what’s yours?” “I’m
Alexandra,” I replied. And just like that I made a new friend.
This was such a fun read! The excited tone you used to write the story really allowed the reader to understand how you were feeling when you read the letter and when you saw the castle. The fact that you were unable to do magic in the story made me wonder whether an extended version of the story would have you finally completing a spell or really make it so that Hogwarts had made a mistake. The piece was well organized and easy to read. Great Job!
ReplyDeleteWhen I first saw the title I immediately clicked with interest. I like how you applied a Hogwarts letter with a college acceptance letter and then transitioned in to a story! I also like how you incorporated imagery to give the reader a better picture of what was going on. Overall it was very interesting.
ReplyDeleteYou essentially just described my dream! But seriously, this was so cute, and I loved how you got to be friends with Harry Potter himself. I also loved the way you used imagery to make it seem like I got accepted into Hogwarts as well. This was really a great read, good job!
ReplyDeleteI personally have never read the Harry Potter series, so I must admit that I was not familiar with some of the references. However, despite my lack of insight, it was evident that this piece was superbly constructed. Your writing was flawless and your use of imagery seemed effortless. I admire how well you blended a typical, mundane occurrence, like a family meal, with such a fantastic experience. While I may lack a thorough understanding of Hogwarts, your representation of it aroused my curiosity. Nice job!
ReplyDelete-Christina Tapia
Well first, congratulations on your acceptance to Hogwart! Haha I really, really enjoyed this piece. You can always tell a person's writing abilities by his/her literary eloquence, and you were definitely no exception! This piece was written with fluidity and creativity. If I were to write a fiction, my ideas would be scattered all over the place but you were able to put everything into a coherent whole! Good job Alex :)
ReplyDeleteLike Erin said, I was drawn to read your piece because of its title :) Haha I thought your piece was endearing and it brought me back to my fantastical wish that I could one day go to Hogwarts. I love Harry Potter and you did a great job with bringing back memories of a large part of my childhood
ReplyDeleteGosh Alex! I'm so jealous of your acceptance letter! Anyways your charming story warmed my heart. I love that you included Harry Potter too. Honestly though I was awaiting Hermione's entrance. She would have been an excellent tutor and might have been able to draw out your hidden magical powers. Lovely piece, great job. -Emily Wilt
ReplyDeleteYour story was very cute! It was creative how you incorporated elements of Harry Potter, but made it your own story. In your first paragraph, I liked how you started off with "It was the night of..." to create an anecdote feel. Also, I thought it created a suspenseful feel that attributed to what you were going for in the first paragraph. If I could give one tip of advice, I would say that I felt like the ending could have been stronger. I felt like I wanted to feel some sort of completion that you were able to know how to do a spell. Overall, good story!
ReplyDeleteWow Alex, what an amazing conept to marvel about. I'm pretty sure I've been accepted to Hogwarts too, no doubt, the letter's just late. Delayed, maybe. It'll come. Just you wait. It'll come.
ReplyDeleteBut anyways, nice story telling skills, your descrpitions made me feel like I was really there. And I will be. Someday. Shhhhh you'll all see.
I loved it!!! I tried not to be such a girl, but I couldn't help it; I teared up! I am absolutely in love with the magical-ness of childhood. Such a great piece...probably my favorite story so far. This story was literally every child's dream. I want to know what happened next! Again, great stuff...I loved every bit of it.
ReplyDelete- Hannah Mueller (12) per.5
Wow what a great story I really like it keep up the great work and have fun at Hogwart!
ReplyDeleteYou've done it Alex... you have finally written the inner thoughts of every die-hard Harry Potter fan dreaming of going to Hogwarts. I really enjoyed your story. It was extremely creative and you developed the main character, you, in a way that any reader could see your personality. Your use of imagery brought out the true magic in this story. Don't worry about your magical powers! Your powers are in the creativity that you bring to your writing. Great job.
ReplyDeleteBeing quite a fan of the Harry Potter books and movies, as I saw the title on the sidebar, I clicked on your story right away. The struggle you present in your story is really endearing, and can I relate to it, because I can't perform magic either. Your detailed imagery allowed me to place myself in your story, which I really enjoyed, as it's a dream to be at Hogwarts. Overall, your story was nicely written and organized so that I had no trouble understanding your story and its transitions.
ReplyDeleteHaving read all of the Harry Potter series i really enjoyed this piece. I thought it was so clever how you actually used some of the main characters names and it was very interesting the descriptions you used of your feelings through the story.
ReplyDelete- Percy Starks
Oh my goodness.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I have literally dreamed of this fateful day since the beginning of time. I know that my Hogwarts letter is just stuck in the mail somewhere waiting for me to open it. When college letters come in, I know that an acceptance letter to Hogwarts is in my near future. When I read this, I smiled the whole time. It was cute and made me laugh. It was also nostalgic; I loved it!
Very nice topic! I'm really a fan of Harry Potter so it made it even that much more interesting to read! The use of imagery in this made me feel like I was there and everything was easily visualized. It would be amazing if we really had a place like Hogwarts. There were no hiccups in your writing and it seemed to flow very well! I only wish you wrote more because your story telling was great! It literally kept me glued! Well done!
ReplyDeleteAlex! Oh my gosh. I really love your blog idea! Your use of fantastic imagery made me feel like I was there with you. Your great use of words conveyed your emotions throughout the blog. I could feel that you were happy, shocked and just outright amused with getting that acceptance letter. Harry Potter is amazing and I'm glad that you got to meet him. (:
ReplyDeleteGreat job girl!
-Tia Basa
I absolutely loved this story. Being an avid Harry Potter reader and crazy fan, I have always dreamt of receiving a Hogwarts acceptance letter! Your tone throughout the story was so exciting and it kept reading all the way to the congratulatory end. Great job.
ReplyDeleteAlexis Santiago
Oh my goodness. I am fan - girling right now (for the lack of better terms.) This is something all Harry Potter fans wish to experience!!! I was smiling throughout the whole piece. The way there was a discouragement definitely raised the tension, but that was released at the right timing with the entrance of Harry Potter, giving the audience such a sensational feeling of relief and happiness. Wonderful job!!!
ReplyDeleteAlexandra! I really liked how you incorporated yourself in the magical realm of Hogwarts! It really reminds me of how sometimes we wish to immerse ourselves in other realities when reading a good novel. Your last sentence is effective and superb!
ReplyDeleteOH GOODNESS. I IMMEDIATELY CLICKED ON THIS SUBMISSION.
ReplyDeleteThis piece definitely made my heart skip a beat with glee since I adored how you incorporated Harry Potter into it.
Therefore, I congratulate you on your acceptance to Hogwarts and to making friends with Harry Potter himself!
This was a swift read because it gave me, as the reader, something to relate to since it had the concept of an ordinary, non-magical individual entering Hogwarts.
The organization of this piece made it easier for the reader to follow along since the piece is divided with an introduction of what is happening, the letter of admission, the process of going to Hogwarts, fitting into Hogwarts, and the conclusion of how a friend can make one feel welcome in a place where one does not quite fit in.
Loved this piece!
AHH! I loved it ! You truly took me into the experience that I too imagined if I was ever accepted into Hogwarts! The details reflect the story presented in the Harry Potter books perfectly,right down to Minerva McGonagall signing off your acceptance letter! Then the ending was absolutely perfect because of Harry Potter! Awesome Job!
ReplyDeleteThe title of this piece caught my attention immediately. After reading it I can honestly say that you are such an amazing writer! You have a wonderful way with words, which makes reading what you write so interesting. Your descriptive details throughout the story made me know exactly how you would've felt if you had actually gotten accepted. Great job!
ReplyDeleteAww this is so cute! If only this could happen in real life. I'd definitely understand what it's like to be in your shoes.
ReplyDeleteI smiled at your statement: "Obviously there had been a mistake, for they did not realize that I was not born with such supernatural gifts." Would it be correct if I say I sensed a bit of sass there? Haha.
Anyway, I really enjoy this piece you wrote. I felt like a geek again and reading went by really quick for me (probably because of some of the 'Harry Potter' knowledge I have). I hope you contribute more to this blog in the future, even if its extra stuff! Your writing brought a smile to my face.
Keep it up! (:
Alex, thanks for choosing to write about this, it brought back many memories (I am a hardcore Harry Potter fan). Like Serena mentioned, it's like you witnessed one of my childhood dreams and decided to write about it. You did Hogwarts justice, and your eloquent way of writing made me eager to read more. In fact, I read this a few times, each time more entertaining than the last! Don't worry, I'm sure your magical powers will kick in shortly! Great job(:
ReplyDelete