June
26,2013 10:30 pm
It was just a normal summer night at
my house with my boyfriend. When we hear the sirens and red and blue lights of
an ambulance. A few seconds later my boyfriend got a text from his mom asking,
“Where are you?” After that, a call to my dad from my uncle was made asking “
Is Norma home?” A reply after “ Yeah,
What happened?” Uncle: “ Okay, good cause there is a big accident one street
from my house and four streets up your house.” Dad: “ No, everything is fine.
Hopefully everything is okay.” Uncle:” Okay, Bye.” Moments after my boyfriend
went home and everyone was getting ready for bed.
June
26,2013 11:30 pm
I was slowly climbing in bed when I
heard a ding coming from my phone. As I grabbed it I saw that it was a message
from my best friends older sister. I thought to my self “ Well this is weird,
why does she need me?” As I open the message the very first thing I read was
“she got in a car accident along with three others and all I know is that she
has a broken leg…” The first thing that came into mind was, the sirens, the red
and blue flashing lights, the text message, and the phone call form my uncle. I
quickly run out of my room and tell my parents the news of the accident. Once I
told them, I called my best friends mom to make sure this was not a joke and
find out if she is okay and what hospital the ambulance has transported her to.
June
26,2013 12:30 pm
As I gathered the information to go
see her, I quickly get dressed and head out the door with my dad. As we drive to
the hospital in the pitch-black freeway, I start to pray that hopefully nothing
critical has happened. As I arrived to the hospitals emergency entrance, I
encounter her family outside waiting to go see her. As I waited outside to go
in, I hear that she is okay. Nothing was to be worried about except for her
fractured femur. Shortly after that it was turn to go in. as I walk into the
very cold hospital, I walked by many other patients. I finally reached her; she
was all covered in a pink hospital blanket, talking about how she wanted her
“Starbucks coffee” and “Chap stick” for her chapped lips. Then out of nowhere
she said, “I’m going to sue the hospital for cutting up my favorite white
shorts! How dare they!” she was a ok, back to her normal self. By then my time
was up with her, cause some of her family members were next.
June
27,2013 4:00 am
Things took a twist. She fell into a coma in a
matter of couple of hours when I left her side. Early that morning they have
moved her to ICU (Intense Care Unit). Shortly after she had surgery on her
brain to limit the pressure between the brain and the skull. When everything
was done only two people at a time were able to go in the room and see her.
While her mom was crying in the hallway a friend and I went in. at the first
look I couldn’t believe it, this was not her. I was not used to seeing her in
such a fatigue stage. I tried to hold the tears back, but was hard with my
friend breaking down as I comfort her and calmed her down. Tears fell down my
face and we left the room. We couldn’t handle it anymore as we walked into the
waiting room we cried even more. This was not my best friend lying on that
hospital bed. I wanted her back; I never understood why did she have to get the
worst end of it all.
As days and weeks went by remained
the same. Some day she got worst and some days she would improve. Slowly and
steady she would show signs of improvement like moving her arm or reactions
when the doctors pinch her. She never liked it when they would do that. The
improvement became more consistent, the doctors decided to move her into a
children’s hospital in Los Angeles. Now from visiting her everyday it become to
once a week or when ever I have the change to drive myself there. And every time
I would go she was in a better state than before, but she still would not wake
up. The doctors even told us that if she wakes up, she would be lucky if she
can even brush her teeth. But I did not believe that cause I know she is a very
smart young woman that always finds a way out of everything. As the continuous
days and hours passed doctors, nurses, and therapist walked in and out. A nurse
noticed how a brutal therapist treated her very harshly, she would respond
more. Which meant the chances of her waking up were even sooner than on her
own. Sooner than we expected, she slowly started to wake up and more movement
was progressed. Even though the chances of her to being 100% normal were way
off the chart, she proved the doctors wrong each time. That was the best friend
I knew all along, always proving wrong and finding a way out.
It was not until late July that she
was fully awake and was aware of her surroundings. At this point she was moved
to another hospital in orange. Only this time I was able to go two-three times
a week. I would talk to her about everything still even though she couldn’t
talk. The smile or the look she would give was enough for me.
Now, till this day she is recovering
and improving back to her normal self. She is even still proving doctors wrong
till this very day I have never doubted her one bit since day one. I knew that
she was capable of, from the night of the accident the police officer said” It
is a true Miracle that she made it out of the truck alive.” One thing that I
learned from this one experience was to be aware with who you get in a car with
and your surroundings. She is a very blessed individual and as we all say,
“This is one race that God gave you and that every race you have raced you’ve
managed to finish strong. Now you got to finish this one even stronger than
before.”
-“Even miracles take a little time.”
Great work on your writing i like how you made the timeline in your writing so you inform the readers what day and time the story is taking part in
ReplyDeleteOkay...so this was a simply heart warming piece that had me tearing up... I cannot even imagine what it felt like to have such a close friend go through this... you did an amazing job of describing every step through the journey of you visiting your friend. The quote at the end is so inspiring great job.
ReplyDeleteThat was seriously deep. Is it a true story? I can't even begin to imagine that kind of tradgedy happening in my life to someone I care so much about. I hopr your friend is doing well. Great story!
ReplyDelete- Hannah Mueller (12) per.5
This was an amazing narrative. I loved the way you included the dates and times of each event; they provided a heightened sense of the rapidity of the situation. I remember hearing about the car accident from a friend and being shocked that someone my own age was in such critical condition. You did a great job at conveying your varying emotional responses throughout each new stage of your friend's condition. It was clear from your faithfulness in visiting her that you love her like a sister. I can't imagine what it would be like to witness by best friend go into a coma. I admire how confident you remained in your friend's resilience, despite what the doctors were telling you. I'm thankful you chose to share this piece with the class. I'll definitely be praying for both you and your friend.
ReplyDelete-Christina Tapia
This story definitly got me emotional. I know how it feels like to have a friend go through that and it really is hard. Your quote at the end is very inspiring and I do believe miracles take a little time. You did a wonderful job on this piece. When I read this, it reminded me a lot of my best friend. I like how you added the dates and time. Good job on this piece!!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing Norma. It really means a lot to us that you can share your personal experiences in such a beautiful and coherent way.
ReplyDeleteYour story was definitely very inspirational!! I felt very emotional and I can totally connect to you and I can feel your pain !! I know it must have been really hard to keep fighting and believing in your friend even though the doctors say otherwise but good thing they were wrong! I admire how strong your friend is and how you are too. I like how you dated your narrative because it builds up the suspense. I am really glad that your friend is okay!! This piece proved that miracles can happen and that we all just have to be patient! This piece was very touching and you did an amazing job!!!
ReplyDeleteI cannot fathom the turmoil of emotions you went through this summer. This unfortunate incident serves as an inspirational reminder-that we are truly blessed because everything can be taken away in a second.
ReplyDeleteI feel honored that you were able to share with us your story and your friend's and I do believe that you and your friend can only grow stronger from this experience. I really like the way you structured your piece because I believe allowed us to feel a little more personally connected to your story. I also liked how you included the quotes at the end as well.
ReplyDeleteI feel honored that you were able to share with us your personal experience as well as your friend's. I liked how you structured your piece because I felt like it allowed us reader's to feel more personally connected with the story since it connected us to your detailed thoughts and actions. I do believe that what you and your friend have experienced will only make you stronger. I also like the quotes you included at the end :)
ReplyDeleteNorma you did a great job with telling your story. I was able to visualize each situation in the story since you described each event so well. I can relate to your situation and I know how hard being in that situation is. I really liked how even though your story wasn't directly about you, there was insight about yourself during the story.
ReplyDeleteThe optimism you kept throughout the story shows what a strong and loyal person you are and I really enjoyed reading your story. Choosing to write in dates and times and using such detail to describe your experience made it easy to follow and it felt as if we were right there, watching the whole situation play out like a movie. The structure of the piece and organization made it seem as though you were taking pages straight from a journal. I appreciate you sharing such an uplifting piece despite the fact that it is such an emotional and personal story! Nice Job!
ReplyDeleteNorma I remember hearing about this story and at the time I could not visualize what had happened but now I am able to put pieces together of what happened with the imagery you incorporated. This piece was really deep and touched my heart and I know it took a lot to write about. I love the quote at the end because its relatable to everyone and their own situations.
ReplyDeleteThis was really deep and personal. I really admire the fact that you can write about it and feel extremely honored to read something so close to your heart. This really touched me, especially since I heard about everything happening the time that it happened. Your details were extremely "detailed", to a fact that I painted a picture in my head to go along with your events, it was like a movie. The structure felt like a diary entry, especially the dates and times that you put at the top of each entry. This definitely made it feel personal. I love that it had an anticipation feel to it as well and thank God it ended with a happy ending that she is recovering. :)
ReplyDeleteWow. This was really compelling. Its interesting to hear about something that most people heard about from a person that it actually affected. This was very well written and your positive attitude allowed me to read it without bursting into tears. You really did a great job.
ReplyDelete-Kyra Young
I remember hearing about your friend's accident from another friend and I couldn't believe what happened. I'm glad you chose to write your piece about your friend because it shows how strong you both are and that you guys have a great true friend relationship. I know it was probably tough writing about this but I like how you explained in detail what happened because I felt like I was there experiencing everything because of the distinctive imagery and detail you gave.
ReplyDeleteWhile reading this i could not shake the thought of how strong and positive you stayed not only for yourself but for your best friend. I think what we can all take out of this is that if you stay strong and have faith good will prevail. The quote at the end also spoke to me because even though sometimes we want things to happen quickly, patience is a virtue and you proved that to all who read this inspirational story.
ReplyDelete-Percy Starks
These kind of incidents are the ones that make me realize how important it is to enjoy those precious moments I have with the people I love. I love that you were able to share this because I know it must of been hard to witness this which is so unfair. I found it really intriguing that you wrote your piece like journal entries because I was able to imagine what you experienced from the moment you found out what happend, to her most recent recovery.I am so glad that she is doing better and Ill keep praying that one day we get to see her come back to school. Great job!
ReplyDeleteOh, and I LOVED the quotes you added at the end they brought your entire piece together. :)
I am so glad you were comfortable telling this story. I remember hearing about the accident and wishing that everything was okay. Your feelings were so real and it was so emotional, I did get a little teary eyed. They way you ended the story with the quote made such a great ending! Thank you for sharing with us!
ReplyDelete-Taylor Robles
Wow. Not only was this written very well, the experience you shared was very sad, but inspirational. I can totally relate too. My trial may not have been with a friend getting into an accident and going into a coma, but I know how hard it can be when you have a friend with certain circumstances that heighten the chance of any moment being their last. It is very easy to give up hope, but although clinging to that hope may be hard at time, it is worth it and it does make a difference in their recovery. It motivates them and helps them build their own hope and will to live.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such an emotional and private part of your life with us- I, like a lot of other people, knew of the accident, but not everything about it. Reading about how horrible the circumstances actually were made me really admire not only her strength, but the strength of you and all her friends and family. She is certainly a fighter, and I love how much she has inspired you. I loved your quote at the end too! She will most definitely finish this race stronger than ever, and I can't wait for the day when she can come back to school and graduate with us!
ReplyDeleteWow this is so beautiful. I admire the fact that you were able to open up and share your story with all of us in such an intriguing and enticing way. The way you broke the story up by including the dates and times of each event. It made me feel like I was going through the progression along with you. Thank you for sharing this touching story.
ReplyDelete-Alexis Santiago
This was an extremely emotional and touching piece. I truly appreciate you sharing this, and I'm sure everyone else that has read it, does as well. The details were all their and made my stomach turn. once again, thank you.
ReplyDeleteThis story had me wanting to bring out the tears. Remembering julissa and how great she is to everyone made it hard to think that such an atrocity could happen to her. The narrative itself was extremely well written and heart-wrenching
ReplyDeleteI was shocked when I heard that Julissa was in a car accident, I didn't know how bad it was until I heard that she was in a coma. Thank you for sharing this story. I really like how you formatted this story with the time and dates. It is a blessing that Julissa woke up and how well she is recovering.
ReplyDeleteThis piece was definitely heartwarming and emotional piece. The idea of someone who you love and are so close to going through an incident like this is unbelievable. From a simple broken bone leading into something so serious is unexpected and heart wrenching. It was inspiring to see how you were there for your friend and that you never lost faith throughout the circumstance. I also loved the quote that you used at the very end. It gave it a very nice finish. Nice job.
ReplyDelete-Jessica Berrie
This was so good ! Telling everyone the real story of what happened and giving the point of view of her best friend was a great idea. I definitively got a little emotional and I'm glad you shared that with us.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such a beautiful story. Your organization and vivid imagery really brought to life the experience and how it impacted it. One of my favorite parts of the piece was how used the metaphor about finishing the race. It made your piece so powerful, while adding the touch of your friend's desires. I also loved how you explained the belief you had throughout this whole experience, and how your friend's actions revealed that your beliefs came true.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Norma. This is such an unfortunate event that no one should ever have to deal with. Unfortunately, due to the unpredictable nature and how fragile life is this happens more often than not. I'm glad she's recovering just fine.
ReplyDeleteNorma this was a great piece. It has reminded me of such a tragic event, i am glad you shared it with this blog community. it is very inspiring and demonstrates that miracle do happen.
ReplyDeleteLast comment from Alan Medina. i forgot to add my name at the end.
ReplyDeleteWow... thank you so much for sharing this. While I was reading this, I felt as if I was there throughout the whole time. I'm deeply saddened to hear what you went through, but at the same time, the optimism you carried throughout the whole piece reassured me that everything will be all right. Your friend is definitely strong for pulling through all this, but at the same time, you're also an incredibly strong person. I don't know you, but reading this made me truly realize how strong of a person you are. This piece has truly inspired me to believe that "miracles take a little time." The quote that you ended the piece was a perfect cherry on top of a sundae. (: You're such an amazing person for staying strong!
ReplyDeletethat was interesting quote /jakob cadena
ReplyDeleteYour being able to share this narrative of a personal event as difficult as this one is really laudable!! I enjoyed the attention to detail and use of chronological order. The emotions that you were feeling were palpable and easy to relate to. Thank you for sharing this very personal story!!
ReplyDeleteIt is always an honor and a privilege to read such an inspirational story. I found nothing distinctly wrong with your piece; the dialogue kept the reader involved and connected with the story, and the organization was well written. She truly is a miracle and you and her are in my prayers. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThis was so vivid, and personal that I really was captivated from the start. It really touched my heart, seeing so much emotion written on the page. This was a really great depiction of an accident, and its great to hear that she's doing okay! Great writing!
ReplyDeleteThis is a great piece and is executed nicely. The emotion comes off the page, especially when you change the lengths of your sentences from short and choppy then elongate them later. ("Things took a twist. She fell into a coma in a matter of couple of hours when I left her side. Early that morning they have moved her to ICU (Intense Care Unit)." It adds to the effectiveness of the representation of calamitous thoughts that rushed into your brain on that day. This is nice of you to share this event with everyone.
ReplyDeleteThat story was the deepest story I have ever read. it felt like it could be a reality. Great description and detail. it couldnt of bee better
ReplyDeleteTommy McDonnell