"White Converse" by Dominique M

      I’ve always been a planner. I’ve always had a plan and about five other back up plans just
in case something went wrong. I had a plan for EVERYTHING and made sure I had one for EVERYTHING, to the point where I had shoe boxes in my room filled with supplies just in case an earthquake happened while I was asleep. One thing that I had never thought about planning for was an economic hardship of some sort. Then again why would I? I was only 11 and the only thing I worried about was having the “coolest” clothes. Even if I was to have a plan, how was I supposed to plan financially when my only source of “income” was an occasional allowance, birthday money, christmas money, and the random five dollars my grandpa would sometimes give me. So what was I supposed to do when I was 11 about to turn 12 and I put two and two together and realized that my parents were struggling to make ends meet. Well for my 12th birthday that year I was mainly given Target gift cards and money. It was perfect and exactly what I needed to buy my school supplies and clothes for the upcoming school year. I had it all planned out perfectly in my head. I would buy everything for myself to save my parents as much money as I possibly could. As the end of July neared my mom took me to Target for back to school shopping. I walked straight to the back to school section where I was met with a variety of notebooks, pencils, pens, paper, etc. I chose five notebooks, a pack of pencils, pens, highlighters, and loose leaf paper. I then realized that if I were to buy clothes I would not have enough to buy a backpack. Luckily I hadn’t gotten rid of my backpack from the previous school year, so I decided that I would re-use it to save money. I then proceeded to go to the girl’s clothes section to look for shirts. When I finally got there I was greeted by a sign that read, “5 for $20”. I looked at the shirts and debated long and hard on which ones to get. I finally came to a

decision and took all my items to checkout. The cashier rang up my items and I barely had enough on the gift card for everything. My mom then took me to Walmart to buy my jeans, they were on sale for 12 dollars. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed because I had to buy and wear jeans from Walmart. The clothes I would be getting for school that year were not the “cool” clothes I was used owning and wearing. My mother could tell that I was upset and tried to comfort me by telling me they were just jeans and that nobody paid attention to where they were from. She was correct but I was just too worried about being different and “uncool”. I grudgingly bought five pairs of jeans with my birthday jeans. My mom and I then walked back to the car and instead of leaving right away she apologized to me. She told me she was sorry that I had to buy my own supplies and clothes for school and that none of this was fair to me. I held back the tears in my eyes and pretended as if I wasn’t bothered and I reassured her that it was fine with me. We then went home and when we arrived it had dawned upon me that I didn’t have shoes for school. I decided not to mention it because I would not be able to buy them and I did not want my parents to use their money to buy me any. I thought to myself and realized that I could use my shoes from the past school year but I knew that they were beaten up and would probably not fit me correctly. It was as if I had a fairy godmother or something because my best friend and her cousin took me to the mall a few days later to buy shoes as a belated birthday present. I was allowed to choose two pairs, it was more than I could ask for. I ended up deciding on getting a pair of black vans and a pair of white converse. I considered many things and put a lot of thought when choosing which shoes to get. I had decided to get the white converse a size and a half bigger than my shoe size. This was my way of planning for the future. I had decided to get them bigger just in case things didn’t get better financially. If I got the shoes bigger then they would

last me longer and I could use them for multiple school years. To this day I still own my white converse and they now fit me correctly. Even though things have gotten better financially at home I don’t plan on ever getting rid of them. My white converse symbolize two things: perseverance and one of the greatest hardships I have faced in my life. They remind me that, “the dark doesn't last forever, even the night is whisked away by the sun eventually.” My white converse also taught me that people are too busy worrying about what others think of them and we as humans value material things more than we should. I was so worried about looking “uncool” because I was not wearing expensive clothes like many of the kids I went to school with. I finally realized that what brand or how expensive someone's clothes is means nothing. Although this was a very difficult time in my life I am thankful for being able to get through it and learn and grow from it.